Amazing Grace
Chapter 2
This wasn’t supposed to happen. Holmes Chapel wasn’t supposed to find me in London. Harry, my family, the trial... it was all supposed to go away. I wasn’t Grace Abbot anymore. I was Ava Smith and Ava Smith didn’t know any Harry Styles. Yet here he was standing dangerously close to me in all his angelic glory. The tension between us was palpable, like you could reach out and touch it. It was overwhelming being so close to him after so long, especially considering how things had ended, and it turned my mouth dry and knocked the air out of my lungs. I just stared at him, those green eyes and perfect lips, that curly hair and long thick eyelashes. Everything I remember about him hadn’t changed and it felt like a dream.
“Are you really here?” he asked after a minute of silence.
“Yeah, I guess so” I laughed awkwardly. What do you say to someone who you hadn’t seen in two years? Harry eyed me curiously and he opened his mouth as if to speak but stopped himself. I already knew what he was going to ask. “Listen, it’s really me, yes I’m really here. But you can’t tell anyone. Grace is gone ok? I can’t explain it to you, but I have a different life now and you need to forget you ever saw me. Get it Styles?” I expected him to be hurt, to hate who I’d become, to walk away, but instead he laughed. That just made me angrier, “What? What is funny about this? You have no idea how much danger you are putting me and yourself and Zak in just by talking to me!” I spat at him, trying to keep my voice low so Zak wouldn’t overhear.
At my mention of Zak’s name Harry’s smirk dropped from his face and his eyes lost the amused light that had been there before. “Who’s Zak? Your new toy? Are you just gonna run away from him too?” he hissed at me, the short temper I knew him to have leaking out. The pain in his eyes was too much for me to bear. I wanted to tell him, I wanted him to know why. I took out a pen from bag and grabbed his hand. The size contrast between my anorexic fingers and his enormous callused hand was surprising, but I tried not to let him see that on my face. I jotted down the only safe address I could think of on the inside of his palm.
“What is-“ he started to ask but I cut him off.
“It’ll really be better for you if you don’t ask questions. Be at that address tomorrow at quarter to 12 and don’t say anything to anyone.” I said quickly “Now go. Go home and don’t try to look for me and don’t you dare follow me Styles” I warned. With that I turned and walked as steadily as possible to Zak, who’s concerned face mirrored mine. “Don’t worry about that guy Zak” I reassured him in my calmest voice, “just a misunderstanding.” He nodded and we continued home and spent the remainder of the night in silence. As we settled into bed I couldn’t help but remember the pain I saw in those green eyes. I couldn’t help but remember everything we’d been through and I drifted off to sleep with the knowledge that I’d see him tomorrow.
** Flashback 2 years ago **
“Grace Abbot, you are the most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen,” Harry laughed at me as I attempted to wash the paint off my face. We’d been painting my bedroom and inevitably we’d gotten into a very heated paint war. There was nothing beautiful about the colorful streaks that lined my face. As I washed the paint away, the tender scar tissues just now forming over my wounds became visible, and Harry’s smile vanished. His sudden silence frightened me and I turned off the faucet to face him. I could usually read Harry extremely well, considering we’d grown up together, but this time I couldn’t decipher the look on his perfect face.
“What’s wrong?” I asked worriedly, still searching his face. He didn’t answer, but only stepped closer to me. We’d been close before but never like this, had the heat between us never existed until now? “Styles, what-“
“Shhhh” he said and he pressed a long finger to my lips. “Let me say something,” he whispered moving that finger to push away stray strands of my hair. He softly traced the scars on my face, and we both winced in pain, for different reasons. “I mean it Grace, you’re beautiful” he said, his warm breath filling my senses. It was a familiar mix of mint gum and the beer we’d drank while painting. I opened my mouth to protest but he eyed me down, forcing my words down my throat. “I wish you would tell me who did this to you. I can protect you my love.”
He’d said my love, like I was his. In a way I always felt like I belonged to him, but could never admit it. “Let me protect you Grace. Let me make you smile and paint your room for you and pick you up for dates at night. Let me love you.” His words were jumbles, his voice was shaking, the hand he held my face with was sweaty and I could almost hear his heart beating. It was strange because Harry was a ladies’ man, he never got nervous.
“I do let you love me Styles. You’re my best friend, how could I not?” I looked at him confused, naively.
“No Grace. I’m in love with you,” he said softly. His eyes were filled with gentle sincerity, and I had no choice but to believe what he said. The words hung between us in the silence. I wanted to say it back, I wanted him to know that I was in love with him too, I always had been, but what was the point? I was leaving tonight for London and he deserved to love someone who could be there for him.
“Harry I.. I don’t know..” I stuttered over my words. I wanted to say it back, but I just couldn’t.
“It’s alright Grace, I understand if you don't feel the same. I just needed you to know that. Call me tomorrow so we can finish painting your room ok?” he said quickly and walked out, slamming the door behind him.
“I love you too” I whispered into the echo of the empty room.
** End Flashback **
I woke the next morning with a jolt. It was still raining out and I could barely tell what time it was. Zak’s spot in bed was empty which meant he’d already left for work, meaning it had to be past 10. I grabbed my phone and looked at the time, 11. “Shit” I muttered jumping out of bed. 45 minutes left until everything would change.
“Are you really here?” he asked after a minute of silence.
“Yeah, I guess so” I laughed awkwardly. What do you say to someone who you hadn’t seen in two years? Harry eyed me curiously and he opened his mouth as if to speak but stopped himself. I already knew what he was going to ask. “Listen, it’s really me, yes I’m really here. But you can’t tell anyone. Grace is gone ok? I can’t explain it to you, but I have a different life now and you need to forget you ever saw me. Get it Styles?” I expected him to be hurt, to hate who I’d become, to walk away, but instead he laughed. That just made me angrier, “What? What is funny about this? You have no idea how much danger you are putting me and yourself and Zak in just by talking to me!” I spat at him, trying to keep my voice low so Zak wouldn’t overhear.
At my mention of Zak’s name Harry’s smirk dropped from his face and his eyes lost the amused light that had been there before. “Who’s Zak? Your new toy? Are you just gonna run away from him too?” he hissed at me, the short temper I knew him to have leaking out. The pain in his eyes was too much for me to bear. I wanted to tell him, I wanted him to know why. I took out a pen from bag and grabbed his hand. The size contrast between my anorexic fingers and his enormous callused hand was surprising, but I tried not to let him see that on my face. I jotted down the only safe address I could think of on the inside of his palm.
“What is-“ he started to ask but I cut him off.
“It’ll really be better for you if you don’t ask questions. Be at that address tomorrow at quarter to 12 and don’t say anything to anyone.” I said quickly “Now go. Go home and don’t try to look for me and don’t you dare follow me Styles” I warned. With that I turned and walked as steadily as possible to Zak, who’s concerned face mirrored mine. “Don’t worry about that guy Zak” I reassured him in my calmest voice, “just a misunderstanding.” He nodded and we continued home and spent the remainder of the night in silence. As we settled into bed I couldn’t help but remember the pain I saw in those green eyes. I couldn’t help but remember everything we’d been through and I drifted off to sleep with the knowledge that I’d see him tomorrow.
** Flashback 2 years ago **
“Grace Abbot, you are the most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen,” Harry laughed at me as I attempted to wash the paint off my face. We’d been painting my bedroom and inevitably we’d gotten into a very heated paint war. There was nothing beautiful about the colorful streaks that lined my face. As I washed the paint away, the tender scar tissues just now forming over my wounds became visible, and Harry’s smile vanished. His sudden silence frightened me and I turned off the faucet to face him. I could usually read Harry extremely well, considering we’d grown up together, but this time I couldn’t decipher the look on his perfect face.
“What’s wrong?” I asked worriedly, still searching his face. He didn’t answer, but only stepped closer to me. We’d been close before but never like this, had the heat between us never existed until now? “Styles, what-“
“Shhhh” he said and he pressed a long finger to my lips. “Let me say something,” he whispered moving that finger to push away stray strands of my hair. He softly traced the scars on my face, and we both winced in pain, for different reasons. “I mean it Grace, you’re beautiful” he said, his warm breath filling my senses. It was a familiar mix of mint gum and the beer we’d drank while painting. I opened my mouth to protest but he eyed me down, forcing my words down my throat. “I wish you would tell me who did this to you. I can protect you my love.”
He’d said my love, like I was his. In a way I always felt like I belonged to him, but could never admit it. “Let me protect you Grace. Let me make you smile and paint your room for you and pick you up for dates at night. Let me love you.” His words were jumbles, his voice was shaking, the hand he held my face with was sweaty and I could almost hear his heart beating. It was strange because Harry was a ladies’ man, he never got nervous.
“I do let you love me Styles. You’re my best friend, how could I not?” I looked at him confused, naively.
“No Grace. I’m in love with you,” he said softly. His eyes were filled with gentle sincerity, and I had no choice but to believe what he said. The words hung between us in the silence. I wanted to say it back, I wanted him to know that I was in love with him too, I always had been, but what was the point? I was leaving tonight for London and he deserved to love someone who could be there for him.
“Harry I.. I don’t know..” I stuttered over my words. I wanted to say it back, but I just couldn’t.
“It’s alright Grace, I understand if you don't feel the same. I just needed you to know that. Call me tomorrow so we can finish painting your room ok?” he said quickly and walked out, slamming the door behind him.
“I love you too” I whispered into the echo of the empty room.
** End Flashback **
I woke the next morning with a jolt. It was still raining out and I could barely tell what time it was. Zak’s spot in bed was empty which meant he’d already left for work, meaning it had to be past 10. I grabbed my phone and looked at the time, 11. “Shit” I muttered jumping out of bed. 45 minutes left until everything would change.
Notes
I went on a bit of writing spree today!! Sorry I just have a lot of ideas for this story! haha.Keep leaving feedback and rating it, it means a ton!! Thanks guys :)
5/31/13