Mistreated
Epilogue - Part 1
Thursday August 16th, 2018 (4 Years Later)
Iris’s POV:
“Mia?”
“Nah.”
“Grayson?”
“No.”
“What about Esperanza?”
“Harry, that’s a Spanish name,” I laughed.
“Your point?”
I shook my head at him, small sniggers still fleeing my lips, “We are as white as white people can get.”
“True,” he hummed in agreement. “Delaney?”
“Harry,” I playfully rolled my eyes. “I haven’t even peed on the stick yet.”
He chuckled and waved his hand impatiently, “Well come on, Woman. What are you waiting for?”
“Um, I don’t know,” I said sarcastically as I placed my chin between my thumb and index finger. “Maybe a full bladder.”
He smirked and pointed at the toilet I just so happen to be sitting on, “If you don’t have to pee yet, then why are you already sitting on the loo?”
“For the same reason you’re sitting on edge of the tub with the laptop searching for baby names,” I laughed.
“Solid point,” he nodded. He became silent for a minute, staring at me with furrowed brows. “How do you not have to pee yet? I bought you a thirty-two ounce soda at the movies for a reason,” he grinned cheekily, showing off his best feature: his dimples. Okay, third best feature. His first two are his pearly white smile and his hypnotizing eyes.
I began fiddling with the pregnancy test in my hands, “Maybe I’m shy when I pee. Do you really have to be in here?”
“You are definitely not shy when it comes to this,” he stated smugly as his hands pointed towards me. “Besides, you leave in the middle of sex to pee.”
Ah, sex. I never thought I would enjoy such intimate actions after Scott, but Harry has proven me wrong. I guess the hard part, the stinging sensation, was already done and over with, thanks to Scott, but Harry still was and is as gentle as ever. We like to take it slow, just basking in each other’s presence and enjoying every ounce of pleasure we give one another.
Our first time was actually at Harry’s house, in his bed, just like when we had dry sex on his nineteenth birthday. This time, his mom and sister were gone for a “girl’s weekend,” but I have a feeling Harry had asked them to leave. He had this really nice date planned out for us: he cooked me dinner, he baked me some brownies, and we cuddled and watched a movie. Next thing I know, we were making out on the couch, and one thing led to another which led us to his room. I’ll cherish that day forever.
The sex is mind-blowing really, but it took me forever to get comfortable with it. I had to start seeing Harry’s therapist to vent about everything. It felt really great to speak with someone besides Harry and Perrie about it, and before I knew it, the weight of the world was being lifted off of my shoulders. She helped me realize that I trust Harry with everything, and that nothing would ever happen as long as I was in his arms. I’m safe with him, and I have no reason to fear those past events will happen again. Now, I’m finally here, four years later, in normalcy. Let me just tell you, it feels amazing.
“But I don’t pee right in front of you,” I argued.
“Do to.” It amazes me how we still act like children…
I placed the stick onto the counter next to me and crossed my arms, “Name one time.”
“Okay,” he closed the laptop and placed it onto the floor next to his feet. He placed each of his arms on either one of his legs and intertwined his fingers together, all while looking deep in thought. “You’ve done it while I was in the shower,” he recalled.
“But that’s different,” I rolled my eyes. “You can’t hear me with the shower running.”
He raised his brows, “Or can I?”
“You’re disgusting,” I mumbled. “Why can’t I pee in peace?”
He let out an exhale of defeat and stood to his feet, “Fine.” He grabbed the laptop and gave me a small bow before walking out of the bathroom, closing the door behind him as he did so. Once a dork, always a dork.
Finally. I don’t think I could’ve held it a second longer. I grabbed the stick from the counter and examined it for a few seconds further before I held it underneath my bottom. I feel sort of awkward doing this since girls aren’t usually the ones who have to aim.
Just when I was about to release my bladder, I heard Harry suggest another name, “Colton?”
I groaned, “Harry, are you sitting against the door?”
“Maybe.”
“Go away,” I whined.
“I could come back in,” he threatened.
“My fiancé is a pig,” I grumbled.
“What was that?”
I shook my head as if he could see me through the door, faking a smile as I did so. “Oh nothing,” I sung.
“I’ll let that slide today,” he joked. “April?”
I laughed at the Spring name, “You really want to be like my mom and name our kids after things associated with nature?”
“I don’t see the problem with that, Meadow,” he said my middle name slowly and teasingly. Jerk.
“I’d rather not put a theme on our children’s names,” I started talking loudly, hoping Harry couldn’t hear me urinating. I’m just uncomfortable with the sound. Maybe it’s a hearing thing, or maybe I just really am shy.
“Aww, why not?” he asked, faking his disappointment.
“Just keep scrolling through names,” I giggled.
“Okay. How about Cactus?”
I began laughing so hard I was snorting. “Is that actually something you read or are you making that up?”
“It’s literally on this page,” he chuckled. “So is Cable and Ice.”
“Those are…” I paused, trying to come up with a word for it. “Interesting?”
“Apparently naming your baby, Baby is normal on this website too,” he added.
I giggled at his sentence, but my laughter faded within seconds. I stared at the stick in my hand. Now’s the waiting. My heart started beating a hundred miles a minute as my mind raced with thoughts. I tried shaking them off, grabbing a few pieces of toilet paper to set the stick on before setting them onto the counter. Lastly, I finished my business and washed my hands once I was done with that.
“Finally,” Harry grinned when I opened the bathroom door. He stood to his feet and turned to me with his laptop in his hand, his smile falling once he saw I looked upset. “Hey, what’s wrong?” he placed his free hand on my shoulder and lightly massaged it.
I didn’t answer him, only burying my head into his chest as I engulfed him in a side hug. He reached to his right and placed the computer on the desk in the room before his arms snaked around my waist to hold me tighter to the front of him. We stood like that for a while with him just rubbing his fingertips up and down my spine to comfort me.
“Do you think we’ll be good parents?” I mumbled into his chest.
“What?” he cupped my face and pulled me away from him a little, tilting my head up so his eyes could meet mine. “Of course we will. Come here,” he sighed and took my hands in his before guiding me to our bed. He scooted backwards until his back was against the headboard of the bed, and then he held his arms out for me to join him. I crawled over to him and sat next to him, placing my legs over his lap and resting my head onto his shoulder as he wrapped his arms around me.
It was a while before he finally spoke again. “Why are you having doubts, Angel?”
“I just worry that because of what happened with us, we don’t exactly know how to be real parents,” I admitted as I traced circles onto the thin fabric of his t-shirt.
“We’ve both had that real parent experience,” he said as he began rubbing my arm. “At some point,” he added with a mumble. “But you have to agree, you and I have a great idea on what better role models are like, right? I think as long as we’re not beating and neglecting our children, we should be just fine.”
I giggled, “I suppose so.”
“My point is…” he paused and cradled my face with his big hands, pulling my head back a bit as he did so. “You and I will never be like my father, and how your parents were. We will never do anything even remotely close to it. In fact, we’ll probably spoil our kids rotten.”
“We’ll probably spoil them too much,” I waved my eyebrows once, earning an energetic nod of agreement from Harry. I sighed, “Aren’t we setting a bad example though? I mean, we’re not even married yet.”
He stroked my cheekbones with the pads of his thumbs, “So we did things a little backwards, and this possible pregnancy wasn’t exactly planned, but that doesn’t make us bad examples.”
“What if...” I paused and took a breath. I bit my lip as I changed my position, straddling Harry’s lap so my legs were bent on either side of him. I wrapped my arms around his neck, “What if our baby is born with my hearing or worse?”
He smiled and placed his left hand on my waist. “Then we’ll teach them…” he held up his right hand and signed “A”, “S”, and “L”. “American sign language.”
My lips curved into a smile before they flattened again, “What if they get some other disability like down syndrome or something?”
“I wouldn’t love them any less,” he shrugged, his answer making my heart flutter.
“What if they are transgender?”
“I believe they are allowed to be whoever they want to be,” he stated, finally resting his other hand on my waist. “If they want to be a girl, then so be it. If they want to be a boy, I’d accept that too. No matter what, they’re still our child, and I’ll love them always.”
“What if they get four nipples, like you?” I smirked.
He chuckled and poked my cheek, “As long as they get their mum’s cheekbones, I’d be perfectly fine with it.” Mum…
“Do you think they’ll speak with your accent or mine?” I furrowed my brows as I pondered the question.
He scrunched his face in concentration as well, “I honestly don’t have an answer for that one.” I laughed at his response, causing him to laugh as well. “Maybe both? I don’t know. I think your sexy accent would be easier for them.”
“You think my accent is sexy, eh?” I wiggled my brows at him.
“Duh,” he crossed his eyes, making me giggle.
I leaned down and gave him a quick peck on the lips before removing myself from him and the bed. I began walking towards the bathroom to get the test and stopped when I spotted the laptop. I face palmed when I saw what webpage he was on, “Harry, this website gives you the ability to submit your own creation of names. No wonder Cactus, Baby, Ice, and whatever the other one was, is on here.”
“Cable,” he helped me fill in the blanks. “There’s no way that’s truth though.”
“One of the names is A B C D E,” I said with a hint of sass.
He laughed and joined me by the computer, leaning his chin on my shoulder as he read the screen. “No, that’s Ab-ca-d,” he tried sounding out the letters into a word.
“No,” I held the word, arguing back. “That’s the alphabet.”
“Last time I checked, the alphabet has twenty-one more letters than that,” he rasped.
I turned around to face him, shooting him a glare, “You know what I mean, Smartass. If you think that’s such a great name, you should just add it to your tattoo collection.”
He placed his hand on his chest and stumbled backwards a bit, pretending to be taken aback, “Low blow.”
“Aww, I’m kidding, Babe,” I cooed and pulled him into a hug. “I love your tattoos.” Harry has to have somewhere over forty tattoos now. I like to call him my little tattoo addict because I swear he just can’t stop. I guess he likes the thrill of the sting or something. I don’t understand it one bit. I didn’t enjoy that part at all when I got my tattoos four years ago, and I refuse to get anymore.
I rolled Harry’s sleeve up his shoulder a bit and twisted his arm slightly to reveal many of his tattoos. I searched for my favorite one, the “HI” one, and placed a kiss to it. “Especially this one,” I murmured against his skin.
“That’s my favorite one too,” he smiled, popping his beautiful dimples out before he leant down to kiss me. As he pulled away, he intertwined my fingers with his, “You ready?”
I took a deep breath and nodded. I wrapped my free arm around the same arm of his I’m already tangled with before we walked into the bathroom. We both gazed into each other’s eyes with big smiles plastered to our faces. I squeezed his hand a little tighter, him returning the gesture before we both leaned over the counter to look at the stick…
Saturday August 18th 2018 (2 Days Later)
“You look beautiful, El,” I beamed as I smoothed out the wrinkles in her wedding dress. Her dress is a beautiful strapless white gown that is tight until the bottom of her hips, the rest of it flowing down and behind her. The top part of the dress is lacy, and a silver snowflake pattern formed into a line is on the stomach of the dress. On the right side of her dress, just below her hip, is a slit that reveals her right leg and her white heels with bows on them. The dress fits who she is: pretty, elegant, and playful.
“Well, you guys look pretty amazing as well,” she gushed, eyeing each of us through the full body mirror she’s standing before.
Perrie, Sophia, Charlotte, and I are all Eleanor’s bridesmaids, Perrie being the Maid of Honor. Eleanor’s wedding colors are navy blue and white, so the four of us found the perfect matching navy blue bridesmaid dresses to wear. Each dress is short, ending about four inches above the knee, and somewhat fits our personalities or styles.
Sophia’s dress is strapless and has sort of a crinkly look to it. The thing she loves the most about it is the big bow that sits between her breasts and covers each boob. Perrie’s dress has sleeves that cover her shoulders, and the whole dress holds a lacey waved pattern, the shoulders of the dress being slightly see-through. My dress is see-through from the top of my breasts to my one inch straps and ending one/fourth of the way down my back. The top of my dress is tight while the rest flows down, the ends of my dress forming a crimping pattern.
Last but not least is Charlotte Tomlinson AKA Lottie AKA Louis’s little sister. Lottie really wanted to be part of the ceremony, and Louis just couldn’t say no to her, not that he wanted to. We all have met Lottie a few times, and we love her to death. She is the one sibling of Louis’s that Eleanor is closest to and adores unconditionally, so I’m not surprised that she is a bridesmaid. Lottie’s dress, like mine, is see-through from the top of her breasts to her shoulder length sleeves and ending a quarter of the way down her back. She has a couple wave patterns and scrunches at the top of her dress, the rest of her dress just flowing down.
To top off all of our dresses, we all have fancy updos and carry bouquets of white blossoms. Eleanor’s bouquet was bigger than ours and had a few blossoms that were painted blue just for her.
“Are you excited?” Sophia came up from behind Eleanor and rubbed El’s bare shoulders.
El smiled widely and nodded her head in an eager manor, “I’m so ready to be Mrs. Eleanor Tomlinson. I’ve been ready since he proposed.”
“Aww,” I cooed. Those two have been in love since long before I met them, so I’m happy to finally see them tying the knot. Fun fact: they choice today to get married because they thought it’d be cool considering its 8/18/18. They still are and always will be goobers.
“El? Are you guys serving sauerkraut at all tonight?” Perrie asked.
All of us busted up laughing and turned to her with puzzled looks, but it was obvious she wasn’t joking. She chewed at her thumbnail and bounced her leg nervously while she sat in a chair on the other side of the room.
“Ew, why would I want to serve that?” Eleanor shuddered at the thought of it. “It smells so bad.”
“I know,” Perrie sighed. “But I’m craving it really badly.”
“That stuff tastes horrible too,” Lottie scrunched her face and shook her head. “That’s the worst thing you could possibly crave.”
“I can’t help it,” Perrie pressed her lips into a line as she looked down at her lap. The thing is, the corners of her mouth were twitching upward, but she was trying to hide the smile.
Sophia gasped, holding her hand to her chest as her smile parted, “Oh my god, are you pregnant again?” That’s when I realized Perrie wasn’t looking down at her lap. She placed her hand onto her stomach, gently rubbing it before she gave Sophia a nod. Eleanor, Lottie, and Sophia all shared great excitement, jumping up and down with flailing arms as they screamed.
I laughed at the squealing girls as I made my way over to Perrie. I wrapped my arms around her and leaned the side of my head against her’s, “Congratulations. Now little Harley will be a big brother.”
Ah, Harley: possibly the cutest little boy on the planet. He’s got the prettiest blue eyes, like his mommy’s but a little darker. His skin is just as pale as Perrie’s as well, not even tinted from Zayn’s skin tone. There’s an odd thing about him: he has light brown hair. Zayn has really dark brown hair that's almost black and Perrie is blonde, so we have no idea where Harley's tan-ish/brown hair came from. We came to the conclusion that God chose the in between shade since he didn’t seem to look like Zayn’s baby at all. We often tease Zayn, asking him who the real baby daddy is, but it’s definitely him.
Harley is only a year old now, being born a year after Perrie and Zayn’s wedding. Harry and I like to take our opportunities in babysitting him, but it rarely happens seeming as both Perrie and Zayn’s families want to see him too. Then there’s the rest of the group who’d like to see him as well. He’s a popular little infant. He’s at the wedding today, probably being passed around Lou’s family in the crowd.
“Thank you,” Perrie chirped as we pulled away from each other.
“I’m so happy for you!” Eleanor made her way over to Perrie and held her tight.
This gave me the chance to turn away from them and reveal my true frown. I wouldn’t allow myself to hold this feeling for longer than a few seconds. Today is a good day, a day of celebration, and I will not feel sorry for myself during it.
Luckily, El’s father stepped into the room, preventing me from further sorrow. “Hey, Baby. It’s time.” I turned and genuinely smiled at her beaming face. Two of my best friends are getting married.
I sat at the table by myself, watching the father/daughter dance El and her dad shared on the dance floor. The boys were all standing near the dance floor watching Eleanor in awe, and I could tell they were teasing Lou a bit as they stared. Ed Sheeran and the guys from 5SOS are joined with the boys, occasionally waving their hands to the song and jokingly whistling at El. She and her father would just giggle at their actions.
I couldn’t help but smile at the ruckus. This is a regular thing for us. Ever since Harry and the boys had gotten noticed by Simon Cowell from YouTube videos posted of them at the talent show, they’ve become pretty famous. The fame was stressful on all of us at first, but we somehow managed to make it work. Harry and I have had similar and worse problems, so we knew this wouldn’t break us. I wish I could say the same for Sophia and Liam…
The girls and I would have a Girl’s Night every week where we’d vent about fans, paparazzi, false stories and accusations, and the boys being around less. Week by week, Eleanor, Perrie and I only seemed to gain more confidence in our relationships while Sophia was crumbling before us. We tried so hard to help her by taking her out to distract her, occasionally taking her on trips to see the boys, and getting her drunk a lot. Nothing ever seemed to help. The stress was getting to be too much for her.
Fans were calling her an ugly gold-digger, and the paparazzi would announce her “pregnancy.” She couldn’t go anywhere without being verbally abused by girls or employees in places like grocery stores. She’d get jealous when a girl would ask for a picture with me, El, and/or Pez, but not her. While all of this was happening, the boys were on tour. It was hard enough for Sophia to be so far from Liam, but it was too much knowing he couldn’t always pick up the phone for her and comfort her. They constantly fought about it, but it wasn’t like Liam could do anything about it other than to try and FaceTime her more. It was no use.
After about six months of this, she couldn’t take it anymore. She left him. The girls and I sympathized her, but we felt just as bad for Liam. They cared for each other a lot, but it wasn’t enough to carry them through their struggles.
They remain friends, but I can tell it’s hard for both of them. Especially since when we were walking down the aisle, Sophia got paired with Niall and Liam with Lottie. They still talk here and there, but Sophia has decided to remain focused on her schooling and not worry about it. There’s no telling whether they’ll ever get back together or not, but there’s no denying their feelings are still there. They still look at each other the same way they did four years ago: with definite care.
Just like Sophia, Eleanor and I have continued doing schooling. We do it all online so we don’t have to be bombarded by fans every time we’d go to school. Perrie, on the other hand, has taken a job in the music industry just as the boys have. She sings in a band called Little Mix. I’ve met all of her bandmates, and they’re great girls. Good for her, right?
The only thing I’ve gotten paid for in four years is to pose on the cover of two magazines. People have seen the scars on my wrist along with my “Fighter” tattoo, so I eventually announced my bullying story. I said nothing of my family in order to protect them. I don’t need them criticized for something they’ve already apologized and I have forgiven them for. I spoke of being sexually abused, but I never got into details about it, not wanting to sound like I was desperate for attention. I also never used names, protecting the identities of those who have pained me.
I was told I’m an inspiration, having been bullied and sexually abused, yet here I am. I had cut myself and wanted to die, but I’m “living the dream” now. So I got a place on the Seventeen magazine cover, leaning my head onto the hand of my scarred wrist and showing off my old wounds and tattoo. After that, I got a place on the W magazine: the picture Harry had not approved of. I was topless and braless for this shoot, but they only took the picture just above my breasts. They wanted to get a shot of my heartbeat tattoo, and they wanted my fighter tattoo added to it. My pose was almost as if I were stretching. My head was facing to the side as my hands hovered over my shoulders, wrists facing the camera as my fingers curled. Harry wasn’t fond of the fact that my boobs were being shown to all of the employees, but he understood that I didn’t want to rely on him for money all of the time. “It was a onetime thing,” I’d tell him, and I meant it. I would never flash in a room full of people like that again. To say, "It was uncomfortable," would be an understatement.
Eleanor is now unemployed considering her mom is just happy she’s “famous” for being engaged, now married, to Lou. I guess her mom just wanted her to be a success since she’s the only child in the family.
Liz finally came out and told the world she was pretending to be Elizabeth Foster at our high school, hiding her true identity of Wendy Beckett. She still has us call her Liz, saying she’s grown to love that name more than her own. Her dreams had come true, and she now owns her own fashion company: Blizzard. Occasionally, Liz asks Eleanor to fill in for models at her fashion shows, and Eleanor loves to help her out considering Liz doesn’t boss her around like her mom had.
Liz has remained close friends with us after all of these years. In fact, she’s somewhere here at this wedding. Today, because the girls and I are well-known for our relationships with the One Direction boys, Liz designs the dresses we wear out in public. We proudly model for the paparazzi in her creations and tell reporters that it’s her designs we wear. She’s a great woman, and I’m so happy to have her in our life.
I sighed happily as my eyes scanned the crowd for the girls. My blissfulness had faded once I noticed Lottie and Sophia cooing at baby Harley who was being held by Perrie. I looked down at my stomach, disappointed with my empty uterus. I know I shouldn’t be sad that I’m not pregnant, but the look of letdown Harry had expressed when we saw the negative sign bummed me out.
I began to wonder; what if I can’t ever get pregnant? I know we haven’t been trying or anything, but the thoughts clouded in my mind as I thought back to the rape. Maybe Scott had damaged something, and now I can’t carry my own child. That’s something I never thought about, and now having this little “scare” concerned me. I’d like to have children someday with Harry, but what if I can’t? Will he hate me?
“Hey Beautiful,” a raspy voice breathed in my ear.
Harry pressed his lips to my cheek before standing in front of me. His hypnotizing smile fell when he realized I was gloomy, and he held out his hand for me. I sighed and took his hand, allowing him to pull me to my feet and intertwine our fingers. He led me to the middle of the dance floor where all of the guests were slow dancing now. He placed one of his hands against my lower back, holding me very close to him as his other hand tangled with one of mine. I placed my free hand onto his shoulder and began to sway to the music, following his lead.
“I’m guessing you heard the news,” he forced a smile, and I nodded. “Why are you so sad, Angel? I mean, we could actually try this time,” he shrugged and laughed slightly at his words.
I let out a little puff of giggles before sighing again, “Do you think that I’ll be able to even get pregnant, you know, after the whole Scott thing happening?”
He furrowed his brows, but not in confusion. It seemed as if he had only just thought of this himself. “It depends on how much he…” his voice trailed off. I know what he means: how much damage did Scott do? It also depends on how my body healed and scarred from such a traumatic event.
“It’d be my fault,” I frowned and looked down at our feet. “I didn’t fight hard enough. I gave up because I felt I deserved it. I should’ve fought harder and maybe it wouldn’t have happened.”
“Mercy,” he brought his hand from my back up to cup my face. His eyes filled with worry as he gazed into mine. “Even if that were true, even if we couldn’t have our own baby, I want you to know that I would never blame you for that. Sure, it’d be amazing to have a child of our own someday, but if we can’t, we can’t. Don’t be so hard on yourself, Angel. It’s not your doing. It’s not like you asked him to do that to you. It happened, and you were fragile. I could never blame you.”
I nodded and buried my head into his chest, not wanting people to notice the unhappiness I feel. This is supposed to be a cherishing day, but I can’t help the thoughts that are creeping in my mind. I shouldn’t be like this though; it’s not fair to El and Lou. Yet I remain feeling these mixed emotions while my arms are wrapped around Harry’s waist as his are wrapped around my shoulders and neck, holding me close to him as we swayed to the music.
“We’re not even married yet, you know?” Harry chucked, attempting to lighten up the mood. “In a way, I’m kind of glad you’re not pregnant because now we can just focus on our wedding which, dare I say, will be better than this one.”
A snort slipped from my lips as I tried to stifle back my laughter. “Oh most definitely. This wedding is so lame,” I looked up at him and giggled.
He nodded, “Exactly. Ours will be perfect. The ceremony will be done indoors, just before sundown. Then, the reception will be outdoors, under the stars, and we’ll have lots of lights. I remember you saying how much you've dreamed of a wedding like that. Oh, and the guys and I, we’re not wearing suspenders,” Harry rolled his eyes as he tugged on one of the straps of the white suspenders he’s wearing.
Lou thought it’d be cool if all of the guys wore navy blue button up shirts with suspenders. I think that’s a strange wedding outfit, but whatever, it’s his wedding.
“Aww,” I teased and fisted his suspenders. “Why not? I think you look very handsome in them.”
“Well there’s no denying that,” his voice was overly cocky, but I knew he was only kidding. “I just happen to think we’re a bit more mature than them.”
“You’re a bit more mature than who, Haz?” Louis asked from behind him, his arms crossed as he anticipated Harry’s answer. Harry pulled away from me to face Lou, but he kept our hands intertwined as they dangled between us.
“Uh, than Perrie and Zayn, duh,” Harry stated as if he were pointing out the obvious. I brought my hand to my mouth to cover up my smile that was struggling to hold back laughter. Harry noticed this action and tried to avoid eye contact with me so he wouldn’t lose it either.
Lou grinned and shook his head at us, “Nice cover up, but I heard the whole thing.”
Harry turned to me with fake disappointment, “When we’re talking shit on someone, you’re supposed to warn me if they’re nearby.”
“I’m pretty sure you’re the lookout since you’re a tree,” I argued, making Louis laugh.
“Oh yeah, you two are way more sophisticated,” Louis said with sarcasm.
“Totally,” I joked. I released myself from Harry’s grip and walked over to Louis to wrap my arms around his neck. I pulled him close to me, and he returned the hug by snaking his arms around my waist. “Congrats Lou. It’s about damn time,” I laughed.
He pulled away but held me at arm’s length, “Are you kidding me? You and Haz have been engaged longer than El and I.”
“Well we have our reasons for that,” I shrugged.
We do. Harry and I got engaged around the time One Direction started becoming a hit. We decided to hold off on wedding plans till we were used to the pressure of the paparazzi and the fans. We just wanted to be sure we were strong enough for this. At first, we struggled a bit, just as the rest of them did. I sort of think I struggled the most because Harry is the only person I’ve really ever depended on and he wasn’t always there. It turns out, he was feeling just as disappointed with it as I was. He loves his career, but it sucked that he couldn’t share the experience with me all the time.
That’s why we wound up getting a place together. This way we are spending more time with each other whenever he’s home. It’s also calming knowing the place smells like him, especially his side of the bed. Whenever he’s on tour, I usually send him away with one of my scarves so he can have my scent with him as well. The other boys thought it was strange at first, but they started doing that as well. You can only imagine how crazy Niall thought all of them were.
Once we got passed that obstacle, Sophia and Liam broke up, so we were being there for them. Then, Perrie and Zayn were having their wedding, so yet again, we decided to wait. Then, Perrie and Zayn had a baby and were completely exhausted. Now, it’s Louis and Eleanor’s wedding. We’ve decided that for sure we’ll be getting married soon. Harry says Lou will just have to keep his junk in his pants until after our wedding. Surprisingly, it seems its Zayn and Perrie who need to talk about birth control or something.
“Plus, you’re just really slow,” Harry added as he patted Louis’s back. “You and El have been together since Sophomore Year. I have no idea what took you so long.”
Louis exaggerated a sigh. “What was I thinking?” he asked rhetorically in a humorous tone.
Just then, I felt a tap on my shoulder. I turned around to find blue eyes looking into mine. A smile plastered Niall’s face as he held a hand out for me, “Would you like to dance, Flower?”
I turned to Harry, my eyes pleading him to allow me. It’s not that he gets jealous of Niall anymore, but I can tell it makes him feel better knowing I’m still looking out for his feelings. He nodded in approval before turning back to Louis to start another conversation about the flavor of the wedding cake we’ll be eating later.
“Why yes I would, Porky,” I curtsied before taking his hand. Yes, we do still use our nicknames for each other, and I’m sure it’ll be like that for a long time, if not forever. Since we were already on the dance floor, Niall cupped his hand around mine and placed his other hand on my back. I placed my free hand on his shoulder, and swayed with him like I had been with Harry not that long ago. The thing about Niall is that he doesn’t have the patience for slow songs, so he is rocking us in a fast pace. Such a dork.
“I’m surprised you didn’t join that conversation with them about the cake,” I teased Niall, referring to the topic Harry and Lou were discussing.
He shrugged, “Maybe the fact that I haven’t seen you in like weeks is more important.”
“Weeks, eh?” I raised my brows at him and chuckled. “You didn’t seem to mind as much after your year round tour.”
“Did to,” he argued. “Your place was the first place I went when we got back.”
“And may I remind you what you did?” I smirked. “You went straight to the kitchen to raid our cabinets.”
He playfully rolled his eyes, “It was a long trip, and I was hungry.”
“You guys were in the same state for your last show,” I snickered. “So what’s up, Nialler? Is there something you wanted to talk about?”
He sighed, “How do you always know these things?”
“Good instincts,” I replied without hesitation. In reality, I’ve just known Niall long enough to tell when he’s trying to get me to speak with him. “So talk to me.”
“I uh, I met someone,” he started, but I interrupted him with an “oooooo.” He shook his head at me, “This is why I didn’t want to tell the boys, you know?”
I brought my lips between my teeth and giggled. “Oh, sorry,” I took my hand off his shoulder and gestured that I was locking my mouth shut.
He gave me a slight nod, “Thank you. Anyways, I’m thinking about taking her on a date, and I’m pretty out of practice in that area, so I was wondering if you’d help me out.”
“No problem,” I gushed. I feel pretty flattered knowing he seeks my help over the other girls, but it seems all of the boys have felt that way. Liam asked me for help when he and Sophia were fighting, Zayn asked me for help planning his anniversaries with Perrie, Louis asked me for help picking out gifts for Eleanor, and now Niall needs my help with this mystery woman. Harry tends to go to Perrie considering he needs another girl’s opinion like the other guys do.
“Can I have everyone’s attention?” Louis’s mother asked into a microphone at the front of the room. The music was stopped and everyone turned to see what she had to say. “It’s time for Mr. and Mrs. Louis Tomlinson to cut the cake.”
Just then, Niall threw his fists in the air and shouted, “WHOO!” Laughter roared throughout the room knowing Niall is definitely a food lover.
I grabbed Niall’s arm and guided him over to the long rectangular table that holds Eleanor and Louis’s wedding cake. By the time we got over there, just about everyone else in the room was circling the table. Louis and Eleanor were in the very center, carefully removing the top tier of their wedding cake. I guess it’s tradition to save the top tier, keep it in your freezer, and eat it on your one year anniversary. Perrie and Zayn told us it surprisingly stays fresh and yummy.
Once they removed the top, Lou’s mom and stepfather carefully packaged it up. Louis handed Eleanor the cake cutter and put his hand on her grip to help her cut the cake.
“Whoo, you cut that cake,” Ashton shouted them words of encouragement, causing people to chuckle. I watched as Louis whispered something in Eleanor’s ear while they cut into the cake. She reacted with a giggle and by reaching her arm behind her to slap his side. Knowing Louis, he said something dirty to her.
“That’ll be us soon.” I didn’t even have to turn around to know it was Harry who just said that. I’ve grown to memorize his voice, touch, smell…everything about him. He snaked his arms around me and rested his chin onto my shoulder. I hummed to his touch and leaned back against him as I hugged his arms that are around me.
We watched as Louis and Eleanor placed the piece of cake carefully onto a plate. They set the knife down onto the table and grabbed their own forks to eat the cake. Each of them scooped up some cake and shot each other cheeky grins. We knew what was coming.
Eleanor and Louis each simultaneously set their forks down and scooped up cake in their hands. Within seconds, they were smearing the goopy looking substance all over each other’s faces, sharing laughs as we all chuckled with them.
“We just won’t do that,” Harry confirmed.
“If you did, I’d have to kill you,” I joked as I shook my head against him.
He gasped, “You’d never do that.”
I turned in his arms and shook my head again, “Nah, I love you too much to do that.”
“Good,” he said sternly. He softened his features up and giggled a bit, “I love you too.”
“Good,” I said before pressing my lips to his.
“Okay you two, break it up,” Liz crouched under Harry and I’s arms so she could stand before us. Harry’s mouth parted as he let out slow shocked laughs, his eyes boring into the back of Liz’s head as she faces me. “I don’t know about you guys, but I’m not hungry for cake yet. That meal was filling. Let’s dance.”
“It seems like I’ve been living on the dance floor today,” I snorted. “But sure, sounds fun. Let’s go.” Liz and I locked arms, but before we even took a step towards the dance floor, I held out my other arm to Harry. He sighed. Pretending to be aggravated as he linked his arm with mine, but I could see the smile forming on his face.
We skipped over to the dance floor like the dorks we are. Of course, Louis had the DJ playing old school music, and the song that happened to be on was “Low” by Flo Rida. Good thing the kids here aren’t old enough to understand the words.
We are dancing harmlessly to the music seeming as that’s important now that kids are around. I threw my fists in the air and bounced to the music. Every now and then, Liz and I would share wide grins and bump our hips with each other. Harry did his normal goofy dances where he’d swing his arms in large slow circles as he held his head down. God, I love that weirdo.
Eventually, Liam had joined us, doing the robot and a chopping motion. Then there was Zayn and Perrie who were waving their arms around and rocking their heads to the music. Eleanor, Louis, and Sophia jumped in as well, doing their own silly dance moves as well, such as plugging their nose with one hand and wiggling their other hand as if they were swimming. Lastly, Niall came over and rocked back and forth as he held his plate of cake, nibbling at it here and there. At all of the “low, low, low, low, low, low, low, low” parts, we were all wiggling our feet as if we were squishing bugs while we’d lower ourselves into squatting positions.
Just like old times, we were all on the dance floor; minus the alcohol, other drugs, and slutty clothes. It almost felt like we were back in high school, and it made me feel younger. Then, suddenly 5SOS and Ed Sheeran joined us on the dance floor, sweeping us back into reality. Three and a half years of this, and I’m still not used to it. I love every single bit of it though.
As we continued to dance to other jams, I caught a glance of Harley being bounced on Lottie’s hip as she held him. That baby made me feel a little sad again, but I tried to ignore my feelings. Still, one thought remained in my mind: Will I ever be able to have a baby?
TO BE CONTINUED(;
STAY TUNED FOR PART 2 :D
Iris’s POV:
“Mia?”
“Nah.”
“Grayson?”
“No.”
“What about Esperanza?”
“Harry, that’s a Spanish name,” I laughed.
“Your point?”
I shook my head at him, small sniggers still fleeing my lips, “We are as white as white people can get.”
“True,” he hummed in agreement. “Delaney?”
“Harry,” I playfully rolled my eyes. “I haven’t even peed on the stick yet.”
He chuckled and waved his hand impatiently, “Well come on, Woman. What are you waiting for?”
“Um, I don’t know,” I said sarcastically as I placed my chin between my thumb and index finger. “Maybe a full bladder.”
He smirked and pointed at the toilet I just so happen to be sitting on, “If you don’t have to pee yet, then why are you already sitting on the loo?”
“For the same reason you’re sitting on edge of the tub with the laptop searching for baby names,” I laughed.
“Solid point,” he nodded. He became silent for a minute, staring at me with furrowed brows. “How do you not have to pee yet? I bought you a thirty-two ounce soda at the movies for a reason,” he grinned cheekily, showing off his best feature: his dimples. Okay, third best feature. His first two are his pearly white smile and his hypnotizing eyes.
I began fiddling with the pregnancy test in my hands, “Maybe I’m shy when I pee. Do you really have to be in here?”
“You are definitely not shy when it comes to this,” he stated smugly as his hands pointed towards me. “Besides, you leave in the middle of sex to pee.”
Ah, sex. I never thought I would enjoy such intimate actions after Scott, but Harry has proven me wrong. I guess the hard part, the stinging sensation, was already done and over with, thanks to Scott, but Harry still was and is as gentle as ever. We like to take it slow, just basking in each other’s presence and enjoying every ounce of pleasure we give one another.
Our first time was actually at Harry’s house, in his bed, just like when we had dry sex on his nineteenth birthday. This time, his mom and sister were gone for a “girl’s weekend,” but I have a feeling Harry had asked them to leave. He had this really nice date planned out for us: he cooked me dinner, he baked me some brownies, and we cuddled and watched a movie. Next thing I know, we were making out on the couch, and one thing led to another which led us to his room. I’ll cherish that day forever.
The sex is mind-blowing really, but it took me forever to get comfortable with it. I had to start seeing Harry’s therapist to vent about everything. It felt really great to speak with someone besides Harry and Perrie about it, and before I knew it, the weight of the world was being lifted off of my shoulders. She helped me realize that I trust Harry with everything, and that nothing would ever happen as long as I was in his arms. I’m safe with him, and I have no reason to fear those past events will happen again. Now, I’m finally here, four years later, in normalcy. Let me just tell you, it feels amazing.
“But I don’t pee right in front of you,” I argued.
“Do to.” It amazes me how we still act like children…
I placed the stick onto the counter next to me and crossed my arms, “Name one time.”
“Okay,” he closed the laptop and placed it onto the floor next to his feet. He placed each of his arms on either one of his legs and intertwined his fingers together, all while looking deep in thought. “You’ve done it while I was in the shower,” he recalled.
“But that’s different,” I rolled my eyes. “You can’t hear me with the shower running.”
He raised his brows, “Or can I?”
“You’re disgusting,” I mumbled. “Why can’t I pee in peace?”
He let out an exhale of defeat and stood to his feet, “Fine.” He grabbed the laptop and gave me a small bow before walking out of the bathroom, closing the door behind him as he did so. Once a dork, always a dork.
Finally. I don’t think I could’ve held it a second longer. I grabbed the stick from the counter and examined it for a few seconds further before I held it underneath my bottom. I feel sort of awkward doing this since girls aren’t usually the ones who have to aim.
Just when I was about to release my bladder, I heard Harry suggest another name, “Colton?”
I groaned, “Harry, are you sitting against the door?”
“Maybe.”
“Go away,” I whined.
“I could come back in,” he threatened.
“My fiancé is a pig,” I grumbled.
“What was that?”
I shook my head as if he could see me through the door, faking a smile as I did so. “Oh nothing,” I sung.
“I’ll let that slide today,” he joked. “April?”
I laughed at the Spring name, “You really want to be like my mom and name our kids after things associated with nature?”
“I don’t see the problem with that, Meadow,” he said my middle name slowly and teasingly. Jerk.
“I’d rather not put a theme on our children’s names,” I started talking loudly, hoping Harry couldn’t hear me urinating. I’m just uncomfortable with the sound. Maybe it’s a hearing thing, or maybe I just really am shy.
“Aww, why not?” he asked, faking his disappointment.
“Just keep scrolling through names,” I giggled.
“Okay. How about Cactus?”
I began laughing so hard I was snorting. “Is that actually something you read or are you making that up?”
“It’s literally on this page,” he chuckled. “So is Cable and Ice.”
“Those are…” I paused, trying to come up with a word for it. “Interesting?”
“Apparently naming your baby, Baby is normal on this website too,” he added.
I giggled at his sentence, but my laughter faded within seconds. I stared at the stick in my hand. Now’s the waiting. My heart started beating a hundred miles a minute as my mind raced with thoughts. I tried shaking them off, grabbing a few pieces of toilet paper to set the stick on before setting them onto the counter. Lastly, I finished my business and washed my hands once I was done with that.
“Finally,” Harry grinned when I opened the bathroom door. He stood to his feet and turned to me with his laptop in his hand, his smile falling once he saw I looked upset. “Hey, what’s wrong?” he placed his free hand on my shoulder and lightly massaged it.
I didn’t answer him, only burying my head into his chest as I engulfed him in a side hug. He reached to his right and placed the computer on the desk in the room before his arms snaked around my waist to hold me tighter to the front of him. We stood like that for a while with him just rubbing his fingertips up and down my spine to comfort me.
“Do you think we’ll be good parents?” I mumbled into his chest.
“What?” he cupped my face and pulled me away from him a little, tilting my head up so his eyes could meet mine. “Of course we will. Come here,” he sighed and took my hands in his before guiding me to our bed. He scooted backwards until his back was against the headboard of the bed, and then he held his arms out for me to join him. I crawled over to him and sat next to him, placing my legs over his lap and resting my head onto his shoulder as he wrapped his arms around me.
It was a while before he finally spoke again. “Why are you having doubts, Angel?”
“I just worry that because of what happened with us, we don’t exactly know how to be real parents,” I admitted as I traced circles onto the thin fabric of his t-shirt.
“We’ve both had that real parent experience,” he said as he began rubbing my arm. “At some point,” he added with a mumble. “But you have to agree, you and I have a great idea on what better role models are like, right? I think as long as we’re not beating and neglecting our children, we should be just fine.”
I giggled, “I suppose so.”
“My point is…” he paused and cradled my face with his big hands, pulling my head back a bit as he did so. “You and I will never be like my father, and how your parents were. We will never do anything even remotely close to it. In fact, we’ll probably spoil our kids rotten.”
“We’ll probably spoil them too much,” I waved my eyebrows once, earning an energetic nod of agreement from Harry. I sighed, “Aren’t we setting a bad example though? I mean, we’re not even married yet.”
He stroked my cheekbones with the pads of his thumbs, “So we did things a little backwards, and this possible pregnancy wasn’t exactly planned, but that doesn’t make us bad examples.”
“What if...” I paused and took a breath. I bit my lip as I changed my position, straddling Harry’s lap so my legs were bent on either side of him. I wrapped my arms around his neck, “What if our baby is born with my hearing or worse?”
He smiled and placed his left hand on my waist. “Then we’ll teach them…” he held up his right hand and signed “A”, “S”, and “L”. “American sign language.”
My lips curved into a smile before they flattened again, “What if they get some other disability like down syndrome or something?”
“I wouldn’t love them any less,” he shrugged, his answer making my heart flutter.
“What if they are transgender?”
“I believe they are allowed to be whoever they want to be,” he stated, finally resting his other hand on my waist. “If they want to be a girl, then so be it. If they want to be a boy, I’d accept that too. No matter what, they’re still our child, and I’ll love them always.”
“What if they get four nipples, like you?” I smirked.
He chuckled and poked my cheek, “As long as they get their mum’s cheekbones, I’d be perfectly fine with it.” Mum…
“Do you think they’ll speak with your accent or mine?” I furrowed my brows as I pondered the question.
He scrunched his face in concentration as well, “I honestly don’t have an answer for that one.” I laughed at his response, causing him to laugh as well. “Maybe both? I don’t know. I think your sexy accent would be easier for them.”
“You think my accent is sexy, eh?” I wiggled my brows at him.
“Duh,” he crossed his eyes, making me giggle.
I leaned down and gave him a quick peck on the lips before removing myself from him and the bed. I began walking towards the bathroom to get the test and stopped when I spotted the laptop. I face palmed when I saw what webpage he was on, “Harry, this website gives you the ability to submit your own creation of names. No wonder Cactus, Baby, Ice, and whatever the other one was, is on here.”
“Cable,” he helped me fill in the blanks. “There’s no way that’s truth though.”
“One of the names is A B C D E,” I said with a hint of sass.
He laughed and joined me by the computer, leaning his chin on my shoulder as he read the screen. “No, that’s Ab-ca-d,” he tried sounding out the letters into a word.
“No,” I held the word, arguing back. “That’s the alphabet.”
“Last time I checked, the alphabet has twenty-one more letters than that,” he rasped.
I turned around to face him, shooting him a glare, “You know what I mean, Smartass. If you think that’s such a great name, you should just add it to your tattoo collection.”
He placed his hand on his chest and stumbled backwards a bit, pretending to be taken aback, “Low blow.”
“Aww, I’m kidding, Babe,” I cooed and pulled him into a hug. “I love your tattoos.” Harry has to have somewhere over forty tattoos now. I like to call him my little tattoo addict because I swear he just can’t stop. I guess he likes the thrill of the sting or something. I don’t understand it one bit. I didn’t enjoy that part at all when I got my tattoos four years ago, and I refuse to get anymore.
I rolled Harry’s sleeve up his shoulder a bit and twisted his arm slightly to reveal many of his tattoos. I searched for my favorite one, the “HI” one, and placed a kiss to it. “Especially this one,” I murmured against his skin.
“That’s my favorite one too,” he smiled, popping his beautiful dimples out before he leant down to kiss me. As he pulled away, he intertwined my fingers with his, “You ready?”
I took a deep breath and nodded. I wrapped my free arm around the same arm of his I’m already tangled with before we walked into the bathroom. We both gazed into each other’s eyes with big smiles plastered to our faces. I squeezed his hand a little tighter, him returning the gesture before we both leaned over the counter to look at the stick…
Saturday August 18th 2018 (2 Days Later)
“You look beautiful, El,” I beamed as I smoothed out the wrinkles in her wedding dress. Her dress is a beautiful strapless white gown that is tight until the bottom of her hips, the rest of it flowing down and behind her. The top part of the dress is lacy, and a silver snowflake pattern formed into a line is on the stomach of the dress. On the right side of her dress, just below her hip, is a slit that reveals her right leg and her white heels with bows on them. The dress fits who she is: pretty, elegant, and playful.
“Well, you guys look pretty amazing as well,” she gushed, eyeing each of us through the full body mirror she’s standing before.
Perrie, Sophia, Charlotte, and I are all Eleanor’s bridesmaids, Perrie being the Maid of Honor. Eleanor’s wedding colors are navy blue and white, so the four of us found the perfect matching navy blue bridesmaid dresses to wear. Each dress is short, ending about four inches above the knee, and somewhat fits our personalities or styles.
Sophia’s dress is strapless and has sort of a crinkly look to it. The thing she loves the most about it is the big bow that sits between her breasts and covers each boob. Perrie’s dress has sleeves that cover her shoulders, and the whole dress holds a lacey waved pattern, the shoulders of the dress being slightly see-through. My dress is see-through from the top of my breasts to my one inch straps and ending one/fourth of the way down my back. The top of my dress is tight while the rest flows down, the ends of my dress forming a crimping pattern.
Last but not least is Charlotte Tomlinson AKA Lottie AKA Louis’s little sister. Lottie really wanted to be part of the ceremony, and Louis just couldn’t say no to her, not that he wanted to. We all have met Lottie a few times, and we love her to death. She is the one sibling of Louis’s that Eleanor is closest to and adores unconditionally, so I’m not surprised that she is a bridesmaid. Lottie’s dress, like mine, is see-through from the top of her breasts to her shoulder length sleeves and ending a quarter of the way down her back. She has a couple wave patterns and scrunches at the top of her dress, the rest of her dress just flowing down.
To top off all of our dresses, we all have fancy updos and carry bouquets of white blossoms. Eleanor’s bouquet was bigger than ours and had a few blossoms that were painted blue just for her.
“Are you excited?” Sophia came up from behind Eleanor and rubbed El’s bare shoulders.
El smiled widely and nodded her head in an eager manor, “I’m so ready to be Mrs. Eleanor Tomlinson. I’ve been ready since he proposed.”
“Aww,” I cooed. Those two have been in love since long before I met them, so I’m happy to finally see them tying the knot. Fun fact: they choice today to get married because they thought it’d be cool considering its 8/18/18. They still are and always will be goobers.
“El? Are you guys serving sauerkraut at all tonight?” Perrie asked.
All of us busted up laughing and turned to her with puzzled looks, but it was obvious she wasn’t joking. She chewed at her thumbnail and bounced her leg nervously while she sat in a chair on the other side of the room.
“Ew, why would I want to serve that?” Eleanor shuddered at the thought of it. “It smells so bad.”
“I know,” Perrie sighed. “But I’m craving it really badly.”
“That stuff tastes horrible too,” Lottie scrunched her face and shook her head. “That’s the worst thing you could possibly crave.”
“I can’t help it,” Perrie pressed her lips into a line as she looked down at her lap. The thing is, the corners of her mouth were twitching upward, but she was trying to hide the smile.
Sophia gasped, holding her hand to her chest as her smile parted, “Oh my god, are you pregnant again?” That’s when I realized Perrie wasn’t looking down at her lap. She placed her hand onto her stomach, gently rubbing it before she gave Sophia a nod. Eleanor, Lottie, and Sophia all shared great excitement, jumping up and down with flailing arms as they screamed.
I laughed at the squealing girls as I made my way over to Perrie. I wrapped my arms around her and leaned the side of my head against her’s, “Congratulations. Now little Harley will be a big brother.”
Ah, Harley: possibly the cutest little boy on the planet. He’s got the prettiest blue eyes, like his mommy’s but a little darker. His skin is just as pale as Perrie’s as well, not even tinted from Zayn’s skin tone. There’s an odd thing about him: he has light brown hair. Zayn has really dark brown hair that's almost black and Perrie is blonde, so we have no idea where Harley's tan-ish/brown hair came from. We came to the conclusion that God chose the in between shade since he didn’t seem to look like Zayn’s baby at all. We often tease Zayn, asking him who the real baby daddy is, but it’s definitely him.
Harley is only a year old now, being born a year after Perrie and Zayn’s wedding. Harry and I like to take our opportunities in babysitting him, but it rarely happens seeming as both Perrie and Zayn’s families want to see him too. Then there’s the rest of the group who’d like to see him as well. He’s a popular little infant. He’s at the wedding today, probably being passed around Lou’s family in the crowd.
“Thank you,” Perrie chirped as we pulled away from each other.
“I’m so happy for you!” Eleanor made her way over to Perrie and held her tight.
This gave me the chance to turn away from them and reveal my true frown. I wouldn’t allow myself to hold this feeling for longer than a few seconds. Today is a good day, a day of celebration, and I will not feel sorry for myself during it.
Luckily, El’s father stepped into the room, preventing me from further sorrow. “Hey, Baby. It’s time.” I turned and genuinely smiled at her beaming face. Two of my best friends are getting married.
I sat at the table by myself, watching the father/daughter dance El and her dad shared on the dance floor. The boys were all standing near the dance floor watching Eleanor in awe, and I could tell they were teasing Lou a bit as they stared. Ed Sheeran and the guys from 5SOS are joined with the boys, occasionally waving their hands to the song and jokingly whistling at El. She and her father would just giggle at their actions.
I couldn’t help but smile at the ruckus. This is a regular thing for us. Ever since Harry and the boys had gotten noticed by Simon Cowell from YouTube videos posted of them at the talent show, they’ve become pretty famous. The fame was stressful on all of us at first, but we somehow managed to make it work. Harry and I have had similar and worse problems, so we knew this wouldn’t break us. I wish I could say the same for Sophia and Liam…
The girls and I would have a Girl’s Night every week where we’d vent about fans, paparazzi, false stories and accusations, and the boys being around less. Week by week, Eleanor, Perrie and I only seemed to gain more confidence in our relationships while Sophia was crumbling before us. We tried so hard to help her by taking her out to distract her, occasionally taking her on trips to see the boys, and getting her drunk a lot. Nothing ever seemed to help. The stress was getting to be too much for her.
Fans were calling her an ugly gold-digger, and the paparazzi would announce her “pregnancy.” She couldn’t go anywhere without being verbally abused by girls or employees in places like grocery stores. She’d get jealous when a girl would ask for a picture with me, El, and/or Pez, but not her. While all of this was happening, the boys were on tour. It was hard enough for Sophia to be so far from Liam, but it was too much knowing he couldn’t always pick up the phone for her and comfort her. They constantly fought about it, but it wasn’t like Liam could do anything about it other than to try and FaceTime her more. It was no use.
After about six months of this, she couldn’t take it anymore. She left him. The girls and I sympathized her, but we felt just as bad for Liam. They cared for each other a lot, but it wasn’t enough to carry them through their struggles.
They remain friends, but I can tell it’s hard for both of them. Especially since when we were walking down the aisle, Sophia got paired with Niall and Liam with Lottie. They still talk here and there, but Sophia has decided to remain focused on her schooling and not worry about it. There’s no telling whether they’ll ever get back together or not, but there’s no denying their feelings are still there. They still look at each other the same way they did four years ago: with definite care.
Just like Sophia, Eleanor and I have continued doing schooling. We do it all online so we don’t have to be bombarded by fans every time we’d go to school. Perrie, on the other hand, has taken a job in the music industry just as the boys have. She sings in a band called Little Mix. I’ve met all of her bandmates, and they’re great girls. Good for her, right?
The only thing I’ve gotten paid for in four years is to pose on the cover of two magazines. People have seen the scars on my wrist along with my “Fighter” tattoo, so I eventually announced my bullying story. I said nothing of my family in order to protect them. I don’t need them criticized for something they’ve already apologized and I have forgiven them for. I spoke of being sexually abused, but I never got into details about it, not wanting to sound like I was desperate for attention. I also never used names, protecting the identities of those who have pained me.
I was told I’m an inspiration, having been bullied and sexually abused, yet here I am. I had cut myself and wanted to die, but I’m “living the dream” now. So I got a place on the Seventeen magazine cover, leaning my head onto the hand of my scarred wrist and showing off my old wounds and tattoo. After that, I got a place on the W magazine: the picture Harry had not approved of. I was topless and braless for this shoot, but they only took the picture just above my breasts. They wanted to get a shot of my heartbeat tattoo, and they wanted my fighter tattoo added to it. My pose was almost as if I were stretching. My head was facing to the side as my hands hovered over my shoulders, wrists facing the camera as my fingers curled. Harry wasn’t fond of the fact that my boobs were being shown to all of the employees, but he understood that I didn’t want to rely on him for money all of the time. “It was a onetime thing,” I’d tell him, and I meant it. I would never flash in a room full of people like that again. To say, "It was uncomfortable," would be an understatement.
Eleanor is now unemployed considering her mom is just happy she’s “famous” for being engaged, now married, to Lou. I guess her mom just wanted her to be a success since she’s the only child in the family.
Liz finally came out and told the world she was pretending to be Elizabeth Foster at our high school, hiding her true identity of Wendy Beckett. She still has us call her Liz, saying she’s grown to love that name more than her own. Her dreams had come true, and she now owns her own fashion company: Blizzard. Occasionally, Liz asks Eleanor to fill in for models at her fashion shows, and Eleanor loves to help her out considering Liz doesn’t boss her around like her mom had.
Liz has remained close friends with us after all of these years. In fact, she’s somewhere here at this wedding. Today, because the girls and I are well-known for our relationships with the One Direction boys, Liz designs the dresses we wear out in public. We proudly model for the paparazzi in her creations and tell reporters that it’s her designs we wear. She’s a great woman, and I’m so happy to have her in our life.
I sighed happily as my eyes scanned the crowd for the girls. My blissfulness had faded once I noticed Lottie and Sophia cooing at baby Harley who was being held by Perrie. I looked down at my stomach, disappointed with my empty uterus. I know I shouldn’t be sad that I’m not pregnant, but the look of letdown Harry had expressed when we saw the negative sign bummed me out.
I began to wonder; what if I can’t ever get pregnant? I know we haven’t been trying or anything, but the thoughts clouded in my mind as I thought back to the rape. Maybe Scott had damaged something, and now I can’t carry my own child. That’s something I never thought about, and now having this little “scare” concerned me. I’d like to have children someday with Harry, but what if I can’t? Will he hate me?
“Hey Beautiful,” a raspy voice breathed in my ear.
Harry pressed his lips to my cheek before standing in front of me. His hypnotizing smile fell when he realized I was gloomy, and he held out his hand for me. I sighed and took his hand, allowing him to pull me to my feet and intertwine our fingers. He led me to the middle of the dance floor where all of the guests were slow dancing now. He placed one of his hands against my lower back, holding me very close to him as his other hand tangled with one of mine. I placed my free hand onto his shoulder and began to sway to the music, following his lead.
“I’m guessing you heard the news,” he forced a smile, and I nodded. “Why are you so sad, Angel? I mean, we could actually try this time,” he shrugged and laughed slightly at his words.
I let out a little puff of giggles before sighing again, “Do you think that I’ll be able to even get pregnant, you know, after the whole Scott thing happening?”
He furrowed his brows, but not in confusion. It seemed as if he had only just thought of this himself. “It depends on how much he…” his voice trailed off. I know what he means: how much damage did Scott do? It also depends on how my body healed and scarred from such a traumatic event.
“It’d be my fault,” I frowned and looked down at our feet. “I didn’t fight hard enough. I gave up because I felt I deserved it. I should’ve fought harder and maybe it wouldn’t have happened.”
“Mercy,” he brought his hand from my back up to cup my face. His eyes filled with worry as he gazed into mine. “Even if that were true, even if we couldn’t have our own baby, I want you to know that I would never blame you for that. Sure, it’d be amazing to have a child of our own someday, but if we can’t, we can’t. Don’t be so hard on yourself, Angel. It’s not your doing. It’s not like you asked him to do that to you. It happened, and you were fragile. I could never blame you.”
I nodded and buried my head into his chest, not wanting people to notice the unhappiness I feel. This is supposed to be a cherishing day, but I can’t help the thoughts that are creeping in my mind. I shouldn’t be like this though; it’s not fair to El and Lou. Yet I remain feeling these mixed emotions while my arms are wrapped around Harry’s waist as his are wrapped around my shoulders and neck, holding me close to him as we swayed to the music.
“We’re not even married yet, you know?” Harry chucked, attempting to lighten up the mood. “In a way, I’m kind of glad you’re not pregnant because now we can just focus on our wedding which, dare I say, will be better than this one.”
A snort slipped from my lips as I tried to stifle back my laughter. “Oh most definitely. This wedding is so lame,” I looked up at him and giggled.
He nodded, “Exactly. Ours will be perfect. The ceremony will be done indoors, just before sundown. Then, the reception will be outdoors, under the stars, and we’ll have lots of lights. I remember you saying how much you've dreamed of a wedding like that. Oh, and the guys and I, we’re not wearing suspenders,” Harry rolled his eyes as he tugged on one of the straps of the white suspenders he’s wearing.
Lou thought it’d be cool if all of the guys wore navy blue button up shirts with suspenders. I think that’s a strange wedding outfit, but whatever, it’s his wedding.
“Aww,” I teased and fisted his suspenders. “Why not? I think you look very handsome in them.”
“Well there’s no denying that,” his voice was overly cocky, but I knew he was only kidding. “I just happen to think we’re a bit more mature than them.”
“You’re a bit more mature than who, Haz?” Louis asked from behind him, his arms crossed as he anticipated Harry’s answer. Harry pulled away from me to face Lou, but he kept our hands intertwined as they dangled between us.
“Uh, than Perrie and Zayn, duh,” Harry stated as if he were pointing out the obvious. I brought my hand to my mouth to cover up my smile that was struggling to hold back laughter. Harry noticed this action and tried to avoid eye contact with me so he wouldn’t lose it either.
Lou grinned and shook his head at us, “Nice cover up, but I heard the whole thing.”
Harry turned to me with fake disappointment, “When we’re talking shit on someone, you’re supposed to warn me if they’re nearby.”
“I’m pretty sure you’re the lookout since you’re a tree,” I argued, making Louis laugh.
“Oh yeah, you two are way more sophisticated,” Louis said with sarcasm.
“Totally,” I joked. I released myself from Harry’s grip and walked over to Louis to wrap my arms around his neck. I pulled him close to me, and he returned the hug by snaking his arms around my waist. “Congrats Lou. It’s about damn time,” I laughed.
He pulled away but held me at arm’s length, “Are you kidding me? You and Haz have been engaged longer than El and I.”
“Well we have our reasons for that,” I shrugged.
We do. Harry and I got engaged around the time One Direction started becoming a hit. We decided to hold off on wedding plans till we were used to the pressure of the paparazzi and the fans. We just wanted to be sure we were strong enough for this. At first, we struggled a bit, just as the rest of them did. I sort of think I struggled the most because Harry is the only person I’ve really ever depended on and he wasn’t always there. It turns out, he was feeling just as disappointed with it as I was. He loves his career, but it sucked that he couldn’t share the experience with me all the time.
That’s why we wound up getting a place together. This way we are spending more time with each other whenever he’s home. It’s also calming knowing the place smells like him, especially his side of the bed. Whenever he’s on tour, I usually send him away with one of my scarves so he can have my scent with him as well. The other boys thought it was strange at first, but they started doing that as well. You can only imagine how crazy Niall thought all of them were.
Once we got passed that obstacle, Sophia and Liam broke up, so we were being there for them. Then, Perrie and Zayn were having their wedding, so yet again, we decided to wait. Then, Perrie and Zayn had a baby and were completely exhausted. Now, it’s Louis and Eleanor’s wedding. We’ve decided that for sure we’ll be getting married soon. Harry says Lou will just have to keep his junk in his pants until after our wedding. Surprisingly, it seems its Zayn and Perrie who need to talk about birth control or something.
“Plus, you’re just really slow,” Harry added as he patted Louis’s back. “You and El have been together since Sophomore Year. I have no idea what took you so long.”
Louis exaggerated a sigh. “What was I thinking?” he asked rhetorically in a humorous tone.
Just then, I felt a tap on my shoulder. I turned around to find blue eyes looking into mine. A smile plastered Niall’s face as he held a hand out for me, “Would you like to dance, Flower?”
I turned to Harry, my eyes pleading him to allow me. It’s not that he gets jealous of Niall anymore, but I can tell it makes him feel better knowing I’m still looking out for his feelings. He nodded in approval before turning back to Louis to start another conversation about the flavor of the wedding cake we’ll be eating later.
“Why yes I would, Porky,” I curtsied before taking his hand. Yes, we do still use our nicknames for each other, and I’m sure it’ll be like that for a long time, if not forever. Since we were already on the dance floor, Niall cupped his hand around mine and placed his other hand on my back. I placed my free hand on his shoulder, and swayed with him like I had been with Harry not that long ago. The thing about Niall is that he doesn’t have the patience for slow songs, so he is rocking us in a fast pace. Such a dork.
“I’m surprised you didn’t join that conversation with them about the cake,” I teased Niall, referring to the topic Harry and Lou were discussing.
He shrugged, “Maybe the fact that I haven’t seen you in like weeks is more important.”
“Weeks, eh?” I raised my brows at him and chuckled. “You didn’t seem to mind as much after your year round tour.”
“Did to,” he argued. “Your place was the first place I went when we got back.”
“And may I remind you what you did?” I smirked. “You went straight to the kitchen to raid our cabinets.”
He playfully rolled his eyes, “It was a long trip, and I was hungry.”
“You guys were in the same state for your last show,” I snickered. “So what’s up, Nialler? Is there something you wanted to talk about?”
He sighed, “How do you always know these things?”
“Good instincts,” I replied without hesitation. In reality, I’ve just known Niall long enough to tell when he’s trying to get me to speak with him. “So talk to me.”
“I uh, I met someone,” he started, but I interrupted him with an “oooooo.” He shook his head at me, “This is why I didn’t want to tell the boys, you know?”
I brought my lips between my teeth and giggled. “Oh, sorry,” I took my hand off his shoulder and gestured that I was locking my mouth shut.
He gave me a slight nod, “Thank you. Anyways, I’m thinking about taking her on a date, and I’m pretty out of practice in that area, so I was wondering if you’d help me out.”
“No problem,” I gushed. I feel pretty flattered knowing he seeks my help over the other girls, but it seems all of the boys have felt that way. Liam asked me for help when he and Sophia were fighting, Zayn asked me for help planning his anniversaries with Perrie, Louis asked me for help picking out gifts for Eleanor, and now Niall needs my help with this mystery woman. Harry tends to go to Perrie considering he needs another girl’s opinion like the other guys do.
“Can I have everyone’s attention?” Louis’s mother asked into a microphone at the front of the room. The music was stopped and everyone turned to see what she had to say. “It’s time for Mr. and Mrs. Louis Tomlinson to cut the cake.”
Just then, Niall threw his fists in the air and shouted, “WHOO!” Laughter roared throughout the room knowing Niall is definitely a food lover.
I grabbed Niall’s arm and guided him over to the long rectangular table that holds Eleanor and Louis’s wedding cake. By the time we got over there, just about everyone else in the room was circling the table. Louis and Eleanor were in the very center, carefully removing the top tier of their wedding cake. I guess it’s tradition to save the top tier, keep it in your freezer, and eat it on your one year anniversary. Perrie and Zayn told us it surprisingly stays fresh and yummy.
Once they removed the top, Lou’s mom and stepfather carefully packaged it up. Louis handed Eleanor the cake cutter and put his hand on her grip to help her cut the cake.
“Whoo, you cut that cake,” Ashton shouted them words of encouragement, causing people to chuckle. I watched as Louis whispered something in Eleanor’s ear while they cut into the cake. She reacted with a giggle and by reaching her arm behind her to slap his side. Knowing Louis, he said something dirty to her.
“That’ll be us soon.” I didn’t even have to turn around to know it was Harry who just said that. I’ve grown to memorize his voice, touch, smell…everything about him. He snaked his arms around me and rested his chin onto my shoulder. I hummed to his touch and leaned back against him as I hugged his arms that are around me.
We watched as Louis and Eleanor placed the piece of cake carefully onto a plate. They set the knife down onto the table and grabbed their own forks to eat the cake. Each of them scooped up some cake and shot each other cheeky grins. We knew what was coming.
Eleanor and Louis each simultaneously set their forks down and scooped up cake in their hands. Within seconds, they were smearing the goopy looking substance all over each other’s faces, sharing laughs as we all chuckled with them.
“We just won’t do that,” Harry confirmed.
“If you did, I’d have to kill you,” I joked as I shook my head against him.
He gasped, “You’d never do that.”
I turned in his arms and shook my head again, “Nah, I love you too much to do that.”
“Good,” he said sternly. He softened his features up and giggled a bit, “I love you too.”
“Good,” I said before pressing my lips to his.
“Okay you two, break it up,” Liz crouched under Harry and I’s arms so she could stand before us. Harry’s mouth parted as he let out slow shocked laughs, his eyes boring into the back of Liz’s head as she faces me. “I don’t know about you guys, but I’m not hungry for cake yet. That meal was filling. Let’s dance.”
“It seems like I’ve been living on the dance floor today,” I snorted. “But sure, sounds fun. Let’s go.” Liz and I locked arms, but before we even took a step towards the dance floor, I held out my other arm to Harry. He sighed. Pretending to be aggravated as he linked his arm with mine, but I could see the smile forming on his face.
We skipped over to the dance floor like the dorks we are. Of course, Louis had the DJ playing old school music, and the song that happened to be on was “Low” by Flo Rida. Good thing the kids here aren’t old enough to understand the words.
We are dancing harmlessly to the music seeming as that’s important now that kids are around. I threw my fists in the air and bounced to the music. Every now and then, Liz and I would share wide grins and bump our hips with each other. Harry did his normal goofy dances where he’d swing his arms in large slow circles as he held his head down. God, I love that weirdo.
Eventually, Liam had joined us, doing the robot and a chopping motion. Then there was Zayn and Perrie who were waving their arms around and rocking their heads to the music. Eleanor, Louis, and Sophia jumped in as well, doing their own silly dance moves as well, such as plugging their nose with one hand and wiggling their other hand as if they were swimming. Lastly, Niall came over and rocked back and forth as he held his plate of cake, nibbling at it here and there. At all of the “low, low, low, low, low, low, low, low” parts, we were all wiggling our feet as if we were squishing bugs while we’d lower ourselves into squatting positions.
Just like old times, we were all on the dance floor; minus the alcohol, other drugs, and slutty clothes. It almost felt like we were back in high school, and it made me feel younger. Then, suddenly 5SOS and Ed Sheeran joined us on the dance floor, sweeping us back into reality. Three and a half years of this, and I’m still not used to it. I love every single bit of it though.
As we continued to dance to other jams, I caught a glance of Harley being bounced on Lottie’s hip as she held him. That baby made me feel a little sad again, but I tried to ignore my feelings. Still, one thought remained in my mind: Will I ever be able to have a baby?
TO BE CONTINUED(;
STAY TUNED FOR PART 2 :D
Notes
Hey guys, so if you don't see already, there's going to be a part 2 to the Epilogue. I have so much more planned out, and I still need Harry's POV in their because you guys asked for it to be half and half.
As you can see, pregnancy and wedding were the two events I played into this because those two tied in your votes.
For the next part, I am adding in yet another event that I have thought of, and I'm excited to write it. I think it's different, but only because I haven't read anyone else's stories and seen this event in them.
P.S. Kik me if you'd like: smileshortly
I love this story so much!!!
11/18/17