*Reagan’s POV*
I awoke this morning to an empty bed like I have many times before, however this time was different. There was no alarm clock to break my slumber, and for a moment I began to panic. I rushed to the bathroom and showered as quickly as I could before I rushed past Harry who held two mugs of tea and an amused and confused look on his face as I began to quickly find something suitable to wear to the office.

“What are you laughing at?! I’m going to be late!”

“Reagan you-”

“No Harry! Dr. Koch is going to kill me!...Where’s my other shoe?”

“Reagan-”

“I need my other shoe Harry, the black one like this!”

“Reagan! You don’t have to work today!” Harry’s amused look quickly changed to that of an annoyed one as he grabbed me by my shoulders light green eyes looking into that of frazzled hazel.

I took a deep breath before I remembered Dr. Koch’s discovery yesterday and him dismissing me for two weeks with pay because of it. Harry picked up one of the mugs from off of his bedside table took a sip from it before he unbuttoned my work blouse and removed it from my shoulders.

“You’ve buttoned this wrong,” he said while quietly laughing to himself, “You’re here with me for two weeks glasses. You need to relax. Slow down a bit.” I nodded and could feel myself shudder when I caught a glimpse of myself nearly naked in the mirror. I don’t feel like myself and I’m not sure when I will again. I move aside so that I can no longer see my reflection and see Harry’s instead. He drinks his tea and places my work blouse into his drawer, without folding it might I add.

I quickly pull on a pair of jeans and an old UCLA t-shirt so I don’t feel so naked and exposed in front of Harry before I take a sip of my tea and sit back down on the bed. Harry finishes his drink off before he falls back onto his sheets beside me. He runs a hand over his face and then winces when he reaches his eye. I’m not the only one who’s forgotten about yesterdays’ event’s I see.

“I have nothing to do Harry. I don’t know what to do. I feel like I need to be doing something, because if I don’t...” I trail off not wanting to finish my sentence causing Harry to look at me from the spaces he’s created in-between his fingers.

“If you don’t, what?”

“Nothing.”

“Don’t do that to me,” Harry sits up and looks at me sternly, “ You know what happens with us when we don’t communicate with each other. If you need to talk to me you can.”

“I don’t need to talk. I’m fine Harry, really.” I speak quickly causing H. to scoff.

“Then what were you going to say a minute ago if you’re ‘fine’ like you say you are.”

I was going to say that if I don’t find something to do that I’ll be obligated to think about Peyton and the text messages he sent me that has changed my outlook on myself, about how stupid I feel and how disgusting and used I am, but I don’t want to voice these things out loud anymore. The more I talk about it, the more it seems to give Peyton some kind of power over me, so I don’t. I’m not going to talk about it anymore.

“I was going to say that if I don’t find something to do it will drive me slowly insane. Two weeks Harry? I would have been fine with a couple of days, but two weeks is too much. I don’t like sitting idle. I feel like I should always be doing something.”

Harry scrunches his nose in disgust at my statement and the look on his face causes me to laugh a little. His scowl slowly turns into a grin that makes a small pit on his right cheek.

"You say that like relaxing is some kind of sin." Harry waves his hands in the air in front of us as he talks animatedly with me, but I can't focus on what it is that he's saying. My eyes are drawn to his mouth and how his plump lips curl perfectly at the corners.

“What are you grinning at, Harry?”

“You.”

“Why? What did I do?” Harry rolls his eyes and stands from the bed, making his way over to his closet to pull out his signature dark wash skinny jeans and black oversized sweater that is partially see through. He then goes over to his drawer to pull out a black tank top before he sheds himself of his grey joggers and white t-shirt.

“I’ve become rather sappy being with you. I was grinning at your laugh. I love it when you laugh, even if it’s a small one.”

Harry looks over his shoulder at me as he gets his pants all the way up his legs, and grins while shaking his head as if he didn’t mean to actually speak his confession. I drop my head and finish my tea instead of embarrassing him further like I normally would.

“Anyway,” Harry continues, “what was that about last night?”

“What was what about H?” I finish my tea and set it on the bedside table. I know what he’s referencing to, but I can’t bring the words to come out of my mouth. It’s too difficult to explain. I snap my fingers in order to change the subject causing Harry to jump and look over at me confused.

“I know what to do with my time off!” I walk over to my messenger bag and pull out my iPad and its keyboard then sit in the middle of Harry’s bed. I take my glasses off of his bedside dresser and place them neatly on my face before I start to type with vigor onto my small device.

Harry walks over to the bedside clearly aggravated that I blew off his question, but he doesn’t bring it up again. Instead, he looks down on my screen with an eyebrow raised before another smirk rests on his lips.

“Finally, I was starting to think that you didn’t want to look up schools here anymore.”

“I just didn’t really have the time until now...I would change schools a thousand times to be with you Harry.” I can see Harry’s eyes begin to glitter and bring forth a certain life to them even through the dark circles that surround them from lack of sleep. A secret smile graces his lips before he kisses my cheek. I can feel a blush heat my skin when I realize the truth in my words. I would do almost anything to be with Harry, especially since I’ve experienced what it’s like for me to be without him.

Harry stands from the bed again yawning as he does and does one final stretch before he bends to put on his shoes. Hopefully in my time off, I can get H. to get the proper rest that he needs and deserves. There is nothing healthy about him losing sleep the way he does.

“Where are you going?” Harry grabs his keys off of his dresser.

“I have breakfast shift at the pub. I traded hours with Zayn last night after you went to sleep.”

“So you get to work and I don’t?”

“Yes. I get to work and you don’t. It won’t kill you to relax a bit. You’ve just gone through something traumatic and-” I interrupt Harry before he can finish.

“It’s not about that. I know how to relax H. I’m just going to be bored when you’re gone. It doesn’t take long for me to fill out applications.” I speak in a pouty voice to Harry, but it’s about much more now than just being bored. I have a definite fear of being alone with my thoughts.

“That’s why I got breakfast shift, glasses. I’ll be back by three instead of eleven at night and you can annoy the shit out of me then. Invite Laurie over or something when she gets out of class, just no parties or anything like that while I’m gone please.”

I smile small at Harry before I stand out of bed to give him a brief kiss on the lips and follow him down the stairs. I watch his car speed off down the street and sigh to myself when I let it sink in that I’ll be alone for the next six hours in Anne’s house. I head back up the stairs to Harry’s room and fill out applications to, Sheffield University, University of Westminster and one other college that London has to offer before the University of London pops up and I’m once again reminded of Peyton. The university that we conduct our research from would have probably been on the top of my list, but now it’s full of ill memories that I wish to forget. Laurie seems to love the school and I’m sure it would have been an enchanting place to go if I didn't work there with the devil in disguise.

I shut down the iPad quickly and decide to call Laurie like Harry suggested. It’s almost one now. I’m proud of myself for doing so many applications. My grades on my transcripts from freshman and sophomore year aren’t bad and I’m sure that Dr. Koch will have something nice to say about me when he’s asked since this work that I’m doing for him now counts as a semester worth of credits. Despite his usual show for disdain for me when we’re in the office, he knows that I’m a good worker and a smart one. It’s why he hasn’t let me go when honestly he could have on more than one occasion. I’m bound to get into at least one of the schools that I put in an application for today.

I dial Laurie’s number and am glad to receive an answer on the fourth ring.

“Reagan?! How are you?” She sounds generally excited that I called.

“I’m okay I guess. Um, I got two weeks off of work and I’m already bored beyond my wits end. This is only day one.” Laurie laughs at the desperation in my voice before she continues.

“I’m just leaving my morning classes now before I have to be back around two. Do you want to hang out? Get lunch maybe?” I agree quickly and grab my jacket before heading down the stairs to wait for her. As soon as I reach the bottom of the stairway my pocket vibrates alerting me that I have a text.

From: Harry Pleassssse?!
I fucking Hate breakfast shift and right now I’m not too sure how I feel about Louis! How are you? What are you doing in my house all alone ;)?

---

*Harry’s POV*
I put my phone back in my pocket and wipe down the counter for the tenth time today. The activity in the pub slows down a bit and I count the amount of tips I’ve made so far. £45. Breakfast shift fucking sucks and I want my night shift back, but my nights need to be kept available for Reagan. Night shifts are always longer and I know now is not the time to leave her by herself.

I didn’t forget that she evaded my question about last night and honestly she’s acting a bit strange. I know what’s wrong with her, there’s no way to get around that, but I need her to talk to me. My phone vibrates and I go sit in the kitchen with Louis before I answer the text.

“If you yawn again, I’m going to stuff a dish rag in your mouth!” Louis throws a rag at me to make his point.

“What the hell time do you go to sleep?”

I don’t...Not really. I’ve been able to catch a few hours here or there, but as soon as I feel like I may get to a point of being comfortable in my rest, I’m reminded that I never will be. This morning I had the dream again where Clive is replaced by another battered face. I continue to beat and beat and by the time I realize who it is that’s under me, it’s too late. I shake the thought and throw the towel back at Louis before I flip him off, now properly put on edge by the images that haunt me at night before I read my text.

From: Glasses
Leave Louis alone H. I’m going out to lunch with Laurie. I needed to get out, hope that’s okay? I’ll see you when you get off. Only a few more hours left.

I shoved the phone back in my pocket once again and didn’t bother to say anything else. I had kind of hoped that she would send me a dirty message back, but then I realized how selfish I was being for even wishing so. My mind wanders to the last time that Reagan and I fucked. It’s been a couple of days now and even though its slowly killing me on the inside, I won’t dare try that with her yet until she gives me a better understanding of what she’s going through.

When I got off work, everyone was home except who I wanted to see. Robin yanked the door open, before I could even get my key in the lock good and I could feel myself turn pale at the sight of him. I cleared my throat and mustered up a sad ‘hello’ before I walked into the kitchen. My nerves were already shot from the cheap bastards that I had to deal with at the pub today and a full house was the last thing that I wanted to deal with.

My mum started to say something to me but stopped mid-sentence when she noticed my bruised eye.

Notes

HELLO BEAUTIFUL NEW AND FAITHFUL SUBSCRIBERS!! I apologize in advance for the short chapter. The others will be longer, I promise. Thank you all for your well wishes and votes! I'm slowly but surely getting better. How are you all doing? I have an update for you because well, I love you. What did you guys think about this chapter? I need more feed back loves I thrive off of it! So be sure to leave me some comments below.Reagan is back to holding things in but at the same time, so is Harry. His dream that was discussed in book two wasn't about Peyton and its back to haunt him in book three! Who do you guys think it could be about ;) ?? LOVE YOU ALL FOR READING and I'm going to put the edits here again. tell me if you can see them this time.