*Harry’s POV*
The air was sucked out of the room and my heart drummed a mile a minute in my chest. Four days was hard enough to tolerate. Two more fucking weeks and I’ll be in hell. I never knew just how possible it was to be attached to a person until now, but as I re-read the words in the message I can almost feel the distance grow more between us. I don’t know why I thought that she would have been fine by now. I bought her a one way ticket home, because I didn’t know how long it would take. Laurie said that these things can take time and I should know first hand, but Reagan is stronger than me. It’s unfair that my hope for her speedy recovery is beyond rationality, but I need her back now.

This is supposed to help, and I’m being selfish, but I know now that sending her away is one of the biggest mistakes I could have made. My mind starts to wander and I can’t help but think that maybe that fucking doctor has no clue what she’s doing. I should have never listened to Laurie. Reagan being away for me for this long isn’t helping anything! I could have helped her. We could have helped each other. I’ve been reading the letter that my dad wrote me before he died a lot more now since she’s been away, hoping that it would get me through the day the way it used to before I met her. But the ink on the paper starts to fade and run together the more I try to use it as her substitute. Nothing works. Nothing calms me down but Reagan.

The grip that I had on my phone was tight and throwing it was all that I could do to keep my emotions under control. It shattered on impact and before I realized what I had done, Tamsin was already bent over picking up the pieces of it for me.

“Are you alright?” She handed me the phone and stopped me in my tracks. I didn’t even know that I was pacing.

“Harry?”

“I’m fine, I’m fine, I’m fucking fine! What do you want, Tamsin?!” My fingers run through my hair tugging it slightly. I should have never agreed to this. Seeing Tamsin only adds to chaos in my mind.

“To tell you that you’re not fine.” The blue of her eyes deepens when I look at her changing from that of the sky into the ocean.

“What?!”

“You’re falling apart, Harry and it’s the last thing that you need right now. I know it’s not my business, but–”

“You hit the nail on the head there, Tamsin. It’s none of your fucking business! It never is, is it?” She nods her head before she continues.

“I know it’s none of my business, but the last time I saw you this way was when you were trying to hold everything in. When Clive was still alive. You tried to bottle everything up before you exploded when in all actuality you needed someone to confide in that you could let everything out to. Clive was taunting you and the only difference between him and Reagan is–”

“Don’t! You stop right there! Don’t you fucking dare. If this is what you came to talk to me about then leave! They’re nothing alike!” My voice lowers to a growl. Reagan is nothing like Clive and the fact that she just tried to compare the two would almost be laughable if she didn’t just piss me off.

“Aren’t they? They both serve as a problem for you Harry. Clive beat you and she brings you the dramatics that you can do without. She’s using you the same way Clive did, but hers is a mental abuse. Why do you think that Reagan kept going to see that boy when she knew that it would upset you? Why did you allow it to keep happening? She knew what you would do to protect her when her affair with Peyton went awry and she used it against you.”

“Shut up Tamsin! You have no idea what you’re talking about.” I try to drown her out. I want to leave, but my feet stay firmly in place.

“Why did you let Clive beat you when you could have told your mum what was going on?” Her eyes fill with tears and she begins to shake her head back in forth. “I’ll never forget that night Harry.”

“Tamsin–” I look at her with a murderous glare as my patience begins to diminish but she cuts me off. Completely ignoring my warning.

“I’m here for you and I always have been, Harry and you don’t want to admit it, but you’re here for me too. You need me. You confide in me. Who did you call when Reagan left the first time? You took me up on the offer that I made you without even a full day in between. Why is it do you think you’re so drawn to me Harry?”

I looked at her but couldn’t answer as my chest rose and fell at a heightened pace, trying to calm my nerves.

“You remember that night as well as I do. “

*Flash Back (Tamsin’s POV)*
It had to be around ten thirty at night when I left out of Gemma’s room to get something to drink. I had assumed everyone else was sleeping like Gem and I had been, but obviously that wasn’t the case.

Clive had come out of his office and I ducked into the bathroom before he noticed I was there. He began to walk in my direction but stopped ten feet away in front of Harry’s door, opening it abruptly.

“Get up!” His voice was low, but booming in a threatening manner. I had never heard him speak that way before.

Not two minutes later he had reemerged from the room with Harry in tow, going back to his office. The curls on Harry’s hair lay flat on one side and he looked as if he’d been asleep.

It was none of my business and I planned to stay out of it, but after I had successfully grabbed a bottle of water from the refrigerator, I heard muffled noises behind Clive’s office door. Muffled voices followed by deathly thudding sounds echoed through my ears and my ears only. It wasn’t loud enough to reach down the hall, but what I heard quickly matched what I saw.

I stood frozen and unnoticed in the kitchen doorway as Clive left his office, throwing his golf club to the side and unrolling the sleeves to his work shirt as he walked down to the bedroom that he and Anne shared closing the door behind him. When Harry came out grasping onto his side, doubled over in pain, I couldn’t stop myself from following behind him.

The skin on his side had already quickly started to bruise and the angry red welt seemed to expand as he examined it, wincing as he raised his arm to get a better look.
“What is that?” His head quickly snapped in my direction.

“What the fuck Tamsin?!” Harry’s voice came out at an eerily low octave, but the tears in his eyes contradicted the menacing look he tried to give. “What are you doing following me?! Why are even up? Go bother Gemma. You’re her company, not mine!”

I was unphased by his words seeing as how the little bastard would always talk to me that way. It was our way of flirting and something about his cross behavior attracted me to him. He was a bad boy and a sweetheart all at the same time. Sometimes strangely crossing between the two personalities at the blink of an eye.

“What is that? What is that on your side? Did Clive?–.” Harry pulled me into his room and closed the door behind us after he put his hand over my mouth to silence me. When he removed it I spoke again.

“You could have a broken rib. Was– Did Clive hit you with that golf club?”

“No! And no I don’t! Nothing happened. I’ve had this for days! I got this at football practice when I fell.”

“Harry I fucking saw you leave his office. That wasn’t there five minutes ag–”

“Tamsin, shut the fuck up! If you weren't around eaves dropping you wouldn't have to assume anything!” He snapped, eyes darkening quickly and then softening along with his voice once again as he traced my lips with his finger.

“I got this when I fell during practice and you were never down here. Nod your head ‘yes’ please.” His fingers moved from my lips to the side of my face, tracing my jawline back and forth as I nodded.

Harry planted the softest of kisses to my cheek and I could feel my heart speed up in my chest. Harry and I have kissed in secret many times before this and it had been heated and sensual before, but something about this time felt different.

“I want to help you. You need to tell your mum and Gemma. Your step-father should not be putting his hands–” Harry rolled his eyes before his lips ghosted over mine cutting off my sentence. I could feel his breath against my lips as he talked in a steady hushed tone.

“If you want to help me, then keep your mouth shut. Nothing happened and you didn’t see shit...I want to fuck you. I’ve wanted to fuck you since the first day that Gemma introduced you to me.”

“You were fourteen then and barely knew what your dick was for.”

“Are you sure of that?” Harry asked me in a playful tone allowing his lips to slightly turn upwards at the sides as he smirked at me. His lips grazed against mine, tickling me before he continued. “I was fourteen and I wanted you, the same way I want you now. I need you and have needed you for a long time. I–” I cut off his speech naively when I should have let him finish his sentence, kissing him and claiming him as mine. His mouth was rough but soft as the contact deepened, moving in sync with each other in a way that I haven’t experienced with anyone my own age. Harry smiled into the kiss and leaned in to me as I pulled away to tease him the way that I know that he enjoys before he pulled his lips from me rutting his eyebrows and scowling.

“Repeat it! Nothing happened, Tamsin and you weren’t in my room. Yes?”

“Nothing happened.” I spoked in the same hushed tone that he was using only moments ago before he roughly pushed me down on his bed.

I know I shouldn’t have allowed it, but a smirk played out on my lips. I was being dominated by a sixteen year old and although I was three years his senior, I willingly gave in to his demands. As we hurriedly removed our clothing and Harry made his first thrust into me, I knew at that moment that what we shared was more than an animalistic desire. Hushed moans filled the room and after we both separately reached our euphoric states, the look on Harry’s face became more vulnerable than it was when he came.

I traced over the bruise lightly with my fingertips causing him to wince in pain once more before he grabbed my hand, holding it on his chest. There was an unusual lump in his rib and though I didn’t say it I knew that it had to be fractured.

“Is this the first time it’s happened Harry? What I’m supposed to pretend that I didn’t see?” Harry glanced over at me quickly before he silently shook his head.

“No. And it won’t be the last, but you don’t understand. Promise to keep your mouth shut and I’ll handle it myself eventually. Please Tamsin?”

Harry raised the hand that he was holding to his lips and kissed my fingertips. I stood to dress quickly and go back to Gemma’s room, kissing him without giving him a response to his question.
*End Flashback and Tamsin’s POV*

When Tamsin stopped talking, I found myself close to her again. So close that I could feel her breath fan across my face as she softly exhaled. My fingers traced over the curve of her lips as they did three years ago, but as I realized what I was doing, I removed my hand as quickly as I put it to her face and put an ample amount of space between us.

A tear rolled from Tamsin’s eyes as she rolled them at me before speaking again.

“I love you Harry. And I know you feel something for me...Say something!”

Before I could get a response out Zayn came into the back for his break, making both Tamsin and I awkwardly turn away from each other and allowing me a feeling of relief as I put my coat on and quickly left the bar with my broken phone and broken confidence in what I thought I knew.

Notes

Hi lovesssss UPDATE Because I'm home from school early on this beautiful Monday. How are you all? Sorry for the wait, but sometimes I enjoy keeping suspense alive. Soooo what did you think of this chapter??? (I hope you all do realize that the flashback was between Tamsin and Harry before he was diagnosed to be bipolar). What do you thin Harry was going to say to Tamsin in the flashback before she cut him off and what do you think that Harry was going to say to her before Zayn interrupted the two? What do you all think of Tamsin's confession? Did you see it coming? I want sooooo many COMMENTS on this guys so don't be shy! I won't bite you. Comments bring me Joy and inspiration. Also, Thank you all for the VOTES (please keep those coming as well!) Lost a SUB :( that made me sad so please Subscribe if you're reading and (hopefully) enjoying and make me happy again!! As always, I LOVE YOU ALL SO MUCH FOR READING!~Xx