*One Month Later*

"Anyway, I know I'm being totally paranoid. I'm probably just crazy, right? There's no way he was trying to kiss me. Plus it was a month ago and we never spoke of it again. The good news is things are not awkward at all between us anymore. I don't know what I was thinking. Imagine if Harry and I liked each other? It would be weird. We live in the same house. He got really cute though, mum." I whisper the last sentence and turn my head. I've been coming here a lot in the last few weeks. By here I mean my mom's grave. They called me when they put the tombstone in, so ever since I came to see it I've been visiting. Even though she's not there, it's nice to feel like I can talk to her still.

Whatever happened between Harry and I a few weeks ago at the fire hasn't happened anymore. We didn't talk about it and it didn't get weird between us. We actually got closer. We're really good friends now. Ty, Caroline and I have been hanging out with him and his friends quite a bit. I try my best to still keep to myself at school, but Niall and Louis are the loudest people ever and always end up drawing attention to me against my will. I turn red every time and now they just do it because they know they embarrass me.

"I realized that we never had a talk about parties and stuff," I continue. "I went to one right after you died. I felt really guilty. Is it okay for me to have fun like that? With you gone? I don't know. It feels weird because I have no idea what you think about it. You never told me. Mum, I feel so unsure of myself without you here. I don't know what I should and shouldn't do. I need your help."

I sit in silence for a minute or two, leaning my head back against the stone and absorbing the sun. It's been surprisingly nice these last few days and I tend to enjoy every second of sun I can get. It's still cold, but sun is a rare occasion here. I keep a blanket in my car so I can sit out here without my bum getting soaking wet.

"Okay, fine. Don't answer." I sigh and stand up. I rest my hand on the top and stare at her name. "I love you, mum. I miss you." I pat it once and gather my blanket and walk back to my car. I wonder if people think I'm crazy, coming here and just sitting for an hour and talking to no one. Maybe it's weird, but it's oddly comforting. I've surprised myself with the way I've handled my mom's death. I don't cry much anymore. Sometimes I feel guilty that I'm doing so well. I don't feel completely happy, but it's pretty close. Even though I had this tragic thing happen, I have so many other good things happening to me.

Like Liam. I've never had a boyfriend before and the kiss that Harry described at the campfire is the only one I've ever experienced. Ten years ago. Liam has been so nice to me; he walks me to class and we work on homework together all the time. He's at our house a lot. Harry joins us a lot of the time too. Liam is probably one of the nicest guys I've ever met. He's very considerate and he's so easy for me to talk to. I have no problem opening up to him, and that doesn't normally happen to me. We aren't together and he hasn't kissed me or anything yet, but sometimes when we're watching a movie he'll put his arm around me. We've held hands a few times when we've gone for walks together. It's comfortable. I like it.

I got my mom's car from the house, which I still haven't really touched. I can keep it as long as I want and I have no desire to go through all of those memories when I'm finally starting to feel okay about my life. I'm still sad and I don't want to make it worse. She rarely let me drive this car. I wonder what she would think of me owning it now. When I pull up to the house Harry's car is there, but not Anne's. She's been working like crazy for the last week and she said she's not sure how long it's going to last. She's barely home. I actually miss her...she's so nice.

"Ads?"

I hang up my keys and shut the front door. "Yeah, it's me!" I call back to Harry. He runs around the corner of the hallway and practically wipes out on his socks. "Slow down," I laugh. He grabs the top of my shoulders.

"Guess what!"

"Can you not yell at me?"

"Ads! Guess what!" he shouts again.

"I don't know...you finally learned how to tie your shoes?" He rolls his eyes and flicks my nose,. "Ow!"

"Can we be serious for like a second?" he asks.

"Okay fine, but only for like a second." I pause. "Okay, second's up." I smile and walk away from him, sliding my backpack on the table and walking to the fridge to get a snack.

"You're really mean right now," he says, following me. "I really do have something to tell you."

"Then tell me already."

"Fine! Geez. Okay, so you know how the winter formal is coming up?"

The one I'm not going to. "Yep. What about it?"

"Guess who is playing at it!"

"No way!"

He smiles from ear to ear and nods his head. "Yeah! Fuck, I have to go practice. I'll see you later."

I laugh as he runs back to the front door and leaves, probably to go to Louis' house. That's where they've been practicing. The guys are surprisingly musically talented. I haven't really heard them, but I've heard them tell me their talents. Harry, Niall and Liam can all play the guitar. Zayn plays the drums and sings. Louis plays piano and does back up vocals. Harry is the lead singer apparently, but I've never heard him sing. He refuses every time I ask him. They've been practicing a lot for the last few weeks, since they just started. They must be decent if the school is letting them play at the dance. The live act usually only plays a few songs at the beginning of the dancing part right after the dinner. This dance is more of a banquet type event. I didn't go last year and I have no intention of going this year.

I unload my stuff on the dining room table and start working on my homework. My teachers have been loading it on since the holidays are coming up. I could not be more excited. We have the rest of this week and all of next left, then Christmas. The formal is next Friday. Car has been begging me to go dress shopping with her all week. She lives for this kind of stuff. Speak of the devil,

"Hello Caroline," I say into my phone.

"Get your purse and meet me outside. I'll be at your house in two minutes."

"I'm doing homework."

"No, you're finding a dress for the formal." The formal is kind of like prom for all the non-seniors. It's exactly what it sounds like: formal. Long dresses, fancy hair, nice suits. They go all out.

"Car, I already told you that I'm not going."

"You realize that Liam is going to ask you to go with him, right?"

I sigh and smile slightly to myself. I do kind of like the idea of going if I have a date. But it's next weekend and he still hasn't said anything about it. Maybe we're just friends.

"Fine. I'll be waiting outside."

I leave my stuff on the table and run to my room to get my purse. I guess it wouldn't hurt to have a dress picked out just in case...

When Car and I get to the mall she takes me straight to one of the more expensive stores. Normally I would protest, but I have quite a bit of money from my monthly deposits from my mother's estate. She wouldn't mind. She loved this kind of stuff. She picks out like ten dresses for us each to try on and we go into the fitting rooms. Girls usually wear some sort of lighter colour; the closer to white the better. It's a whole winter theme. The popular girls usually go in something red or purple so that they stand out. It's so annoying. Just follow the damn rules. Caroline loves everything she tries on, but she decides on a fitted tight dress that's a crisp white. It's got cutouts in the back and a sweetheart neckline that accentuates her body perfectly. She looks like a model.

"I have one more," I announce, going back in and taking off the latest rejection. Caroline says I need to look 'hotter than hot' so that I out dress Courtney. She's still shamelessly throwing herself at Harry, who Car is convinced likes me. We've been over it a thousand time. Harry and I are just friends. "It's not white, though. Is that okay?"

"Well let's see it and find out."

I zip it up on the side and open the curtain before looking at myself. Caroline's mouth drops open. I feel myself blush out of self-consciousness. I don't like people staring at me.

"Holy shit!" she says suddenly, standing from her chair. She pulls me over to the big mirror and stares at my reflection. I'm not even sure if it is mine. The gown is more of a gold colour, with a beautiful belt a few inches below my bust. The top is sequinned with long pieces and the bottom is very light and flowy. It almost sparkles.

"It's so perfect," Caroline says. "You bitch, you're going to be the hottest girl there. Every guy is going to be drooling."

"And that's a good thing?"

"Yes!" She practically screams. "You're getting it. You don't even have a choice."

---

"So, who are you going with to the formal?" I ask Harry while we eat dinner. He cooked again. He made us pizza this time.

He shrugs. "I didn't ask anyone."

"Yet?" He shrugs again. "You don't want to go with anyone?"

"I don't know."

I narrow my eyes at him and put my slice down. "Harry, do you like someone?" He shrugs again and stuffs some food into his mouth. "You totally do!" I shout, smacking his arm.

"Shut up, Ads," he says, turning red and swatting me away.

"Who is it?"

"No one."

"Harry."

"What?" I raise my eyebrows at him and he avoids my gaze. "It's not a big deal. She's already going with someone."

I frown and stop my teasing. "Oh. Sorry, that sucks."

"Yeah."

We eat in silence for a few minutes while we eat. I wonder who it is...couldn't be Courtney. She drives him crazy and she doesn't have a date yet because she's still trying to convince Harry to go with her. So pathetic.

"Well, I'm sure she'll see you all dashing in your suit on stage and ditch her date."

He laughs humourlessly and looks at me with sad eyes. "I don't see that happening.

Wow, he really does sound sad. I wasn't expecting that. "Are you...are you okay?" I ask, serous now. "You really like this girl, don't you?"

He nods and stares into my eyes. "I really do." After a minute I tear my eyes away and start eating again. Poor Harry. He doesn't actually like girls very often according to the boys. When he does, he takes it seriously. He would probably be an amazing boyfriend; he's really sweet when he wants to be.

"I'm going to work on my homework,: I inform him, putting my dish away and wrapping up the leftovers. He just nods and remains silent as I walk back to my room. He really seems sad. I feel bad for him. I decide to text Louis and see if Harry's been acting weird lately. After my first text he decides to call me instead.

"What's up?" he says happily.

"I was just wondering...has Harry been acting weird lately?"

"How do you mean?"

'Well...he just seems kind of sad." Lou doesn't respond. All I can hear is his breathing. "Louis?"

"What did you say? What were you talking about?" he asks, tone serious. That doesn't happen often.

"We were talking about the formal. I asked who he was going with but he said the girl he likes is already going with someone."

"Ah." I wait for him to elaborate on that syllable, but he doesn't.

"Louis?"

"Yes?"

I roll my eyes. "Do you know anything about this?"

"Uh, no not really. Just out of curiosity, has Liam asked you yet?"

"No, is he planning to?"

"What do you think?" he asks, laughing at me ignorance. "I have to go, Adie. I'll see you at school tomorrow." He hangs up before I can say anything else. Well, that helped nothing. That raises more questions than anything else.

Harry's POV

I raise my head from it's resting position on my arms when my phone vibrates on the counter next to me.

"What do you want, Louis?"

"Are you sad?"

"What?"

"You know that Liam hasn't asked Adie yet, right?"

I sigh and pinch the bridge of my nose. "That's not true."

"Yes it is, I just talked to Adie. She said he hasn't asked her."

I pull my eyebrows together in confusion. He told me a few days ago that he asked Adie already. Why would he lie about that? My friendship with Liam has been a little...strained as of late. He's basically in love with Adie and he knows that I like her too. He's been rubbing it my face in very subtle ways for the last month in a way that none of the other guys notice. I had my chance to tell him to back off. Why didn't I take it?

"He told me that he did," I tell Louis. "That's weird."

"That is weird. Look, I know you don't want me to say anything to anyone, but do you want me to talk to Liam?"

"No!" Louis is the only one that knows how I feel about Adie. We're best friends; he noticed of course. I tried to deny it but he knows me far too well. I made him swear not to tell anyone and not to talk to Liam about it. If Adie likes me then she wouldn't be with Liam all the time, but she is. So she must like him. It sucks.

"Fine, but are you going to do something about it? I'm tired of your moping."

"Then don't pay attention."

"Haz, just tell her already. You almost kissed, didn't you?"

"Yeah. Almost."

"She didn't stop you, though. You were interrupted."

"And then she basically ran away." If only Tyler had come outside like ten seconds later. That's all I needed. He ruined my moment. The killer part is Adie is totally comfortable around me now. We hang out all the time. We live together so obviously we see a lot of each other. She's amazing. Wow, I'm such a girl.

Louis sighs and I can practically hear him roll his eyes. "If you're not going to do anything about it, then move on. You can't just sit around and wait for her to be done with Liam. What happens if they start dating? Then you've really lost your chance. She'll be off limits forever."

Fucking guy code. He's got a point, though. If I'm going to do something about this it need to be before Liam asks her out. The dance doesn't count, does it? Maybe I should just ask her. But then she'll know I like her because of that little conversation we just had...

Damn it. This is why I avoid this shit.

"Yeah. I'll figure something out. I'll see you at school tomorrow, Lou." I hang up and go to my room to start doing my work, but can't help but think about Adie. She's doing homework, right? Might as well do it together...

Her door is slightly open. I push it open more; she's laying on her stomach on her bed facing away from me with her books in front of her. "Ads?"

She jumps a little and spins around. I chuckle; she's always so jumpy.

"What's up?" she asks, turning back to her books.

"Do you mind if I do my work in here? I'm lonely." I sound pathetic. She turns her head slightly and smiles while nodding, biting on the tip of her pen. She really doesn't make this easy on me. She's so hot and she doesn't even try. Whenever we're home she's in pyjamas or sweats or something and she barely wears any make up. She's just beautiful. All the time. Sometimes it's annoying. Give me a break! I sit on the floor against the side of the bed, looking out the window. I open up my books and start reading, very away of her over my shoulder.

Suddenly she flicks the back of my head. "Ow! What was that for?"

"You're doing it again!" I laugh and turn to look at her over my shoulder. She looks annoyed. "How many times do I have to tell you?"

"Sorry," I laugh, turning back around. I have this habit of clicking my pen a lot and fast when I'm studying. I don't even realize I'm doing it, but she absolutely hates it. After that first week of her living here, things got super comfortable between us. It's like we never stopped being friends. I would say she's like my sister, but I like her so that would be kind of weird. That's how close we are, though. I finally feel like we can really talk to each other. About everything. Except Liam, I hate it when she talks to me about him. I think she noticed, because she stopped doing over the last week or so. Thank goodness.

"Are you doing history?" I ask without looking at her.

"Yeah I'm trying."

I stand and take my notebook and pen with me so I can lay on my stomach beside her. She gives me a questioning look. "What? I need help." She rolls her eyes and smiles while pushing her textbook to the middle of the bed.

"I don't know how much help I'll be. I have no idea what he wants for this."

"Aren't you supposed to be smart?" I tease.

"Aren't you supposed to be..." she thinks for a minute before paying face down on the bed. "I can't think of an insult. I'm so tired and I think my brain is fried."

I laugh and rub her back. "One more week." She sits up and nods her head, biting the top of her pen again and staring at the book. I remove my hand before she starts to feel weird about it, but it makes me a tiny bit sad to end the contact.

I'm in trouble.

Notes

double updateeeee. get the votes and subscriptions up and it'll be a triple ;)

harry is in loveeeeeee
just kidding not in love. in serious like.

let me know what you think!!!!!!! shits gonna go downnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn at the formal let me tell you.

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thanks for readingg <3