Breathe
Young
He stills, and very slowly all the color drains from his face – uh oh.
“When?” He whispers, ashen.
“ Today, at the hospital” I gulp down a sip of the cool water. His stance changes immediately, his eyes hardening to a flint. “ Is that why you took so long?” he snarls and I slowly nod
Oh, shit.
“ So you lied”, I just gaze at him, unable to speak he’s mad-really mad. “ Do you love him?” His voice catches with panic “ No, I love you” I speak out quietly. “ Did you do anything with him?” .. Excuse me?, now I’m angry.
“ Are you fucking kidding me Harry?” I snap and his eyes widen in shock, I stand abruptly and walk towards the door, he stands and blocks the way. “Where are you going” He hisses, “ Away from you, how could you say something like that?!” I shout at him tears forming in my eyes “ You think I’d cheat on you?” I breathe and swipe away a loose tear. He closes his eyes and looks to the floor. Ah..
“ Let me leave Harry” I step closer to the door “ No” He says softly holding his arms out, I whirl around “ Don’t you dare touch me” He steps forwards away from the door and I take my chance and leave.
I hear him almost as soon as I leave the room his foot steps following me, I reach the exit of the restaurant and turn to see he’s been slowed down by fans, quickly I go opposite the way we came and start running.
I stop running after 20 minutes, quickly I take out my phone and notice all the missed notifications.
From: Harry <3
Where are you?, tell me now
From: Harry <3
I didn’t mean to react like that I’m sorry, now please tell me where you are we’re all worried. I’m worried.
From: Niall Horan
Nina what happened, where are you I’ll come get you
From: El
You need to call Harry right now
From: Dani
Nina you don’t know London, call Harry
From: Louis Tomlinson
Call NOW, Liam and I are looking for you. This isn’t funny
From: Zayn Malik
Yell and fight with Harry at the apartment, I don’t want anything bad happening to you, London is scary at night please call one of us.
From: Liam Payne
Harry is freaking out, you need to get in contact and tell us where you are
I read all the messages and sigh, I reach a park where I take refuge on the bench. I scroll through my contacts and click on Max, I hit call.
Ring..Ring..Ring..Ring..
“ NINA!” Max screams into the phone I distance it from my ear and flinch “ Hey I’m lost, do you think you could come get me?” I sigh, Harrys not going to be happy about this.. my subconscious growls at me.
“ Yeah where are you?” I look around to see If I can find a land mark “ Well I’m by at the park on Westminster Road” I fidget with my fingers “ Oh yeah I know where you are, stay there I’ll come get you”. He hands up and I put my head in my hands. Harry got upset with me over nothing, I clench my eyes and recall all the events leading up to this. My phone rings and I look down to see it’s Harry, quickly I hit ignore.
-
“NINA” I notice a black car pull up and honk, I smile and wave at Max before walking to the car I notice three people in the back seats.
“ Hello lovely” He says as I step in the car. “ This is Taylor, Jesse and Mike” He points to the three boys in the back, all three of the boys look to have built bodies, Taylor and Jesse have brown hair and Mike’s hair is blonde. I flash them small smiles. “ Wanna come to a party?” Max winks at me, I close my eyes briefly- Harrys already going to kill me anyways. “ Sure” I smile at him. “ Why are you so dressed up?” Mike asks me from the backseat, “ I was on a date” I answer honestly “ With that Styles guy?” Max questions, I nod. “ Date gone wrong?, is that why you’re here?” Taylor pipes up and once again I nod.
We pull up to a large suburban house with so many people inside it it’s over flowing, I step out, and I can already hear the music. Max pulls on my arm and leads me through the loud crowed partying on the lawn. As soon as I enter the door of the house the smell of alcohol and burning weed. I choke back the urge to cough. Max looks down at me.
“ Do you want a drink?” He asks as we approach a large table filled with every kind of alcohol possible. I nod slowly, “ You don’t talk much” He laughs at me while pouring a clear substance into a glass. He hands me the shot and I take it back fast, I hold it out to him for another one. He pours and I repeat.
-
“ Maaaxxx” I slur and push him onto the couch away from me, I giggle and join him, he grabs my hips and pulls me down onto his lap. My subconscious punctures me deep in my stomach, this is wrong. A group of people enter the room and sit around us, Max says hi to them, I’m assuming they know each other. I flash a shy smile around, these people give off a bad vibe. I take out my phone and notice the time 3:09am, I gasp at all the missed calls and texts I have, quickly without reading or opening them I throw my phone back into my dress pocket – I can’t deal with them while I’m drunk. I shift myself off Max’s lap and down the rest of my drink before grabbing another.
When I return I notice them sitting on the floor around the coffee table, a white powdery substance arranged into lines has appeared on the table. Fear rises through me and I don’t feel safe, - They’re doing fucking cocaine. I take a deep breath and a step backwards. “ Nina are you going to do a line?” Max puts his arm out and hands me a small white straw like object. I shake my head and hand it back to him- I need to get out of here, I start to panic. “ I’ll be right back” I slur at them before stumbling out of the room, I grab two shots and throw them back before tripping my way into a bathroom.
I take out my phone and run through my notifications, who do I call. I run back my finger along the boy’s names, I can’t call Harry. Quickly I press on Louis’s number. He answers on the first ring.
“ Where the fuck are you” He snarls – uh oh. “Louis” I slur “ Are you drunk?” He whispers shocked, tears prick my eyes. “ I’m scared” I say quietly. “ Tell me where you are Zayn and I will come get you” I hear shuffling in the background and then I hear him, yelling “ Is that Nina?!?” Harry sounds injured. “ I don’t want Harry coming” My voice cracks. “No he wont come, it’ll just be me and Zayn I promise, now can you tell me where you are love?” He says softer and the tears flow down my face “I don’t know where I am” I cry. “ Stop crying and think Nina” He says, tone forceful. I sniffle and glance out the window “I’m at a house party by Kings School” I look up and notice the room is spinning. “ I know exactly where you are, we’re on our way” He hangs up.
I slide down the wall and surrender to the tears, I feel my body get heavy and the a ball form in the middle of my throat. I cough three times before arching my back over the toilet and throw up. I choke back tears as I retreat to the corner of the room. I feel myself slipping, my eyes getting heavy, I bring my knees up to my chin and bat my eyes three times before giving up.
-
“ Nina, Nina, Nina wake up” I feel a pair of hands shake my shoulders, I shoot my eyes open to be met with Louis and Zayn hovering over me, fear traced in their looks. I blink up at them before hurling myself at Louis, crying, I wrap my arms around his neck. “ Thank god you’re safe” He whispers in my ear. He slips his arm under my knees and follows Zayn out of the bathroom.
“I’m going to throw up” I warn them as we step outside, Louis props me upright and Zayn grabs my hair out of the line of fire. “ Nina where are you going?!” I hear Max, I shake my head and the urge to vomit comes up again. “ She’s going home” Zayn says sternly to him “ I can take her” He slurs. “ No you cant, and you’re not. She’s not your responsibility so back off” Zayn pushes his shoulders backwards. I feel Louis hand stroke my back soothingly “ Ready to go love?” He asks after the vomiting seizes.
I nod and he scoops me back up into his arms. “ Zayn, leave him he’s drunk” Louis calls back. I feel myself shift and Louis places me in the backseat of the car, I stretch out and yawn. The opposite door swings open and through my blurry vision I see Zayn slide in the seat beside me. I wiggle my way up and rest my head on his lap. The car starts moving and it brings my drunken body un-comfort, I clench onto Zayns hand.
-
“ Give her to me” I hear Harrys persistent voice and another two arms around me. “ I can take her” Louis’s voice is forceful “ She’s my girlfriend” He pushes, “ You’re too angry with her, I’m going to go put her in your bed” Louis reasons with him.
He sets me on the bed gently and my body curls around the duvet. “ Take it easy on her” I hear Louis speak. “ Where was she?” I hear Harrys deep pained voice “ At a house party by St. Kings school with Max” Louis divulges “ She was crying and passed out in the bathroom, Max was piss drunk” he continues and I mentally kick myself. “ Thanks Louis” Harry says icily dismissing him.
-
I wake with a start. It’s light and my head throbs, aching at my temples. Oh no. I hope I don’t have a hangover. Slowly I open my eyes and notice the chair by the window has moved and Harry is sitting in it against the wall. He’s still wearing his clothes from the date, his bow tie is peeping out of the breast pocket on his coat. Is this a dream. His left arm hangs over the arm of the chair. One long leg is crossed at the ankle over his knee. His right elbow rest on the arm of the chair, his hand up to his chin. His green eyes burn in the light of the early morning and chills run down my spine. His expression is unreadable.
My heart almost stops, how long has he been watching me sleep?
“ Hi” I whisper.
He regards me coolly and my heart stutters. Oh no. He removes his hand from his chin and turns his head away from me. There is silence for 3 minutes as he sits back and continues to regard me with his impassive expression.
“Hello” he says finally, his voice is hushed. He’s mad. Really mad.
“ You’re here” I choke
“ It would appear so”
Slowly I pull myself into a sitting position not taking my eyes off him, my throat burns and my mouth is dry. “ How long have you been watching me sleep?” I pause. “ Long enough”
“ You’re mad” I can hardly speak the words. “Mad,” he speaks, as if testing the word and its meaning. “ No Nina, I’m way beyond mad” I try to swallow, which is hard with a dry mouth. “ Way beyond mad doesn’t sound very pleasing”
He gazes at me, face like concrete and doesn’t respond. A silence starks over us. I grab the glass of water on the nightstand and take a cooling sip. I try to steady my breath before looking at him once more. “ I’m sorry” I try a different tack. “ Are you?” He says icily. I shake my head “No”
“ Why say it then?”
“ Because I don’t want you to be mad at me”, he sighs heavily and relieves some tension in the room.
“I didn’t mean for all that to happen”
“ I’m sure you didn’t”
“ Harry please…”
“ Please what?”
“ Don’t be so cold.”
His eyebrows rise in surprise. “ Nina I’m so mad, cold isn’t what I feel at this moment. I don’t know how to deal with these”- he waves his hand, searching for the word- “Feelings” His tone is harsh.
His honesty disarms me. All I want to do is crawl into his lap. To hell with this. I move, taking him by surprise and climbing awkwardly into his lap where I curl up. He doesn’t push me away, which is what I feared the most. After a couple seconds he folds his arms around my and buries his nose in my hair. I wrap my arms around his neck and cuddle into the crook of his shoulder as he sighs once more. “ What am I going to do with you Nina” He kisses the top of my head. I nuzzle into him more.
“ I’m still mad at you” He breathes “ I know” I whisper, “I’m mad at you too” I add. “ What have I done to deserve your anger?” He stills. “ I’ll tell you later when you’ve calmed down. I kiss his throat, his eyes shut and he leans into the kiss but makes no move to kiss me. His arms tighten, squeezing me.
“ When I think of what could’ve happened to you” His voice is broken and raw
“ I’m okay.”
“Nina” It’s almost a sob.
“I’m fine I promise”
“ No thanks to Louis and Zayn” His voice is sarcastic, cold.
“ What do you mean” I snap
“ I don’t want to argue about this right now, Nina”
I blink, well maybe I do. I decide against it and a large yawn moves through me. He kisses my forehead. “ Back to bed, you didn’t get home till late” He moves quickly taking me with him, he places me back on the bed.
“ Lie down with me?” I pout. “ No I have things to do” He turns away from me. “ Are you still mad at me?” He stops in the doorway, “Yes”. I turn away from him and push my face into the pillow, I hear him try to suppress a laugh before the door closes.
“When?” He whispers, ashen.
“ Today, at the hospital” I gulp down a sip of the cool water. His stance changes immediately, his eyes hardening to a flint. “ Is that why you took so long?” he snarls and I slowly nod
Oh, shit.
“ So you lied”, I just gaze at him, unable to speak he’s mad-really mad. “ Do you love him?” His voice catches with panic “ No, I love you” I speak out quietly. “ Did you do anything with him?” .. Excuse me?, now I’m angry.
“ Are you fucking kidding me Harry?” I snap and his eyes widen in shock, I stand abruptly and walk towards the door, he stands and blocks the way. “Where are you going” He hisses, “ Away from you, how could you say something like that?!” I shout at him tears forming in my eyes “ You think I’d cheat on you?” I breathe and swipe away a loose tear. He closes his eyes and looks to the floor. Ah..
“ Let me leave Harry” I step closer to the door “ No” He says softly holding his arms out, I whirl around “ Don’t you dare touch me” He steps forwards away from the door and I take my chance and leave.
I hear him almost as soon as I leave the room his foot steps following me, I reach the exit of the restaurant and turn to see he’s been slowed down by fans, quickly I go opposite the way we came and start running.
I stop running after 20 minutes, quickly I take out my phone and notice all the missed notifications.
From: Harry <3
Where are you?, tell me now
From: Harry <3
I didn’t mean to react like that I’m sorry, now please tell me where you are we’re all worried. I’m worried.
From: Niall Horan
Nina what happened, where are you I’ll come get you
From: El
You need to call Harry right now
From: Dani
Nina you don’t know London, call Harry
From: Louis Tomlinson
Call NOW, Liam and I are looking for you. This isn’t funny
From: Zayn Malik
Yell and fight with Harry at the apartment, I don’t want anything bad happening to you, London is scary at night please call one of us.
From: Liam Payne
Harry is freaking out, you need to get in contact and tell us where you are
I read all the messages and sigh, I reach a park where I take refuge on the bench. I scroll through my contacts and click on Max, I hit call.
Ring..Ring..Ring..Ring..
“ NINA!” Max screams into the phone I distance it from my ear and flinch “ Hey I’m lost, do you think you could come get me?” I sigh, Harrys not going to be happy about this.. my subconscious growls at me.
“ Yeah where are you?” I look around to see If I can find a land mark “ Well I’m by at the park on Westminster Road” I fidget with my fingers “ Oh yeah I know where you are, stay there I’ll come get you”. He hands up and I put my head in my hands. Harry got upset with me over nothing, I clench my eyes and recall all the events leading up to this. My phone rings and I look down to see it’s Harry, quickly I hit ignore.
-
“NINA” I notice a black car pull up and honk, I smile and wave at Max before walking to the car I notice three people in the back seats.
“ Hello lovely” He says as I step in the car. “ This is Taylor, Jesse and Mike” He points to the three boys in the back, all three of the boys look to have built bodies, Taylor and Jesse have brown hair and Mike’s hair is blonde. I flash them small smiles. “ Wanna come to a party?” Max winks at me, I close my eyes briefly- Harrys already going to kill me anyways. “ Sure” I smile at him. “ Why are you so dressed up?” Mike asks me from the backseat, “ I was on a date” I answer honestly “ With that Styles guy?” Max questions, I nod. “ Date gone wrong?, is that why you’re here?” Taylor pipes up and once again I nod.
We pull up to a large suburban house with so many people inside it it’s over flowing, I step out, and I can already hear the music. Max pulls on my arm and leads me through the loud crowed partying on the lawn. As soon as I enter the door of the house the smell of alcohol and burning weed. I choke back the urge to cough. Max looks down at me.
“ Do you want a drink?” He asks as we approach a large table filled with every kind of alcohol possible. I nod slowly, “ You don’t talk much” He laughs at me while pouring a clear substance into a glass. He hands me the shot and I take it back fast, I hold it out to him for another one. He pours and I repeat.
-
“ Maaaxxx” I slur and push him onto the couch away from me, I giggle and join him, he grabs my hips and pulls me down onto his lap. My subconscious punctures me deep in my stomach, this is wrong. A group of people enter the room and sit around us, Max says hi to them, I’m assuming they know each other. I flash a shy smile around, these people give off a bad vibe. I take out my phone and notice the time 3:09am, I gasp at all the missed calls and texts I have, quickly without reading or opening them I throw my phone back into my dress pocket – I can’t deal with them while I’m drunk. I shift myself off Max’s lap and down the rest of my drink before grabbing another.
When I return I notice them sitting on the floor around the coffee table, a white powdery substance arranged into lines has appeared on the table. Fear rises through me and I don’t feel safe, - They’re doing fucking cocaine. I take a deep breath and a step backwards. “ Nina are you going to do a line?” Max puts his arm out and hands me a small white straw like object. I shake my head and hand it back to him- I need to get out of here, I start to panic. “ I’ll be right back” I slur at them before stumbling out of the room, I grab two shots and throw them back before tripping my way into a bathroom.
I take out my phone and run through my notifications, who do I call. I run back my finger along the boy’s names, I can’t call Harry. Quickly I press on Louis’s number. He answers on the first ring.
“ Where the fuck are you” He snarls – uh oh. “Louis” I slur “ Are you drunk?” He whispers shocked, tears prick my eyes. “ I’m scared” I say quietly. “ Tell me where you are Zayn and I will come get you” I hear shuffling in the background and then I hear him, yelling “ Is that Nina?!?” Harry sounds injured. “ I don’t want Harry coming” My voice cracks. “No he wont come, it’ll just be me and Zayn I promise, now can you tell me where you are love?” He says softer and the tears flow down my face “I don’t know where I am” I cry. “ Stop crying and think Nina” He says, tone forceful. I sniffle and glance out the window “I’m at a house party by Kings School” I look up and notice the room is spinning. “ I know exactly where you are, we’re on our way” He hangs up.
I slide down the wall and surrender to the tears, I feel my body get heavy and the a ball form in the middle of my throat. I cough three times before arching my back over the toilet and throw up. I choke back tears as I retreat to the corner of the room. I feel myself slipping, my eyes getting heavy, I bring my knees up to my chin and bat my eyes three times before giving up.
-
“ Nina, Nina, Nina wake up” I feel a pair of hands shake my shoulders, I shoot my eyes open to be met with Louis and Zayn hovering over me, fear traced in their looks. I blink up at them before hurling myself at Louis, crying, I wrap my arms around his neck. “ Thank god you’re safe” He whispers in my ear. He slips his arm under my knees and follows Zayn out of the bathroom.
“I’m going to throw up” I warn them as we step outside, Louis props me upright and Zayn grabs my hair out of the line of fire. “ Nina where are you going?!” I hear Max, I shake my head and the urge to vomit comes up again. “ She’s going home” Zayn says sternly to him “ I can take her” He slurs. “ No you cant, and you’re not. She’s not your responsibility so back off” Zayn pushes his shoulders backwards. I feel Louis hand stroke my back soothingly “ Ready to go love?” He asks after the vomiting seizes.
I nod and he scoops me back up into his arms. “ Zayn, leave him he’s drunk” Louis calls back. I feel myself shift and Louis places me in the backseat of the car, I stretch out and yawn. The opposite door swings open and through my blurry vision I see Zayn slide in the seat beside me. I wiggle my way up and rest my head on his lap. The car starts moving and it brings my drunken body un-comfort, I clench onto Zayns hand.
-
“ Give her to me” I hear Harrys persistent voice and another two arms around me. “ I can take her” Louis’s voice is forceful “ She’s my girlfriend” He pushes, “ You’re too angry with her, I’m going to go put her in your bed” Louis reasons with him.
He sets me on the bed gently and my body curls around the duvet. “ Take it easy on her” I hear Louis speak. “ Where was she?” I hear Harrys deep pained voice “ At a house party by St. Kings school with Max” Louis divulges “ She was crying and passed out in the bathroom, Max was piss drunk” he continues and I mentally kick myself. “ Thanks Louis” Harry says icily dismissing him.
-
I wake with a start. It’s light and my head throbs, aching at my temples. Oh no. I hope I don’t have a hangover. Slowly I open my eyes and notice the chair by the window has moved and Harry is sitting in it against the wall. He’s still wearing his clothes from the date, his bow tie is peeping out of the breast pocket on his coat. Is this a dream. His left arm hangs over the arm of the chair. One long leg is crossed at the ankle over his knee. His right elbow rest on the arm of the chair, his hand up to his chin. His green eyes burn in the light of the early morning and chills run down my spine. His expression is unreadable.
My heart almost stops, how long has he been watching me sleep?
“ Hi” I whisper.
He regards me coolly and my heart stutters. Oh no. He removes his hand from his chin and turns his head away from me. There is silence for 3 minutes as he sits back and continues to regard me with his impassive expression.
“Hello” he says finally, his voice is hushed. He’s mad. Really mad.
“ You’re here” I choke
“ It would appear so”
Slowly I pull myself into a sitting position not taking my eyes off him, my throat burns and my mouth is dry. “ How long have you been watching me sleep?” I pause. “ Long enough”
“ You’re mad” I can hardly speak the words. “Mad,” he speaks, as if testing the word and its meaning. “ No Nina, I’m way beyond mad” I try to swallow, which is hard with a dry mouth. “ Way beyond mad doesn’t sound very pleasing”
He gazes at me, face like concrete and doesn’t respond. A silence starks over us. I grab the glass of water on the nightstand and take a cooling sip. I try to steady my breath before looking at him once more. “ I’m sorry” I try a different tack. “ Are you?” He says icily. I shake my head “No”
“ Why say it then?”
“ Because I don’t want you to be mad at me”, he sighs heavily and relieves some tension in the room.
“I didn’t mean for all that to happen”
“ I’m sure you didn’t”
“ Harry please…”
“ Please what?”
“ Don’t be so cold.”
His eyebrows rise in surprise. “ Nina I’m so mad, cold isn’t what I feel at this moment. I don’t know how to deal with these”- he waves his hand, searching for the word- “Feelings” His tone is harsh.
His honesty disarms me. All I want to do is crawl into his lap. To hell with this. I move, taking him by surprise and climbing awkwardly into his lap where I curl up. He doesn’t push me away, which is what I feared the most. After a couple seconds he folds his arms around my and buries his nose in my hair. I wrap my arms around his neck and cuddle into the crook of his shoulder as he sighs once more. “ What am I going to do with you Nina” He kisses the top of my head. I nuzzle into him more.
“ I’m still mad at you” He breathes “ I know” I whisper, “I’m mad at you too” I add. “ What have I done to deserve your anger?” He stills. “ I’ll tell you later when you’ve calmed down. I kiss his throat, his eyes shut and he leans into the kiss but makes no move to kiss me. His arms tighten, squeezing me.
“ When I think of what could’ve happened to you” His voice is broken and raw
“ I’m okay.”
“Nina” It’s almost a sob.
“I’m fine I promise”
“ No thanks to Louis and Zayn” His voice is sarcastic, cold.
“ What do you mean” I snap
“ I don’t want to argue about this right now, Nina”
I blink, well maybe I do. I decide against it and a large yawn moves through me. He kisses my forehead. “ Back to bed, you didn’t get home till late” He moves quickly taking me with him, he places me back on the bed.
“ Lie down with me?” I pout. “ No I have things to do” He turns away from me. “ Are you still mad at me?” He stops in the doorway, “Yes”. I turn away from him and push my face into the pillow, I hear him try to suppress a laugh before the door closes.
@march5th
Please update again pwease!
2/22/16