Best Friends Forever

Iris’ P.O.V.

The next few weeks it went like this. Sometimes I went to school and sometimes not. When I was at school, I didn’t talk to the girls. I didn’t want anything to do with Lucie. Correction, I didn’t want anything to do with them. Lucie had told Anna, Sophie and Michelle about what happened and about me using drugs. They all disapprove drugs, so they certainly didn’t like it. They were nothing to me. When Justin and I skipped school, we hung out with his friends, walked around town or stole something from a store. Today Justin and I had gone to school, but in the evening we went to see a movie at the cinema. Justin chose the movie and chose a horror one, which I absolutely hated. “Seriously?”, I asked when we walked into the cinema room. “I will protect you”, he said with a smirk. “You know I hate horror movies”, I said while slapping him on his arm. “You should get over your fear”, he responded. I looked at him with an angry look, but immediately started laughing. I just couldn’t be angry with him.
“Okay, that was as scary as fuck”, I said as we walked out of the cinema. “But thank you for protecting me”, I said grinning. I grabbed his hand and kissed him on the lips. “You wanna go to my place tonight?”, he asked. “Yeah, that’d be nice”, I responded smiling. When we were at his house, we went up to his room and sat down on his bed. “Come here”, Justin said and pulled me towards him. “I’m so in love with you. You’re absolutely amazing”, he continued and started kissing me. Not just on the lips, but he placed kisses everywhere. It caused me to giggle. Without saying a word Justin pulled out his shirt. Without thinking I did the same. In a minute he was in his underwear and I in my panties and bra. We started kissing again and lay down on his bed. At that moment he also pulled out his boxer short and was about to untie my bra. “Wait”, I interrupted him. “What’s wrong?”, he asked. He sounded a little edgy. “It’s going too fast. I’m not ready yet”, I answered softly. “Just take a pill and relax”, he said. “You can’t just take a pill for everything. It’s not a solution to everything. It’s my first time and you want me to just take a pill and relax? You’re crazy”, I responded angrily. “Get out!”, he suddenly screamed. “You have no idea how much I want to!”, I screamed back at him. I grabbed my clothes and bag as fast as I could, pulled on my clothes on my way downstairs and ran outside. Once I got outside I burst out in tears. I grabbed my phone out of my pocket and dialled the first number that popped into my head. I was surprised the phone was being picked up. “Lucie, I’m so so sorry for being an unbearable bitch”, I said while crying heavily. “Iris, what’s wrong?”, Lucie asked me worried. “Can I come over?”, I asked. “Yes of course”, she answered. “Thanks”, I said and I hung up. I didn’t want to talk about this on the phone. I had to see my best friend face to face. She was the only one who could calm me down right now. I walked to her house since Justin had driven us to the cinema and his house. It was a pretty long walk, so I arrived at her house half an hour later. I was about to ring the doorbell, but Lucie was faster. She let me in and we went upstairs without saying a word. Once we sat down on her bed, I began speaking. “Justin is a complete asshole. He wanted to have sex with me, but I said I wasn’t ready. I really wasn’t. It would be my first time. Well, he didn’t take it easily. He said I should take a pill and relax, but that made me so mad. You can’t control everything with drugs. So he got mad too and screamed at me to get out”, I explained while crying again. “Are you fucking kidding me?”, Lucie responded. I looked at her and her face was angry. No, it was furious. I had never seen her like this before. “I will kill that boy the next time I see him”, she said. “I’m so sorry I got mad at you because you had an opinion about Justin. You were so right. Like you always are. I was being a real bitch, for no reason. I hope you will forgive me…”, I responded slowly. “You know how hard it was to see you change? Those pills made you aggressive and you didn’t give a damn fuck about me, the girls or anything else. I thought you were throwing away your life. I cried every night because I was losing my best friend. But, I do want to forgive you, if you stop taking drugs and focus on your school and your friends again”, Lucie said. I saw tears had formed in her eyes. “I want nothing more”, I responded. “Come here”, she said and pulled me into a big hug. “You have no idea how much I missed you”, she whispered. “I missed you too”, I whispered back smiling. “It’s Friday. What about a movie night and sleepover?”, Lucie suggested. Friday night was our usual night together where we would watch movies until we fell asleep. “Great idea”, I said smiling. “Wait, can I borrow your phone for a sec?”, Lucie asked. “Yeah of course”, I said while handing it over to her. Ten seconds later I got it back. I saw that she had written a message to Justin. If you ever fucking touch her again, I will fucking kill you. L. “He’s definitely past tense”, I said and deleted him out of my contacts. “That’s how I wanna hear it”, Lucie said and gave me a smile. “Zac Efron movie night?”, I suggested. “Absolutely”, she responded with a grin.
The next morning I woke up to see that Lucie was already out of bed. I walked downstairs and saw that she was busy in the kitchen. “You’re awake early”, I said. “You’re awake late”, she responded. We laughed. “What are you making?”, I asked her. “Pancakes. You need some comfort food”, she answered. She put the pancakes on the plates and we sat down on the couch. “Tell me honestly. Did you really like Justin?”, she asked me. “I don’t know. My head is a complete mess right now. I guess I did. He made me move my limits, but he went too far. Or I went too far. I was ‘going with the flow’. In the beginning I thought a few pills were harmless, but I got addicted to it and it changed me. The pills made me stop thinking. So maybe I already knew somehow that this was going the wrong way, but my feelings were just numb. Last night when we were on his bed, I knew that this is not how I wanted it. Maybe I told him to stop because I’m really not ready or maybe I told him to stop because I knew he was wrong and he made me do wrong things. It’s just all a blur”, I explained. “If you were in that bed with Harry, would you tell Harry to stop?”, Lucie asked. “I’m sorry. Was that wrong to ask?”, she added immediately. “No, it’s okay. Actually I think that I would tell Harry to go further. Harry and I were so solid, even though we weren’t really together. Thinking about it now, my relationship with Justin was based on drugs, alcohol and having fun. We never really talked about feelings or stuff like that”, I responded. “You and Harry maybe weren’t officially together, but I guess you – and also Harry – did feel that way in your heart”, Lucie said. “You really do know where to hit the weak spot, don’t you?”, I asked Lucie laughing. “That’s what you get when you’ve been best friends for 17 years”, she responded with a grin. “Thanks. For everything. For being my best friend for 17 years and not giving up on me”, I said smiling. “That’s what best friends are for”, she responded. We hugged each other.

The next weeks I was doing perfectly fine. I stopped using drugs and I was totally focused on school again. I promised myself that I would never ever skip classes again. I did all my homework and whenever I had some free time, I spent it with Lucie, Anna, Michelle and Sophie. Luckily they all forgave me and they were happy I was back to the old me. We regularly went shopping in Paris, had endless movie nights or went out in the weekends. My parents noticed I was really living and loving life again and they were very happy about it. I talked to them about Justin once. They told me they were very worried and didn’t know what to do, but since it was over now we decided to forget about it. A new chapter of my life began after Justin and I were done. Since we broke up, three weeks ago, I didn’t see him at school anymore. I almost bumped into him once when I was in the city with Lucie and Sophie and I had to admit, it was hard, but I quickly forgot about him. He wasn’t worth it. I had some moments where I’d feel lonely. It was the same loneliness I felt after Harry and I broke up. I guess I kind of got used to having a boy around me. I was happy with being single for a while – I was done with all the drama – but I also wanted a boy who loved me. Not someone like Justin, who turned out not to be so great. Maybe because Justin was so bad, I craved for a boy who was great and really loved me. Someone like Harry. I still had my friends of course who love me and care for me, but it was different. Tonight was one of those nights where I felt lonely, but this time it felt heavier. I just got back from a night out with the girls and we really had a great time. I met a really cute boy on the dance floor. We danced for a while and it was really great, but I just couldn’t stop thinking of Harry. I wish I could just go back to the summer. No worries, only fun and the cutest boy in the world that liked me. I wondered if Harry still thought about me. When I was dating Justin, I was with him every day and we really had fun at the moment, but there didn’t pass a day where I didn’t think of Harry. He was always on mind, whether I liked it or not. Harry was just too special and it was too hard to just forget about him. I stood up from my bed, walked over to my closet and opened one of the drawers. There it was. The polaroid with Harry. I hid it in there to forget about him, but that didn’t help. I kept looking at it and noticed my eyes were getting wet. Before I knew it, I was crying again. I missed him like hell. I can’t even put it into words. He made me feel safe. I wanted his arms wrapped around me. I wanted his soft lips kissing mine. I wanted my fingers entwined in his. I wanted his shoulder to lay on. I wanted him. I curled up in my bed and tried to calm myself down, but it didn’t work. It only got worse. This whole situation caught me by surprise, because this was the first time in weeks that I felt like this. The last time I was such a wreck was just after we had come back from the USA. I tried to think of how I made myself feel better the last time, but I just couldn’t remember it. Then I remembered I still had some XTC and antidepressants left that Justin had given me. I couldn’t think of a better solution, so I grabbed the last XTC and antidepressant pills I had. I didn’t pay attention to the amount of pills I took, but it must have been a lot because very soon I started to feel real dizzy and I noticed breathing became heavier. Quickly I lay down on my bed again and before I knew it everything went black.

Notes

Cliffhanger ! Warning: the next chapter will be a cliffhanger as well. Prepare yourselves.
I actually feel guilty I didn't write for such a long time again. I had an idea in my mind about the progress of my story, but in the beginning I didn't really know how to write it down. Luckily the words came out of my fingers really quickly yesterday and today. I wrote a lot, so my next chapter is already done as well. I really hope you liked the last two chapters. I wanted to speed up the story a little, so I decided to write the events I wanted to happen in not too much chapters. It's definitely getting thrilling now !
Love you guys,
xo Iris

@harrehspizza