-1 week later-
Tour is seriously torture without Kylie here. I never used to find it a problem before I met her but now it’s just not the same without her here. We’ve got a concert tonight but apart from that we’re not doing anything today. I got up and texted Mark asking him to train me. He agreed and I met him in the hotel gym. He’d set up a circuit for me and I did it, talking to him as I went.
“How’s Kylie recently?” He asked.
“She’s stressed out, she has to go to court to get her dad locked up and it’s stressing her out majorly. She’s having nightmares more often; she’s a mess and will be until her dad is behind bars forever.”
“I get that. She’s gonna have to face him again and that can be scary. Is she still having therapy though?”
“Yeah, she has therapy twice a week,” I nodded, running on the treadmill.
“Not coming out here any time soon then?”
“I’m thinking of just bringing her back when the court case is finished. I’m flying back for that anyway because I have to testify against him considering he shot me, and then I might just bring her back. She can have online therapy with Savannah and you can help her with her physio. Apparently she’s running now, just in short bursts.”
“Well I’d never push her too hard, I’d obviously have to speak to her physio in the UK and see where she’s at but I don’t see why it would be a problem. She doesn’t have to start working again straight away; you all know you’re not going to get rid of Amanda even when Kylie does come back out.”
“I know, I wish that wasn’t the case but I do understand it. She’s got to have a mental health check before she comes back too, Richard told me. If she’s still too fragile, he’s not going to let her start work again.”
“That seems a little bit harsh; obviously she’s going to have mental health issues after everything she’s been through.” Mark said, frowning.
“She’s got depression, I know that. Savannah told me that even with therapy; it will take a while to get better. She hates herself, has no self-esteem. She said to my mum the other day that she doesn’t understand why she’s still alive and that fucking hurts. She has everything to fight for, but she doesn’t see it that way at all. She only sees that she’s lost all of her family and friends, she doesn’t see that she’s got me and the boys and everyone else on this tour. She just doesn’t see the bigger picture. A part of me does wish that I’d met her in completely different circumstances but I think everything that has happened has made her a better person, and it’s changed me too, all of you know that,”
“I can’t say I haven’t noticed.” Mark agreed with me.
“I just don’t know what to do anymore. My house gives her bad flashbacks. She has nightmares every single night and no matter how much therapy she has they don’t go away. She doesn’t understand why I love her, when according to her I could have so much better, but I don’t see it that way. In my eyes, she’s the one, y’know,”
“I get it. It hurts you that she doesn’t see that she’s your one. She thinks you could go out and get someone else and that is true, but you wouldn’t do that. The amount you bang on about her, you don’t have time to look at another girl. You love Kylie and everyone sees that but her, and that frustrates you.”
“Exactly,” I said. I continued to talk to Mark while I worked out and then went back to my room. I stayed in there until I got the knock telling me it was time to go to the arena. I left my room and was taken down to a van. We drove to the arena and soundchecked first before allowing 5sos to do their check. I went in to Lou and she smiled at me as I walked in.
“Mood on a scale of one to ten today Haz?” She asked. She asks me this every day and it really does help.
“About a 5 to be honest,” I sat down in the chair in front of her.
“Why a five?” She questioned.
“My girlfriend isn’t here and isn’t understanding why she should live, good enough explanation?”
“Wait what? She doesn’t get why she’s living?”
“She doesn’t want to. She thinks she’s got nothing. All of her possessions are mine, the house she lives in has my name on the paperwork, her job has been taken over by someone else. Her family don’t care about her anymore. But she doesn’t see the main thing, and that’s that she’s got me.” I explained and Lou nodded.
“It can be hard; she’s relying on you for everything. She’s scared of losing you too because she’s lost everything else so she’s like, well what if he’s next? She needs you, and not just materialistically. Obviously that’s a factor, but she needs you to keep her sane. We all know that without the phone calls to you when she has nightmares, or the little texts, she wouldn’t be coping right now. If she lost you, she’d be gone. She wouldn’t want to live, because in all honesty, what has she got to live for without you? She has nothing Harry; I understand why she’s feeling how she is. All she’s got is a crappy little flat in North Acton which she hates.”
“I know that, which is why I’m thinking of letting her know how much I need her and I want to be with her for the rest of our lives. Our relationship hasn’t exactly been easy, so I know it’s not an irrational decision. I’m thinking of asking Kylie to marry me. Of course, she’s not stable enough yet, so I’d have to wait until she’s better and her mental stability is capable of taking a proposal, but I really am serious about her.”
“Anything you need, I’m here, you know I’m a sucker for romance,” Lou smiled at me through the mirror.
Final chapter is next! What do you think is gonna happen in the court case?
Feel free to leave suggestions for oneshots about Harry and Kylie for me to do after finishing 'My Saviour'.
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