Login with:

Facebook

Twitter

Tumblr

Google

Yahoo

Aol.

Mibba

Your info will not be visible on the site. After logging in for the first time you'll be able to choose your display name.

Listening to Niall

You and I

I was in the lunchroom on my laptop facebooking Louis When Liam came sliding into the seat across me.
"Listen mate, this really can't go on any longer" He closed the screen so I would look at him.
"You had to hear her voice when I asked her about her meet with that company she was never so cold to me" I lean my chin into my palm feeling sorry for myself. I knew it was my fault. I should have never broken up with her in the first place. I was having a shitty time here and I missed her, and I didn't want to give up and go home, knowing I would never live it down. All I wanted was for Jamie to come here and make it better as I knew she would, but she didn't come- she couldn't with all of the things that were going on back at college. I should have known better, but instead of understanding I broke up with her. What a twit move.
"Hi Niall" Sasha sat down next to Liam touching his shoulder as she sat. These two were hooking up ever since we got here.
"Hey" I mumbled to her.
"He's having one of his moment" Liam rolled his eyes.
"Jamie moment?" She said with a thick accent.
"I fucked up, I really have" I shake my head. Louis said that Jamie and Harry were spending much time together, though Eleanor said I shouldn't worry about that since Jamie still cries at night about the break up. But that just made me feel so much worse, knowing I caused her so much pain.
"Niall, you know what I think? You need to go back. You don't like it here, you are miserable, and you miss your girlfriend.. you need to go back home" Sasha tells me.
"She isn't my girlfriend- we broke up and she hates me now" I drop my forehead into my hands squeezing my eyes shut.
"Come off it NI, you know that the minute she sees your face she'll go back to you- being the twat that you are" Liam winked.
"You know it's her birthday coming up in two weeks" I suddenly remember.
"April 9th.. I know Perrie said something the other day when I was Skyping Zayn… wanted to make sure you knew"
"Of course I know- I would never forget- Eleanor would kill me" the side of my mouth twitch at that.
"If it's Jamie's birthday why would Eleanor be upset if you forget it?" Sasha was confused
"Because, Jamie wouldn't really care, probably not remembering herself it was her birthday.. but her and Eleanor are best friends since forever so she keeps an eye out for Jay" I explain.
"It sounds like you have a good group of friends over there" She smiles
"Yes.. we do" I glance at Liam who was watching me.

Later that day I am in my room spread out on my bed. Louis said they want to throw a surprise party for Jamie. He said Eleanor is getting a bunch of friends together for it, wanting to make it big since she was so unhappy lately.
Other than that nothing much is going on over there. Same old, same old…
I take out my phone and dial Jay.

"You can't keep calling me"
This is the first thing she says when she answers the phone. No hello, how are you. My heart that was beating rapidly just stopped from the jolt of pain her words caused.
"Jamie please listen to me all right?" I try to sound natural but I know I am pleading.
She doesn't answer and the line is quiet.
"Are you still there?" I ask
"I am Ni, I'm listening so go on" I hear her sigh.
"I'm a dick. I messed up. I miss you and I love you and I can't believe I hurt you the way that I did, and I can't sleep or eat or do anything since I am constantly thinking about what I have done, and I am truly sorry Jamie- really" I take a deep breath.
"Please say something" I beg her when she keeps quiet.
"Niall you don't get to do this to me. You don't get to break my heart and then out of the blue call and ask about a meeting which I have no idea how you know of in the first place, and then call me now saying these things- it's not fair" Her voice breaks on the last word and even though I know she is hurting my heart fills with hope, maybe there is still hope for us.
"Eleanor told me about it, she wanted to know if I was the one who contacted the company" I say.
"Were you?" She asks, I am not sure but I think she is crying.
"I wish I was" I answer her honestly.
"You know" She starts after a long pause, "When you left it was like you took my heart with you. I looked for you everywhere I went, hoping for your face, and your smile.. I didn't feel like smiling, I mean don't get me wrong as much as I wished you would have stayed, I was happy for you that you were going, since you really wanted to and I would never take that away from you.. But I was lost, I didn't know how to be Jamie without Niall, and that has nothing to do with us being together, since we were best friends a long time before we became a couple, but slowly I learned to deal with it, and get a life, and live without my heart that was still with you.. and then when you called me that night you just broke it- just like that, and even though my heart was with you- it hurt. It hurt so much and I know I sound cheesy and cliché but it's the truth- I am being real with you. So after promising me we'll be together forever and then getting in a fight with me because I couldn't just leave everything and come to Russia, and breaking up with me- you can't just call and expect everything to be all right, I'll be damned if I'll tell you I wasn't waiting for your calls, because I did every night. It was the highlight of my day. But not anymore, I refuse to go through that again" She was crying. Her voice was thick from tears, and I had to wipe my own and take a deep breath before speaking up.
"Jamie- I never meant to hurt you- I promise! It just became so hard, being away from you and the lot, and I couldn't do it, I couldn't cope with it" I reply.
"But that's the thing Niall that you still don't understand. You just quit on me- on us. When things get hard you don't just run away- you deal with it. You try your best to make it work. I know I did! We went through much harder things than this. You gave up on me" She whispered the end and that whisper stabbed me right in the heart.
"Jay.. you believe me when I tell you I love you?" I asked. I had to make sure she knows I still love her, I felt as if my life depended on it.
"I think I know that" She said her voice shaking.
"I promise I'll make it up to you" I pledge.
"I don't want you to make it up to me. I don't want your pity. So I'm hurting, and I'll get over it.. I had once before and I will again.. I thought I will die without you but somehow I survived! I am still living… So do me a favor- instead of finding ways to make it up to me, find a way to mend your own heart.. I know you're hurting too.. and I'm sorry for your pain.. I need to go.. take care" I heard her breathe on the other side of the line for a moment longer and then it gets cut, and she is gone.
With all I have done and all of her hurt she still found in her heart enough room to hurt for me too, hoping I'll mend. I don't think there is a girl out there that ever said such a thing to a guy before. This making it even harder to let her go.
I pull up my laptop and open up my email. I still had a lot to tell her and maybe this is the best way to let her know.

'My dear Jay,
I just hung up the phone from the most heart breaking conversation I have ever had with you.
I hate it here. I hate what I have done to you and I hate myself. I want to come back home. Back to us.
I hate knowing that I left you behind and that we have come to this. And yes, I know I am repeating myself but I feel if I don't put it into writing for you to keep reading over and over again reminding you how much I love you and how much I am sorry it will never be right.
We have been through worse and that is why I am sure we will come out of this stronger. Please wait for me! I know I shouldn't ask you such a thing but I am- please wait. I will come back.
I am working hard to make it right but for that I need your help.
I love you!
Always and forever!

Before I can get a chance to press send Liam walks into our room.
"What are you up to?" He slumped down on the bed beside me peering over me to have a look at the screen. I push it down and move it to the side.
"SO I just got off the phone with Jamie… She put me in my place" I confided in him.
"She is so poised and all but when she really needs to she has no problem laying in if it's necessary" Liam smiled leaning back on the bed.
"No she has no problem, she kicked my arse left right and center" I smile lightly. This wasn't at all funny, but just thinking of her face when she gets into that mood of setting things right and putting people in their place.. God I miss her.
"Are you going back then?" Liam asked me.
"I don't know if I should.." I sigh leaning back too, looking up at the ceiling.
"Why not? She'll see your face and that's that she'll be hooked again" He clapped his hands once, repeating what he said earlier.
"Get off it, you know very well things like that don't work on Jay" I shove him
"She is not like most girls ha?" Liam says quietly.
"No.. She's not"
With that Liam gets up from my bed, going to get ready for sleep. I turn onto my stomach and pick the screen of my laptop up again. I reread the email I wrote Jamie. Once I am done I press delete and shut it down.

Notes

Can I just say I have never thought my story would ever be read- and now it reached the popular pages?? it's on page 8 but still!!!! I am soooo excited!!

Now, back to the story..
Little twist there I gave you.. giving you Niall's POV..
What did you think of it??
Do you think he should go back home? or maybe give Jamie some space?

Anyway... also I wanted to let you know this story is coming to an end. it will have like one more or two chapters to go and that is it..
SO just putting it out there so it won't catch you by surprise..

Who ever hasn't rated this please do!! maybe I can move this up on the popular pages??
Hope you are having a wonderful weekend x

Comments

I LOVED THE ENDING.... but haz is still alone... oh well

Yassss they kissed! :) i cant stop smiling!

I an so happy

I think her and hazza should be together

They have to get back together :'(((

I just got my friend hooked and so she can tell me :D
But they really have to stay together if they don't I will cry and never stop