"I know I should let you go. But I don't want to. I should have fought harder . . . longer. I just want to talk. Call me the minute you change your mind. If you don't, I won't bother you again."

Liam's words echoed in Piper's head for the rest of the evening. He had taken off with his friend. They didn't even stay for their meals, yet they paid for it anyway leaving a generous tip. Partly relieved, Piper still couldn't shake off the feel of Liam's arms around her.

Stopping by Jake's apartment after work, to avoid the temptation of calling Liam, she didn't bother telling him about her visitor. Both Jake and her believed that the band had flown off somewhere, out of their lives for good. But while she sat with Jake's arm around her, watching TV, her mind drifted back to the feel of Liam's mouth talking against her ear.

Even if they did talk, it wasn't like anything would happen between them. Maybe they could have an amiable conversation and talk about their new relationships. It was a gradual way of starting the heating process as opposed to starving the idea of losing him forever.

It was one in the morning, even though Piper purposely waited for it to get late, in the back of her mind she still saw a chance of seeing Liam; knowing he would be hours away from falling asleep. She kissed Jake's cheek and said she was heading back to her place. He offered her a ride but she kindly turned it down.

Walking down the lit busy streets, comforted by the feel of her mace spray in her purse, just in case, she loosened the hair-tie allowing her layered wavy hair to fall. Passing by an after-hours lounge bar, reading its operating hours till 3am, she thought it would be the perfect spot.

Quickly taking out her phone, following her impulse to text Liam the address before her conscience spoke too loud, she concluded the text with "I'll be at this address if you still want to talk."

Boldly walking in and taking a seat at one of their dim booths, the place reeked of sketchy behavior. Thankfully, due to the weekday, there was nothing strange going on just yet. She ordered her medicinal glass of wine, thinking through what actions to take if things should spiral elsewhere. Admiring the background music, it seemed fitting for good conversation.

Halfway through her glass and about 20 minutes later, Liam finally walked in. No disguise, just him. His deep stare locked on hers as he pressed his lips together in poor efforts to smile. It was like a knife had stabbed her in between the chest, puncturing a lung. She quickly tryied to regulate her breathing before he sat down with her.

Liam would't take his eyes off her, he barely blinked. Hands rubbed on his thighs, wiping off the sweat, once he sat down. Unsure of what to say first, not understanding why this was so hard. After all, he told her he wanted to talk, and now that she was there he still couldn't believe he received the text.

"I'm glad you text me," he half smiled.

Thinking it immature to keep her guard up, she gave him a sweet smile.

"We are friends after all right?"

A sigh of relief escaped his mouth as he was now able to return a genuine smile. A waitress approached their table asking them if they wanted anything. To Piper's surprise, Liam ordered a shot. For her same medicinal purposes perhaps?

"I thought you didn't drink?" she asked amused.

"Well a lot has changed since. I've grown up a little," he said while scratching the stubble on his chin.

"I see that," she smiled, focusing in on the red waves caused by the stirring of her wine glass.

"Please tell me. How have you been?" he begged with his big brown eyes.

"I'm doing alright. I've almost reached my goal in savings. My dad gave me some generous Christmas and birthday cards."

"Thats great! Are you planning on leaving soon?"

"I could pick up and go now if I wanted to. But I've grown so attached to the restaurant, my coworkers and friends . . ."

"And Jake?"

Piper's eyes widened at the mention of his name. Jake wasn't a threat to her plans, he was more like her comfort pillow, he took away the ache of feeling lonely. But she hadn't admitted that to him, and she certainly wouldn't admit it to Liam. She felt too ashamed.

Not receiving an answer, Liam left it alone. Just in time the shot glass came and without hesitation Liam gulped it down; caught off guard by Piper's stunned expression.

"I've become rather fond of these little guys," he stated while signaling the waitress for another one.

"Hmm . . . so how are things going with you?"

"Oh you know, the usual. Busy as hell, my life being ran for me . . . still," he smirked.

"When did you get back together with your ex?" Piper asked casually while taking another sip of wine.

"Its been 5 months, I think. We are used to each other."

Piper thought that maybe the reasons he was back with his ex were for the same ones she was with Jake . . . security in not feeling alone.

The next shot came, and after that Liam seemed more at ease. A softness filling his eyes as he made himself more comfortable in the booth.

"I'll have some water now, please. Oh, would you happen to have any tea?"
The waitress nodded and walked away.

Piper grinned at his request. Clearly some things hadn't changed all that much. Her bottom lip caught in between her teeth as she searched for what questions to ask and which to avoid. Then she became short winded at the sight of Liam's penetrating dark eyes studying her.

He noticed her fiddling with the stem of her wind glass, wondering if she felt nervous, because that would've meant that she still cared. Wanting desperately to grab her hand as he remembered their softness, his thoughts were interrupted by the server's return.

"I'm so sorry sir, but it appears we are out of the tea packets as we don't buy those very often. Can I get you anything else? Another courtesy shot?" she negotiated.

Pausing in thought he then replied "No, that's fine. Thank you," he smiled timidly. The air grew quiet until he stirred it by concluding, "See that is why, till this day, you will always be my favorite server."

Piper blushed, endeared by his comment. The mood was relaxed and with that came more questions and easier flow of conversation. So much so, they even began to laugh sparingly, both pausing to admire one another.

Reading the hour on her phone, her mind screamed FLEE but her heart whispered STAY. Guilt encompassed her attraction towards an older Liam. As his words rambled on about another tour experience, she observed his physical change. Other than his facial hair and sophisticated hairstyle, his shoulders look broader, filling out his shirt more.

Her imagination ran while listening and nodding to his stories. He still had that same charming-boyish grin and laugh. The way his eyes squinted the greater his smile got. She missed him, and as much as she wanted him to know it, she couldn't tell him.

"Till when are you staying?"

"It depends if we follow through on a video we were supposed to film here. But by the looks of it I don't think that's going to happen."

"Will you stop by to say goodbye?" she asked humbly.

"Of course," he smiled.

"Good. Well I should be getting back. It's really late," Piper stood up.

"Please let me walk you back."

Nodding, they both left a tip for the waitress and walked out to the quiet night. There were less cars and people to be found, but not quite dead. They nervously walked down the street in direction towards her apartment building. Small random chit chat occupied the awkward silence. Piper feared he would ask to come up, because surely she wouldn't be strong enough to say no.

Liam on the other hand, faced with the same struggles as before, not wanting to part. But it was extremely late and they were both taken. It wasn't long before they reached her building, the steps growing slower and shorter.

"May I walk you to your door? I promise I won't go any further," he agreed.

It almost felt like a permanent goodbye. And with that fearful thought, Piper gave in. Not trusting or knowing what would happen beyond the entrance, Liam remained at a safe distance, staring at the floor. Confusing her as to why he wanted to accompany her all the way up, unless he hoped to convince her at the finish line.

Liam was battling hard between the voices in his head, choosing which one to obey. Should he linger in one final hug or try and kiss her goodbye. He wouldn't dare ask her if he could come in, but the thought of being only feet away from the bed where they made love, had his mind tormenting him with the vivid images.

They stood outside her door, she hadn't even attempted to take out her keys yet. Piper chewed on her bottom lip, feeling ants marching down her entire body. It would have been too easy and horrible of her to kiss him. That she couldn't and wouldn't do. But the curiosity of knowing if he wanted to drove her a little impatient.

"I should go. The more I stand here, the more it all comes back to me," he confessed while his eyes remained glued to the floor.

"I agree . . . I'm glad we got to chat, smooth out the rough patches."

"Yeah," Liam said softly, finally looking up at her, causing her to choke.

She saw the faint liquid begin to form in the corner of his eyes. Her eyes beginning to mimic his. He couldn't do this to her. Not now after they spent the last hour or so reconciling the gap. Leaving things on good terms.

Liam leaned in, ignoring her startled reaction to lean back.

"I just want to hug you goodbye," he eased her mind.

Letting his arms wrap around her once more, no risk of getting caught, she brushed up her arms to wrap around his waist. Her head resting on his shoulder. His musk triggered more memories as she recalled the scene where they stood by the window, before their next love session.

The scent of her hair, invigorating his nostrils with excruciating pains in his gut. Liam didn't want to let go. He buried his face in her soft locks and inhaled her deeply. Hearing her gasp quietly as her arms tightened around him. It was clear that whatever they had was still left unresolved. She still had the same effect on him.

What made her different from his ex and every other girl? Liam simply couldn't understand. He knew his ex way longer than the sporadic encounters with his favorite waitress, yet he had never experienced the passion or intensity like he did with the Piper. An unexplainable connection he worried he'd never be free from; he could live with that . . . if they were together.

Piper squeezed his shoulder, getting ready to push him away, that is until she felt him brush her hair behind her ear. Closing her eyes at the touch of his hand on her face. Refusing to open them, for she could feel his head pull away, and she didn't want to be lured in by his warm gaze. So she squeezed them tight, resisting the impulse.

Liam smiled, knowing she was trying her best to not give in; but she hadn't pushed him away either. Taking advantage of their proximity, he engraved the image of her face in his mind. A mental tattoo to keep forever. Shame began to creep up, never succumbing to the cheating type, he knew he needed to let her go.

Not before feeling one last stroke of his fingers over her cheeks. Observing her shortness of breath as her chest puffed up and caved unsteadily. Her eyes still shut as her brows began to burrow. He felt her hands press against his chest, waiting for her to push him away. To his surprise, her eyes opened instead.

She looked up at him, overwhelmed by the surface of his protruding chest underneath his shirt. Giving anything to see but a few seconds of his beautiful transformation. Weak, her eyes fell on the concave of his collarbone. Lips parted as her breathing had already grown difficult and her balance unstable. Her knees gave up from all the emotional stress. Piper was now holding on to his biceps for sustenance, but even that had grown bigger.

"I don't feel so well," she swallowed hard.

"What's wrong?" his head jerked back, observing the paleness in her face.

"I don't . . . know," she gasped for air. "I feel dizzy."

"Is it the wine?" he asked concerned.

"I don't think so. It-it wasn't more than what I usually drink."

Holding her by the waist, as he attempted to let go, she stumbled to the side. Panic replaced his momentary lust and he began rummaging through her purse for her keys. Rapidly unlocking the door, he threw her purse on the floor and swung his arms under her legs to scoop her up.

Walking towards her bed she shook her head.

"No, on the couch," Piper insisted.

Turning to lay her down gently, he felt her hands grow cold. He skipped over to grab the blanket off her bed and cover her. A mix of worry and guilt consumed him. What could have caused this? What could he do to help her?

"Piper, what do you want me to do?" he asked softly.

Confused by what had just happened. She asked for some water. Within seconds, she took a sip from the cup in Liam's hand. Convinced that she would feel better once she woke up in the morning, she knew it was time for him to leave.

"Thank you Liam. I don't know what that was about . . . but you should go."

"Are you sure?" he lamented.

"Yeah. You shouldn't be here," Piper's eyes closed, trying to keep the dizziness at bay.

Hating to leave, Liam walked over to pick up her purse and things off the floor. Looking down at her phone, not wanting to listen to that little voice, he searched for Jake's number.

I woke up sick, I don't know why. Please come by in the morning. -Piper

Liam placed the phone on the coffee table and quietly walked out. Glancing one last time at her sleeping figure. He still loved her but he couldn't have her now.

Notes

:..../


Finally an update here too! Yay! xoxo