Say Something - A Great Big World (listen to this song while reading)
Riley's POV:

"It was for the best that he be punished honey, you have to understand that." My mother pleaded. This just made a bad situation, ten times worse.

"So Seth was bailed out of jail? Which means he was sent to jail because of me, and now he's out on bail?" I choked, trying to understand what she was telling me.

"Exactly. I promise you though, he won't get anywhere near you ever again." She sighed, trying to reassure me. "Now listen, your father and I are going to be out tonight with Joni at her school, she won an award or something so we have to go. Are you going to be alright alone for a little while?" She asked.

"Yeah, I'll be alright alone." I put on a fake smile and headed up stairs towards my room.

I sat on my bed for a while, waiting for time to pass. Eventually, they came upstairs to say goodbye and my father gave me a new cell phone... not that I'll be using much of it ever.

Once they left, I contemplated life, and then I considered death. Neither one of those particularly appeal to me at the moment, but I know one of them can kill the pain inside.

Death.

I decided the best way for me to do this was to write a small note. Nothing to deep or personal, because I don't want to change my mind. Just small, short little I love you's to my parents, Joni, even Nick and Zayn.

As I feel I've finally lost it, my hands rummage through the drawers for a small container of pills. The only things on my mind are the numbness I'm craving, the pain throughout my whole body and oddly enough, Harry. I blamed him for this whole thing, when he's fucking loved me this whole time? It makes no sense to me, and it rocks me to the core.

I unscrewed the plastic top of the bottle and emptied around 15 pills into my hand.

This one is for Dixie, why couldn't you have been there for me? -- Swallow
This one is for Seth, you twisted bastard. I hope you're happy -- Swallow
This one is for my parents; I was never good enough, was I? -- Swallow
This one is for all those nasty looks I got in school, thanks a lot. -- Swallow
This one is for myself, I really fucked up this time. -- Swallow

As hot tears erupted out of my eyes and I swallowed countless pills, I reached for my phone. I could feel myself slowly shutting down, which is everything I wanted. I dialed his number, and lucky for me, he answered on the first ring.

"Riley?" his voice was nervous, almost frantic.

"I love you, Harry." I sobbed into the phone. "Please tell everyone I'm sorry, tell Zayn, tell Joni, tell my parents... even Dixie." I hiccuped, swallowing another pill.

"Riley? What's going on? Are you ok?" He begged.

"I'm sorry I blamed you... I'll tell Eric your sorry, ok? Just know I did love you Harry... I really did." I croaked before hanging up.

I settled myself down onto my bed and shut my eyes, hopefully for the last time. I deserve this, I'm a disgrace. Everyone hates me, and now I hate myself. The world would be a better place with me gone, I know it......

Harry's POV:

"Riley?" I said, shocked that she was calling me.

"I love you Harry." She cried into the phone. What? "please tell everyone I'm sorry, tell Zayn, tell Joni, tell my parents... even Dixie." she sobbed, gulping down rather hard.

"Riley? What's going on? Are you ok?" I pleaded on the opposite end of the call. For some reason, my feet were already carrying me down the stairs of my house and out the front door.

"I'm sorry I blamed you... I'll tell Eric your sorry, ok? Just know I did love you Harry. I really did." She choked into the phone. My screaming of her name was useless when the line went dead. She'll tell Eric I'm sorry? Then it hit me like a ton of bricks... suicide.

I called 911 immediately as I tried to kick down her front door, but it wouldn't budge.

"911, where is your emergency?"

"My girlfriend is trying to kill herself!" I shouted, running towards the back yard and kicking in their giant glass window. The house alarm started blaring and I gave the woman Riley's address before sprinting my way upstairs.

I barged into her bedroom to find her body settled softly on top of the mattress.

"Riley!!!!" I shrieked, coming to her side. Her eyes were sealed shut and an empty bottle of pills lay beside her relaxed fingers. "Please wake up, please! Don't do this to me, I love you!" I screamed, shaking her dying body.

My fingers grazed her neck, there was barely a pulse. I scooped her up and ran down the stairs to an awaiting ambulance.

"She took these pills I think." I shouted, tossing the bottle to the paramedic.

"Thanks kid, you might have just saved this girls life." He sighed, stepping onto the ambulance. I numbly followed his actions, and stood back while they worked on her. Her heart flatlined, and bounced back... flatlined again, then slowly bounced back.

I might have just saved her life? I'm part of the reason she did this to herself. It's all on me.

Innocent Riley might die, and I'm to blame. How can I live with that? The answer is that I can't.

Notes

how do we feel after this chapter? x
What would you like to see happen next?

comment / vote / subscribe ...