It Takes Patience II: Guarded
Chapter 5: Beneficial
*Harry’s POV*
I was up at seven this morning dressed and ready to go when the nurse brought me my discharge papers. I signed them and when my mum pulled up I walked out and got into the car. She hugged me and kissed me lingering on my cheek for too long. I’m not in an affectionate mood, but I know why she’s acting like this. It’s my fault but it’s still annoying.
“Okay mum! Okay, that’s enough!” Her eyes flashed with hurt, and she blinked quickly before going back to her side of the car.
“Harry, I’ll kiss you if I like! I almost lost you and you’re my baby boy.”
“I’m nineteen.”
“Still my youngest, still my baby. As a matter of fact give me a kiss as well.” I rolled my eyes and gave her a small peck on the cheek causing a smile to cross her lips. I turned my head to try to keep from catching her infectious grin because I’m still annoyed, but I can feel my lips tug in a smirk for a few brief seconds before I force it away.
“Can we leave now please? Or are you gonna force me to do something else that I don't want to do while we sit here for another hour?” Her smile is gone.
Way to go H.
She puts her hands on the steering wheel and puts the car in drive when I notice it. The sunlight reflects off of the engagement ring on her finger that wasn’t there before and shines in my eye. I have to bite my tongue and turn my head to look out the window to calm my nerves. Why does she have to push my limits so early in the morning?
“We’re going to finish helping Gemma unpack her things in today and then I’ll take you to session.”
“We’re?”
“Yes, you’re going to help.”
“Just drop me off home first I need to shower anyway. I’ll meet you there. And I don’t need you to take me to session. I have a car, I can drive myself!” I’m curt with her and I stare blankly out the window watching cars as they passed. Anything, but looking at the symbol of impending doom that fits smugly on her ring finger.
“Mm, I think its best that I take you.” The fuck it is. I love my mum. I do, but she will not follow me everywhere every time she has the chance.
“I can go by myself to session and meet you at Gems flat alone. I won’t try and drive myself off the road on the way. I promise.”
I grin slightly at my sadistic joke trying to make light of a fucked up circumstance and I see her eyes glaze over. Even if she was thinking of dropping me off home first and letting me meeti her at my sister’s house, that thought is long gone now.
“I’m just joking mum. Don’t start crying.”
“Don’t joke like that anymore Harry!” She turns the wheel of the car causing the diamond to reflect into my eyes again and turn my head to look out the window clenching my jaw. Anger starts to stir and I realize I need my meds to put them under some type of control. My meds or her, she’s the only one I’ve talked to about my concerns with my mum’s wedding and after I would tell her about it, I my anxieties would somewhat settle.
When I take out my phone, I have ten new messages all from her and I delete them all except for one particular voice mail. She sounds as broken as I feel in it, but then again she can’t feel that bad. She obviously didn’t feel bad when she was fucking someone else. I’ve never felt this way before and it may be my ego, but I don’t think anyone has. It confuses me, I love her and I hate her at the same time.
When we pull up to Gemma’s place, there is a red Audi parked in the front drive. Since Gemma doesn’t have a car yet, there’s only one person that this can belong to.
Gemma runs outside and pulls me into another hug that I have to return in spite of myself and when I look up I can see her standing in the door way looking at me with a mischievous grin I know all too well on her face. Tamsin. There are a lot of things about Tamsin that I know all too well.
“Hi Harry.”
“Hi.” As we all headed back into the house to help Gemma unpack, I brush up against her on accident, but she smiles like I’m trying to send her a signal on purpose.
Tamsin is the last thing on my mind right now, but she’s so conceited she probably thinks that I came here because she would be here. Her and my sister have been close friends for a long time and I for the life of me can’t understand why. They’re complete opposites.
My mom starts to help Gemma unpack boxes in the kitchen as I roam around the house to get a better look at my sister’s new home. I stop in the second bedroom when I hear footsteps behind me.
“How are you doing? I heard about you and your girlfriend...” She trails off and when I turn around my green eyes are met with those of a clear blue sky. Tamsin’s fit, but I’m not interested...there’s someone else I need.
“I’m fine. Rather not talk about it.”
“Are you really fine? Generally someone who’s fine about a split doesn’t try to take their own life.”
“I wasn’t trying to! It’s none of your business Tamsin! Stay the fuck out of it!” I try to walk past her but she blocks my way.
“You’re angry and hurt I get that. You deserve to be angry. I would be angry too if my girlfriend cheated then high tailed it out of the country." Wait, what does she she's mean gone, she still has a day left in London.
“What do you mean she's gone?”
“You didn’t know?.. According to your friends and Gems, she left early.” I could feel a mix of emotions try to take over me, but I take control again the way I used to at Maudsely and swallow them down. She left me... she really left me.
I get you Harry, and maybe I can help...” She looks over her shoulder and lowers her voice to make sure we’re alone and that she’s not heard.
“Remember the way we used to help each other out?” She takes a step towards me and rests her hands on my waist and I remove them from me quickly. She’s got to be joking. I mean we did used to have a sordid history, but it’s just that and it’s in the past for a reason.
“No thanks.” She chuckles at the look I give her and takes a step back with a sly look on her face.
“The offer still stands. You can take your anger and frustrations out on me; I’ll gladly take it from you any day.” She smiles and winks before heading back to the kitchen with my mum and sister and I’m more ready to go home now than I was earlier.
*Reagan’s POV*
When I explained to my mother that I had to be in San Francisco by five today, she was too eager to help me finish packing the necessary things I needed. Apparently this apartment would be fully furnished like the one I had in London so all I really needed to bring was myself and more clothes. I left my luggage from London packed and put a few more things into some boxes while my mom asked me some intrusive and downright embarrassing questions about my first time with Harry. I thought the torture was over but it’s continued on the car ride the next morning.
“Well sweetie I just think that you should go on birth control. You never know who you’ll meet in San Fran, and when that moment comes and it gets heated-”
“Mom please! I’m still with Harry. I won’t be having any heated moments with anyone else. I don’t want to have this discussion anymore. Can we please change the subject?”
I won’t. I can’t have sex with anyone else. It was a mistake with Peyton and not memorable enough to leave an impression. Every time Harry and I...connected, it was earth shaking. He’s the only person I ever wanted to be intimate with and that still stands. I know that he’s upset with me right now, but we'll be fine. We will. He wouldn’t have sex with anyone else either...would he?
We pull up to the apartment complex around ten o’clock since we left at five this morning and when I get in, I immediately don’t like it as much as the one in London. It’s bigger than the one there and albeit a little nicer but it’s not the same feel. There felt like home, this one feels cold.
I move in the small amount of things I had packed and head down with my mom to the car that was their waiting for me, in the complex garage. When I find the all black BMW, I can’t help the smile that crosses my face. I guess I could get used to the cold apartment if I get to drive this everyday.
My mom sticks around for a few more hours before she leaves around three. Even though she got on my nerves, I thank her for all of her help and she starts to cry like she did when I left for London.
I head back in the house to prepare myself for my new job and after my shower, I don't know what to wear. It makes me think about when Laurie would help me decide on an outfit before a date or a night out and I realize how much I miss my friend. I call her, but I get no answer. After what seems like hours trying to find the appropriate thing to wear, I settle on my charcoal grey dress pants and my white dress shirt and put my hair into a pony tail. I glance into the mirror one last time before I leave and I’m not really sure who’s looking back at me. Shaking off the lost feeling that tries to overwhelm me, I go back down to the beautiful BMW in the garage, and tyrpe the address to Dr. Koch's office in my GPS system.
When I get there, I park my car in the space that has my name on it (definitely can get used to this) and I walk inside. There is no one at the front desk so I timidly make my way down a hall and stop when I see a man behind a cherry wood desk on the phone.
“Yes, she just walked in as a matter of fact..” He waved me into his office and gestured for me to sit down in front of him. “Of course, we will when we get there...Yes see you in five weeks’ time Elizabeth.”
Elizabeth? He’s talking to Dr. Baker and my brain begins to race with questions that I want to ask him to ask her, all of them about Harry of course.
Dr. Koch looked at me when he got off the phone as if he was sizing me up, and we sat in uncomfortable silence for two minutes before he spoke.
“I’m glad you weren’t late, early in fact. I won’t tolerate tardiness or excuses. You will be here on time everyday eight o’ clock sharp, or you’ll be fired. You will follow the rules as I give them or you will be fired. You will follow me and watch what I do closely as if you were a shadow. I understand you sat in on sessions back in London with Dr. Baker and you will do the same here, except here you’ll be shadowing me instead of a patient. Hopefully that will give you less room for error. You and I both know that you don’t have any more room for mistakes.”
He spoke quickly and the not so subtle hints that he dropped made me aware that he knew about my relationship with Harry. I opened my mouth to speak but he cut me off.
“I’m not finished, you can comment and ask questions when I’m done. Do you know that sexual affairs with patients could go on your record in this business before you even begin?”
I didn’t know what to say. I sat there dazed and I felt myself become anxious under his unwavering glare.
“That wasn’t a rhetorical question Miss Stoger and I’m expecting an answer.”
“Yes, I mean no I didn’t but I do now.” But I don’t regret my ‘affair’ one bit, in fact I plan on rekindling it soon.
“You could have put Elizabeth in a very bad spot and I won’t have it here at my practice. I will watch you like a hawk. Any more major errors like the one you made and I’ll be sure myself that it goes on your record. From what I hear you’re a very smart girl. We wouldn’t want you to be black listed as a therapist before you even begin. Are we clear?”
“Yes.”
“Good. With that being said” he took out some papers and then handed them to me. “sign your name at the bottom and then I’ll give you a tour of the premises. It’s nowhere near as massive as Maudsley so I expect for you to pick up quickly. We’ll only be here for a few weeks, but you should still know your surroundings for the time being.”
“A few weeks?” I questioned him timidly. I’ve only just met Dr. Koch and I can already tell that he’s a hard ass and I don’t want to be caught in the line of fire. Maybe this is the reason why I needed luck from Victoria.
“Yes a few weeks, five and a half to be exact. There’s a conference in London that we will be attending and I have research studies that you will assist me with to be done there. The school has counted my work as a credit to their university so instead of attending the usual humdrum classes, you will assist me full time. This puts more on the line for you because if you mess up with me, you won’t get the credits and that will be an entire semester wasted. You will have to start all over. I know your smart. Don’t screw it up.”
We started our short tour of the Private practice offices, and throughout the entire thing I paid attention but there was a mantra playing in my head the whole time. I’m going back to London. This job will be difficult, but it’s already working to my benefit.
I was up at seven this morning dressed and ready to go when the nurse brought me my discharge papers. I signed them and when my mum pulled up I walked out and got into the car. She hugged me and kissed me lingering on my cheek for too long. I’m not in an affectionate mood, but I know why she’s acting like this. It’s my fault but it’s still annoying.
“Okay mum! Okay, that’s enough!” Her eyes flashed with hurt, and she blinked quickly before going back to her side of the car.
“Harry, I’ll kiss you if I like! I almost lost you and you’re my baby boy.”
“I’m nineteen.”
“Still my youngest, still my baby. As a matter of fact give me a kiss as well.” I rolled my eyes and gave her a small peck on the cheek causing a smile to cross her lips. I turned my head to try to keep from catching her infectious grin because I’m still annoyed, but I can feel my lips tug in a smirk for a few brief seconds before I force it away.
“Can we leave now please? Or are you gonna force me to do something else that I don't want to do while we sit here for another hour?” Her smile is gone.
Way to go H.
She puts her hands on the steering wheel and puts the car in drive when I notice it. The sunlight reflects off of the engagement ring on her finger that wasn’t there before and shines in my eye. I have to bite my tongue and turn my head to look out the window to calm my nerves. Why does she have to push my limits so early in the morning?
“We’re going to finish helping Gemma unpack her things in today and then I’ll take you to session.”
“We’re?”
“Yes, you’re going to help.”
“Just drop me off home first I need to shower anyway. I’ll meet you there. And I don’t need you to take me to session. I have a car, I can drive myself!” I’m curt with her and I stare blankly out the window watching cars as they passed. Anything, but looking at the symbol of impending doom that fits smugly on her ring finger.
“Mm, I think its best that I take you.” The fuck it is. I love my mum. I do, but she will not follow me everywhere every time she has the chance.
“I can go by myself to session and meet you at Gems flat alone. I won’t try and drive myself off the road on the way. I promise.”
I grin slightly at my sadistic joke trying to make light of a fucked up circumstance and I see her eyes glaze over. Even if she was thinking of dropping me off home first and letting me meeti her at my sister’s house, that thought is long gone now.
“I’m just joking mum. Don’t start crying.”
“Don’t joke like that anymore Harry!” She turns the wheel of the car causing the diamond to reflect into my eyes again and turn my head to look out the window clenching my jaw. Anger starts to stir and I realize I need my meds to put them under some type of control. My meds or her, she’s the only one I’ve talked to about my concerns with my mum’s wedding and after I would tell her about it, I my anxieties would somewhat settle.
When I take out my phone, I have ten new messages all from her and I delete them all except for one particular voice mail. She sounds as broken as I feel in it, but then again she can’t feel that bad. She obviously didn’t feel bad when she was fucking someone else. I’ve never felt this way before and it may be my ego, but I don’t think anyone has. It confuses me, I love her and I hate her at the same time.
When we pull up to Gemma’s place, there is a red Audi parked in the front drive. Since Gemma doesn’t have a car yet, there’s only one person that this can belong to.
Gemma runs outside and pulls me into another hug that I have to return in spite of myself and when I look up I can see her standing in the door way looking at me with a mischievous grin I know all too well on her face. Tamsin. There are a lot of things about Tamsin that I know all too well.
“Hi Harry.”
“Hi.” As we all headed back into the house to help Gemma unpack, I brush up against her on accident, but she smiles like I’m trying to send her a signal on purpose.
Tamsin is the last thing on my mind right now, but she’s so conceited she probably thinks that I came here because she would be here. Her and my sister have been close friends for a long time and I for the life of me can’t understand why. They’re complete opposites.
My mom starts to help Gemma unpack boxes in the kitchen as I roam around the house to get a better look at my sister’s new home. I stop in the second bedroom when I hear footsteps behind me.
“How are you doing? I heard about you and your girlfriend...” She trails off and when I turn around my green eyes are met with those of a clear blue sky. Tamsin’s fit, but I’m not interested...there’s someone else I need.
“I’m fine. Rather not talk about it.”
“Are you really fine? Generally someone who’s fine about a split doesn’t try to take their own life.”
“I wasn’t trying to! It’s none of your business Tamsin! Stay the fuck out of it!” I try to walk past her but she blocks my way.
“You’re angry and hurt I get that. You deserve to be angry. I would be angry too if my girlfriend cheated then high tailed it out of the country." Wait, what does she she's mean gone, she still has a day left in London.
“What do you mean she's gone?”
“You didn’t know?.. According to your friends and Gems, she left early.” I could feel a mix of emotions try to take over me, but I take control again the way I used to at Maudsely and swallow them down. She left me... she really left me.
I get you Harry, and maybe I can help...” She looks over her shoulder and lowers her voice to make sure we’re alone and that she’s not heard.
“Remember the way we used to help each other out?” She takes a step towards me and rests her hands on my waist and I remove them from me quickly. She’s got to be joking. I mean we did used to have a sordid history, but it’s just that and it’s in the past for a reason.
“No thanks.” She chuckles at the look I give her and takes a step back with a sly look on her face.
“The offer still stands. You can take your anger and frustrations out on me; I’ll gladly take it from you any day.” She smiles and winks before heading back to the kitchen with my mum and sister and I’m more ready to go home now than I was earlier.
*Reagan’s POV*
When I explained to my mother that I had to be in San Francisco by five today, she was too eager to help me finish packing the necessary things I needed. Apparently this apartment would be fully furnished like the one I had in London so all I really needed to bring was myself and more clothes. I left my luggage from London packed and put a few more things into some boxes while my mom asked me some intrusive and downright embarrassing questions about my first time with Harry. I thought the torture was over but it’s continued on the car ride the next morning.
“Well sweetie I just think that you should go on birth control. You never know who you’ll meet in San Fran, and when that moment comes and it gets heated-”
“Mom please! I’m still with Harry. I won’t be having any heated moments with anyone else. I don’t want to have this discussion anymore. Can we please change the subject?”
I won’t. I can’t have sex with anyone else. It was a mistake with Peyton and not memorable enough to leave an impression. Every time Harry and I...connected, it was earth shaking. He’s the only person I ever wanted to be intimate with and that still stands. I know that he’s upset with me right now, but we'll be fine. We will. He wouldn’t have sex with anyone else either...would he?
We pull up to the apartment complex around ten o’clock since we left at five this morning and when I get in, I immediately don’t like it as much as the one in London. It’s bigger than the one there and albeit a little nicer but it’s not the same feel. There felt like home, this one feels cold.
I move in the small amount of things I had packed and head down with my mom to the car that was their waiting for me, in the complex garage. When I find the all black BMW, I can’t help the smile that crosses my face. I guess I could get used to the cold apartment if I get to drive this everyday.
My mom sticks around for a few more hours before she leaves around three. Even though she got on my nerves, I thank her for all of her help and she starts to cry like she did when I left for London.
I head back in the house to prepare myself for my new job and after my shower, I don't know what to wear. It makes me think about when Laurie would help me decide on an outfit before a date or a night out and I realize how much I miss my friend. I call her, but I get no answer. After what seems like hours trying to find the appropriate thing to wear, I settle on my charcoal grey dress pants and my white dress shirt and put my hair into a pony tail. I glance into the mirror one last time before I leave and I’m not really sure who’s looking back at me. Shaking off the lost feeling that tries to overwhelm me, I go back down to the beautiful BMW in the garage, and tyrpe the address to Dr. Koch's office in my GPS system.
When I get there, I park my car in the space that has my name on it (definitely can get used to this) and I walk inside. There is no one at the front desk so I timidly make my way down a hall and stop when I see a man behind a cherry wood desk on the phone.
“Yes, she just walked in as a matter of fact..” He waved me into his office and gestured for me to sit down in front of him. “Of course, we will when we get there...Yes see you in five weeks’ time Elizabeth.”
Elizabeth? He’s talking to Dr. Baker and my brain begins to race with questions that I want to ask him to ask her, all of them about Harry of course.
Dr. Koch looked at me when he got off the phone as if he was sizing me up, and we sat in uncomfortable silence for two minutes before he spoke.
“I’m glad you weren’t late, early in fact. I won’t tolerate tardiness or excuses. You will be here on time everyday eight o’ clock sharp, or you’ll be fired. You will follow the rules as I give them or you will be fired. You will follow me and watch what I do closely as if you were a shadow. I understand you sat in on sessions back in London with Dr. Baker and you will do the same here, except here you’ll be shadowing me instead of a patient. Hopefully that will give you less room for error. You and I both know that you don’t have any more room for mistakes.”
He spoke quickly and the not so subtle hints that he dropped made me aware that he knew about my relationship with Harry. I opened my mouth to speak but he cut me off.
“I’m not finished, you can comment and ask questions when I’m done. Do you know that sexual affairs with patients could go on your record in this business before you even begin?”
I didn’t know what to say. I sat there dazed and I felt myself become anxious under his unwavering glare.
“That wasn’t a rhetorical question Miss Stoger and I’m expecting an answer.”
“Yes, I mean no I didn’t but I do now.” But I don’t regret my ‘affair’ one bit, in fact I plan on rekindling it soon.
“You could have put Elizabeth in a very bad spot and I won’t have it here at my practice. I will watch you like a hawk. Any more major errors like the one you made and I’ll be sure myself that it goes on your record. From what I hear you’re a very smart girl. We wouldn’t want you to be black listed as a therapist before you even begin. Are we clear?”
“Yes.”
“Good. With that being said” he took out some papers and then handed them to me. “sign your name at the bottom and then I’ll give you a tour of the premises. It’s nowhere near as massive as Maudsley so I expect for you to pick up quickly. We’ll only be here for a few weeks, but you should still know your surroundings for the time being.”
“A few weeks?” I questioned him timidly. I’ve only just met Dr. Koch and I can already tell that he’s a hard ass and I don’t want to be caught in the line of fire. Maybe this is the reason why I needed luck from Victoria.
“Yes a few weeks, five and a half to be exact. There’s a conference in London that we will be attending and I have research studies that you will assist me with to be done there. The school has counted my work as a credit to their university so instead of attending the usual humdrum classes, you will assist me full time. This puts more on the line for you because if you mess up with me, you won’t get the credits and that will be an entire semester wasted. You will have to start all over. I know your smart. Don’t screw it up.”
We started our short tour of the Private practice offices, and throughout the entire thing I paid attention but there was a mantra playing in my head the whole time. I’m going back to London. This job will be difficult, but it’s already working to my benefit.
haha mine too they always try to put an extra "a" in it
4/1/14