She's got your hair
She's got your eyes
She's got your exact same horoscope sign
She may be pretty
She's something new
But that means nothing
She ain't you
~She Ain't You, New Hollow

Harry

Harry’s head lolls to the side, hitting a hard, tiled surface he wakes up with a jolt, and rubs his palms over his face leaving flecks of dried blood everywhere. Weakly, he manages to pull himself out of the bathtub, he hastily pulls the dirty shirt off and trips forward almost falling over his own face. He grabs the wash basin for support and takes a deep breath, looking at his face in the mirror.

Dark bags surround his eyes, behind his hollowed out cheeks, his green eyes have lost the warmth and love they held, replaced with an emotionless, odd green colour. His hair falls just past his shoulders, tangled unruly. His, once tanned skin, is now a pasty white.

Harry reaches across to turn the tap, he brings his hands under the cool water and splashes it over his face, droplets of water roll down from his face, past his neck and, down his frail body. Harry rubs his face, and his wrists until the blood stops flowing. Gently he uses his hand and leaves the support of the counter, reaching over to pull the door open. He steps out of the bathroom wiping his face with a towel, he unzips his pants, jumping when an awkward cough pulls interrupts him.

He abruptly turn around, his vision turning blurry for a moment, he shakes his head once and slowly opens his eyes, “Kenn--”

“Kendall. Yeah. Uh, I just,” the girl reaches for her pocket and pulls out a brown wallet, “You dropped this in my car that day. Uh yeah.” Kendall mumbles pushing the wallet in Harry’s hands. Harry grabs it quickly, so that Kendall doesn’t see the scars that dance across the skin of his wrist.

He turns around, rummaging through his closet for a long sleeved shirt, he hears the click of a door. Guilt, for what he had done consumes him. “Uh Ken--,” he racks his brain for the name she had just told. Fuck. He was losing his mind.

“--Dall. Kendall,” she whispers softly.

“Yeah, right. Sorry. I’m not thinking straight. Kendall, thank you.” He says pulling the shirt over his head. Kendall smiles softly, it would be an exact replica of Lexi’s if a dimple formed on her left cheek, and if her eyes crinkled at the edges.

“Yeah, it’s okay. i was in town for a modelling thing, so yeah. Anyway, I should go,” she says pointing to the door.

“You could stay for lunch, if you’d like,” Harry offers scratching the back of his neck. He wants her to say no, but another part of him wants her to stay, she looks so much like Lexi, that he can almost pretend that its her. Kendall bites her lip contemplating whether to stay or not. Harry turns to face the window, as his heart lurches painfully in his chest seeing that small action. “So, uh?” he asks quietly.

“Okay.” She says finally. Harry tries to smile at her, his lips twitch but his lips don’t lift up into that stunning lopsided smile that used to grace his face with one look at Lexi. He walks past her, leaving the door behind him open, Kendall trails behind him as he reaches the kitchen.

“Is pasta okay with you? I haven’t done grocery shopping in a while so there isn’t a lot of variety.”

“Pasta should be fine.” Kendall replies, “do you, uh, need help?”

Harry shakes his head, not only in attempts to say that he’ll be fine but also because memories of Lexi and Harry horribly trying to make pasta resurface, in the exact same kitchen. He takes a deep breath, clutching the edge of the smooth countertop, until his knuckles turn white.

“Are you okay?”

“M’alright,” Harry says, struggling to breathe. He forcefully pushes air out his lungs and stands up reaching behind him for the fridge’s handle. “Just alright.”

“So, you’re a model?” Harry asks stirring the pasta in the pan. Kendall nods, “that’s, uh, interesting.” Harry remembers the time when Lexi was getting these modelling contracts and she had hated it. Something about displaying her body for the world to see. Harry had found it amusing how riled up she got about it, her face would turn different shades of red. Her nose wrinkled up in the most adorable of ways, she would place her hands on her hips, and looked absolutely adorable and stunningly sexy at the same time.

“You zone out a lot,” Kendall commented lightly. Harry snapped out of his trance.

“Yeah. I...sorry. You were saying?”

“You’ve got a nice place,” she says looking around. Her eyes lingering on the large photo frame that hangs above the TV. Five boys and four girls. They look young, carefree. Especially Harry, he looks...happy, and in love, his eyes resting on a stunning brunette. Her hair is carelessly pulled back in a ponytail, her arms thrown around another brunette girl, while her other arm is wrapped around Harry’s torso as she gives him a dazzling smile.

“Those,” Kendall says pointing towards the picture, "they’re your friends?”

Harry nods, a sort of sadness seeping in his features, “yeah. Friends. Bandmates. Niall’s the blonde one, he’s not really a blonde, he dyed his hair for a girl, Lexi knows the whole story.” Harry shrugs, it was easy talking about them, “That’s Liam on the right, cropped hair, he’s the one who used to keep us in check. And the black haired one, he’s Zayn, kind of introvert at first but he’s one of my best mates. And the one the left, that’s Louis, we used to share this flat. The blonde girl by Zayn, she’s his girlfriend, she’s in a band, Little Mix, maybe you’ve heard of it?

“The curly haired girl she was Liam’s girlfriend, I don’t really know if they’re still together,” Harry felt slightly guilty, for being so cut off from the people he used to call his family. “Anyway the brunette, by Louis, hair in a bun, that’s Louis’ girlfriend, she’s like my sister. Literally.” He finished eyes lingering on the girl he used to call her own.

“And the other brunette,” Kendall asks, softly, testing the waters. “The one by your side?”

“That’s Alexis, she’s uh,” my love, my life, “Louis’ sister, she stayed here for the summer.”

“Oh,” Kendall replies quietly. She’d seen the picture of the same girl on Harry’s nightstand. She doesn’t comment, though. “That’s nice, are they around?”

“Louis moved out, he’s living with his girlfriend. They all live in this complex, but we barely get to meet these days,” Harry replies, a knock sounds on the door right after this. Harry furrows his eyebrows pushing a plate of pasta towards Kendall. “Gimme a minute,” he says walking towards the door.

Alexis

“Alexis,” Harry breathes, there is so much emotion in his voice that she regrets coming here. But she has to, she had promised that she would fix things, before she...died.

“Harry,” she says forcing her lips to curl upwards, “‘afternoon. Did you just get up? I’m sorry.”

“No, no, uh, I’ve been up for a while.”

“Oh, that’s great. ‘Cause the lads should be here any moment. The next album will have to come sooner than we--are you going to let me in?” A flash of something passed his eyes, before he pulls back and lets Lexi in.

“So yeah the next album, will have to be released sooner than next year, so that we can put a stop to the news about the breaking up. I was thinking we can have a small concert, in London itself, but y’all have been out of practice. So we can start the rehea--” Lexi’s toes curl, a feeling so painful that she feels someone choking her to death forms in her throat, tears involuntarily fill her eyes, and she blinks them away, because sitting on her barstool is none other than the stunning Kendall Jenner.

“What was I saying?” Lexi asks her voice a soft whisper as she turns to look at Harry. A painful expression crosses his features, like he wants to hold her in his arms and protect her from everything bad in the world. Protect her from himself. He knows that voice, it’s the voice she uses before she breaks down, before she gives up. It is the most beautiful, yet the most wounded sound he had ever heard.

“Rehearsals,” Harry says quietly, his eyes never leaving hers. That was how he had always looked at her, when she talked. Like no one else in the room mattered, no one else in the world mattered. As if, he could look inside her soul, maybe he could. For all the hurt that she had caused him, maybe this was his revenge. Another girl in her place, but that was what she had wanted all along. She would be alright. She had to be alright.

“Yeah, rehearsals. Today at 4:00.” She turns around to look at the girl sitting near the kitchen, a small smile forming on her lips, “Hi, I’m Lexi.” Kendall is taken aback, it was obvious that she was that Lexi. Harry’s obvious ex. She looks a lot different from the picture, but she’s still beautiful. Her hair which is blonde at the tips, rolls in waves past her shoulders. Her eyes are, liquid, somewhere between green, gray, and blue. A small dimple forming on her left cheek. And just with that smile Kendall knows she’s genuine, all the negative thoughts she had about her fly out the window.

“Kendall Jenner. It’s nice to meet you.”

“Same here love,” An awkward silence falls upon them, but a loud shriek interrupts them.

“Hawwy!”

“‘Ello baby doll.” Harry murmurs, pulling a little brunnette up, and in his arms. He places a kiss on her forehead, “you look beautiful, Felix. How are you today?” He asks pushing his face forward to meet her nose with his own. Laughter escapes her lips, as she blabbers mindlessly.

“Lessi,” Felicity exclaims, her arms reaching out to her. “Hawwy,” she says again pulling on the collar of his t-shirt.

Lexi walks up to her, “Hi darling,” she cooes, pecking her nose. Felicity lets out another adorable giggle, tugging on Lexi’s hair as she blabbers gibberish. Lexi’s eyes find Harry’s, he’s already looking at her.

“She looks like you,” Harry whispers. “Beautiful.” Lexi nods, too weak to do anything else. Harry’s eyes are sad, Lexi hasn’t seen anything but sadness in them since she reached. His head is tilted to the side. “Lexi, I--”

“Alright, are we ready for--. Oh hey! I’m Niall.”

“Kendall.” Guilt forms in the pit of Harry’s stomach, realizing that he had abandoned the girl again. He grips Felicity’s hand pulling her finger out of Lexi’s hair, and he heads towards Kendall.

“Wait, are you two--” Niall stops abruptly, as he sees Lexi. “I’m so bloody confused right now, but I’m not going to ask, because that would be extremely awkward. I’m just going to, uh, talk to Jason!” Niall exclaims picking up the little blonde boy, “pretend I’m not here.”

Lexi laughs, patting Niall on the back. “Niall it’s okay. You can mention Harry dating someone else. I’m not some crazy psycho ex. I swear.” She grins, yet Harry sees the way her lower lip quivers, and she bites it instinctively to keep it from giving away her cover. “I won’t kick your arse Kendall, I give you my approval, just don’t…” break his heart. Lexi closes her eyes, and takes a deep breath, “yeah whatever. Niall, why did you come here in the first place?”

“Album discussion.”

“Right, where are the others?”

“We are here!” Louis huffs, pushing his way amongst the three other lads. “Harry, thanks mate. Oi, is this…”

“No it’s fine, I should be leaving anyway. I’m Kendall by the way.”

“Uh I’m Louis. No it’s fine, if we are intruding, we should be the ones leaving. Harry, you can meet us at my place later.”

“No we need to discuss this!” Lexi cries.

“Why are you so interested in this, when you were the one that caused this bloody mess in the first place.” Liam snaps. Lexi’s eyes widens her lower caught her lip between her teeth yet again. She swallows a lump in her throat.

“Let her be, Liam.” Harry says, “she’s helping, shouldn’t that be enough?”

“Jesus Christ. Louis was right, you’re going crazy mate. You’re not thinking right, she’s a bloody bitch and that’s all she is, but you, obviously are way too blind to see that.”

“Liam.” Harry says, fingers curling into fists.

“Aw hell.” Liam says stepping towards Lexi, “are you fucking happy with the outcome Lexi?”

“Liam,” Lexi says quietly, “I’m just trying to make things right, I’m sorry for what I did, I know it doesn’t suffice, but let me just try.”

“No, it doesn’t suffice. Nothing you do is going to be enough, might as well give up trying and leave. Right now.” Lexi jumps at the harshness in his voice. Her heart beats rapidly against her chest, unwanted memories resurfacing. Her fingers curl into small fists, as Liam’s face starts to look a lot similar to the one which haunts her dreams. Weakly she takes a step backward, before her back hits the kitchen counter. Liam steps forward, his brown eyes blazing with anger, his face mere inches away from hers.

Lexi lets out an uneven breath, trying to focus on breathing. Liam wouldn’t hurt her. This was Liam. Brown eyes. Scott. Liam. Liam. He was a friend. Was a friend. Scott. Scott. Scott. Scott.

She grips the edge of the kitchen counter, trying to take steady breaths. “Liam,” she whispers weakly, she blinks trying to clear her vision, because dancing in front of her eyes is a sneering Scott. Lexi’s fingernails dig into her palm, drawing blood out, her breaths coming out in ragged puffs. Liam reaches to wrap his hand around her arm, and drag her out, when Lexi’s knee reaches his groin in an instant. She turns away, salty tears making their way down her cheeks her fists still clenched.

“Bloody hell, Alexis.” Liam sneers, gripping the counter with one hand. “What the fuck is wrong with you?”

“Lex, are you alright?” Niall asks a tad unsure, he gently places a hand on her shoulder. Lexi flinches, jumping away. Breathe in. Breathe out. In. Out. In. Out.

“Peachy. Just peachy.” Lexi murmurs, wiping stray tears off her cheek. “I’m sorry Liam. You...I...yeah I’m sorry. Shit.”

“I’m out of here.” Liam snaps.

“No! No. You want me to leave right. I’ll do that. Just, stay. You guys need this.” Lexi says, walking towards Harry to place a kiss on top of Felix’s head.

“Don’t, Alexis. Don’t tell us what to do. You lost that right a while ago.”

“Yeah, erm, sorry.” Lexi murmurs, swallowing hard, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. She kisses Jason’s cheek before walking out of the door. Slowly she turns to look back at the five lads she used to call family, to find their eyes on her already. She gives them a faltering smile, with watery eyes before turning away. “Uh, Kendall. Do you need a lift?” Lexi asks without turning around.

“That’d be great. Thanks.” Kendall jumps off the stool, giving Harry a soft smile, with he acknowledges with a nod. Lexi hurriedly wipes away the tears in her eyes and turns to look at Kendall.

---

"Harry's a good guy. He," Lexi murmurs softly, tightening her grip on the steering wheel, "sometimes, he just doesn't know how to show it. You need to understand him to know that all his actions are filled with care and love. When Harry says something he means it."

Kendall turns to look at her, her mouth opening to say something but she doesn't know what. Lexi laughs without humor.

"Yeah, you, uh, probably think I'm crazy. I do too. I probably am. But I'm just saying this because, Harry he has been hurt, a lot. He doesn't show it to the world. He never lets anyone know when he's upset. He cares too much about everybody around him, and not at all about himself.

"If, Kendall if you're gonna fall for him, which you most likely will, Harry has this spell on everybody you're falling for him before you even know it. But if you do fall for him, don't," Lexi's eyes screw shut for a moment, "don't do it because of his looks, or money. Fall for him, because of his soul, and his heart. I promise you, he won't hurt you. Ever. He's not what the world claims him to be. He...he's something else. Something great."

"I--I don't know what to say." Kendall murmurs, awkwardly, she fidgets in her seat.

"Do you like my Harry, Kendall?" Kendall ignores the slip, nodding slightly, that night's memories resurfacing.

"Then just say that you won't hurt him. That you'll love him, give him all he deserves. Plus some more."

Kendall laughs awkwardly, "I don't know about love. Just met him a day ago..."

"Don't use him then." Lexi says firmly. "If you don't think you are going to be there for him at his worst, you don't deserve him at his best." Lexi's breath hitches realizing the meaning behind her own words.

"I...okay."

"Alright, here you go. See you around, Kendall."

"Thanks."

Notes

Yeah, come at me. I'm definitely the worst author out there. My updating schedule is horrible, beyond horrible. I don't even think there is a schedule. But being a sophomore with advanced classes ain't easy. I take that back, no excuses. Just going to say that I'm sorry. Really sorry. But I'll try to get back on track quick, because I can't abandon this story and leave you guys hanging, but you need to do me a favor as well, and vote and comment and subscribe. Because every one needs inspiration to right.

And a huge thank you to all those readers who have stuck around, despite my very sporadic updates. Luv y'all and stay beautiful.

Oh and the new album is too good (old news, I know). Their music and lyrics has developed so much and I couldn't be any prouder. You guys got any favorites, let me know?