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Alex's POV
December 23
It's been five days since I last spoke to Harry. He's called me everyday and has text me multiple times but I just ignore them. Each text is begging me to call him or wishing me a good day. I want to respond, I really do, but he lied to me. He lied to me about something so big that I don't think I'd be capable of forgiving him.
I haven't spoke to Max since the day at the park. Thinking back on it that day was really nice and went a lot better than I thought it would. Max is in a good place right now and even though he didn't treat me the best when we were together I have enough love for him to hope that he finds someone that makes me as happy as Harry does.. did.
Why is it that it was so easy for me to forgive everything that Max ever did to me, but I can't seem to forgive Harry for this one thing. Maybe because all the "little" things that Max did don't amount to the one "big" thing that Harry did. My mom keeps telling me that I need to talk to him, that what he did he only did it out of love, and to ease my mind about the entire situation. But being me, it's proving difficult to forgive.
Forgive and forget. Right?... Wrong... Or maybe Forgive but don't forget, but try to move on.
I'm out shopping for a last minute Christmas present for mom. I knew that I would have ended up spending Christmas with her, but through all of the chaos that my life has been for the last five days I completely forgot to get her something.
I'm making my way to Michael Kors when my phone chimes. I already knew who it was without even looking.
Harry- I know I messed up, and I regret it, but please call me. I love you Alex. xx
My fingers act before my mind can keep up.
Me- I love you.
Just as I'm getting ready to hit send my phone starts ringing, Max's name pops up.
"Hello?" I asked.
"Hey, Alex.. um how are you?" His voice sounded a bit nervous, but what for? I thought we left things on good terms.
"I'm fine, just Christmas shopping. You?"
"I'm good too, um I actually had ask you something."
"Okay?" Where is this going? I wondered to myself.
"Don't feel obligated to say yes or anything, but um..." silence.
"Max?"
"Yeah. I was um just wondering, there's this movie premier tonight and I was told by my manager that I have to go and that I need to bring a date, so I was wondering if you'd go with me? Please?"
"Tonight?" I asked shakily. Was this a good idea? I mean sure Harry and I aren't talking, but we're still together, I think. And wouldn't this look bad if I show up to this benefit with someone else other than Harry.
"Uh yeah, tonight."
"I don't know Max." I said, still thinking about whether this is a good idea or not.
"It's okay, you don't have to. I just thought I'd ask."
It really wouldn't be that big of a deal would it? I mean Harry can't tell me what to do, and he lied to me and I'm still pissed, so it shouldn't matter. "No Max, it's okay, I'll go."
"Really?"
"Yeah, what time do I need to be there and where is it?"
"I can just send a car for you and we can meet at the hotel I'm getting ready at tonight. There's a red carpet that we will have to walk down. Is that okay?"
"Uh... Yeah. I mean I guess." Maybe this isn't a good idea, it's not too late to back out right?
"Thank you Alex, you have no idea how much this means to me, especially after everything I put you through." I could hear the happiness ringing through his voice.
Well shit. It looks like I'm going. "So what should I wear?"
"Red. Red always looks good on you."
After I finished the call with Max I continued to browse around for a christmas gift for my mom, and now a red dress for myself.
Harry's POV
I've been locked up in my house everyday since Alex left. I knew that she would ended up at her moms house so I made sure to call her before Alex got there. She reassured me that Alex just needed some time and that everything would blow over soon enough.
"Should I try calling or texting her again?" I asked.
"Yes, I think you should text her. Honey, the thing with Alex is that even though she may put on this tough exterior deep down she needs constant reassurance that she's loved. She may not be so vocal about loving the people around her, but she needs the people around her to be vocal about loving her. She's very guarded, Harry, and honestly I haven't seen her this open with someone ever. She told me how she told you about her dad and her relationship with Max. She didn't even tell me about the severity of their relationship until two years later. She trusts you, but right now she thinks that she can't trust you, but that isn't the case. I notice her staring out into the abyss and I can tell that she's thinking about you. She missed you. You just need to keep reassuring her that you love her and give her time and she'll be back. I can promise you that." Ella explained.
"Thank you." Is the only thing I can come up with.
"Of course honey. I believe in you. And I believe that you truly love her and I know that she believes it too. She's hurt."
"I know. And I feel terrible. I thought that what I was doing was for the best. I wasn't even thinking about what would happen when she found out the truth."
"I know. But just keep doing what I told you and you'll have her back in no time."
"Thanks again. I guess I should go now. I'm going to text her."
"Good luck sweetie."
Thanks again. Goodbye."
"Bye love."
I took Ella's advice and sent Alex a text.
Me- I know I messed up, and I regret it, but please call me. I love you Alex. xx
The read receipt popped up as well as the speech bubble. She's finally going to respond. But then five minutes passes and the speech bubble is still there. Another ten and it's still there. An hour passes and it's still there. That's when I give up hope and accept the fact that she isn't going to respond after all.
Alex's POV
Luckily the car that Max sent for me arrived before my mom got home from her office so I could dodge all interrogation. I meet Max at his hotel just as he's finished getting ready, his publicist is with him too since she has to accompany him to make sure that reporters only ask certain questions.
"You look amazing." Max said to me once he came out of the bathroom, and while he was attempting to tie his tie.
"Thanks." I blushed a bit and couldn't help but feel guilty for being here.
He struggled some more with his tie before I offered to help him.
"That would be great, thanks." He said, dropping his hands to his side.
I finished with his tie before speaking. "You know, I think your outfit would look better without a tie." I said, while smoothing the tie down.
"You think so?" He smirked.
A flurry of butterflies filled my stomach as I thought about the way Harry would smirk at me, and then a wave a guilt struck me for the second time tonight.
"Yeah, I mean if I were you I'd go sans tie."
"No tie it is then." He said, loosening it and slipping it over his head. He threw it onto the back of the chair next to us before unbuttoning the top few buttons.
"Max, are you ready?" His publicist asked.
"Ready?" He asked me. I nodded my head in response.
"Yep, we're ready." He smiled without breaking eye contact with me.
The entire ride over I felt nervous, for multiple reasons. This was going to be my second red carpet ever, I'm here with Max, and I can't stop thinking about Harry.
"Relax." Max said with a comforting squeeze to my leg.
I smiled at him and then the car came to a stop, the driver came around opened the door for us. Max stepped out first and offered me his hand. I took it and then adjusted my dress. His publicist fixed his jacket and we were off to the red carpet.
There were flashes coming from all around and people were screaming Max's name. And not only Max's name, but mine too.
"How do you two know each other?" A few people shouted.
I knew this wasn't a good idea. This would most definitely get back to Harry and he'd be furious when he did.
As Max and I made our way further down the carpet he put his arm around my waist, I followed suit and he leaned into whisper something in my ear.
"Relax, just picture them all naked."
I turned to him and nervously laughed. "If only it were that easy." I chuckled again as well as Max. "Just try, and also try not to pay attention to what any of them are saying." He said, still smiling for the cameras around us.
Max was ushered over to a reporter from E! News, after going over who he was wearing the host asked him who his date was.
"Oh, this is " he said motioning for me to come join him and resting his hand on the middle of my back. "This is one of my dearest friends, Alex."
"You're dating Harry Styles aren't you?" She asked while her short brown bob blew in the slight breeze.
I felt Max tense a little at the question that was asked. "Yes. Yes that's me." I rushed out.
"Well you look beautiful tonight, who are you wearing?"
"Lanvin dress and Kate Spade pumps."
"Gorg. I love it."
"Thanks." I blushed.
Once we were in the theater and had our seats my phone buzzed multiple times.
Harry- What the fuck is this?
There was a picture of Max and I laughing on the red carpet attached.
Harry- Is that Max?
Harry- Is this really what your doing out there? Is this why you haven't been texting me back or calling me?
Harry- Did you tell him about the baby?
I knew that he'd be made, but I was hoping that he wouldn't find out until I was back at my mom's. I didn't want to respond, but I couldn't leave him hanging.
Me- No I didn't tell him, I'll call you when I get back to my mom's.
Right after I hit send I decided to send him another message.
Me- I love you.
Hopefully that would make him calm down long enough for this movie to be over and for me to get back home.. I mean to my mom's. I don't have a home. Well I do, with Harry. Hopefully.
December 23
It's been five days since I last spoke to Harry. He's called me everyday and has text me multiple times but I just ignore them. Each text is begging me to call him or wishing me a good day. I want to respond, I really do, but he lied to me. He lied to me about something so big that I don't think I'd be capable of forgiving him.
I haven't spoke to Max since the day at the park. Thinking back on it that day was really nice and went a lot better than I thought it would. Max is in a good place right now and even though he didn't treat me the best when we were together I have enough love for him to hope that he finds someone that makes me as happy as Harry does.. did.
Why is it that it was so easy for me to forgive everything that Max ever did to me, but I can't seem to forgive Harry for this one thing. Maybe because all the "little" things that Max did don't amount to the one "big" thing that Harry did. My mom keeps telling me that I need to talk to him, that what he did he only did it out of love, and to ease my mind about the entire situation. But being me, it's proving difficult to forgive.
Forgive and forget. Right?... Wrong... Or maybe Forgive but don't forget, but try to move on.
I'm out shopping for a last minute Christmas present for mom. I knew that I would have ended up spending Christmas with her, but through all of the chaos that my life has been for the last five days I completely forgot to get her something.
I'm making my way to Michael Kors when my phone chimes. I already knew who it was without even looking.
Harry- I know I messed up, and I regret it, but please call me. I love you Alex. xx
My fingers act before my mind can keep up.
Me- I love you.
Just as I'm getting ready to hit send my phone starts ringing, Max's name pops up.
"Hello?" I asked.
"Hey, Alex.. um how are you?" His voice sounded a bit nervous, but what for? I thought we left things on good terms.
"I'm fine, just Christmas shopping. You?"
"I'm good too, um I actually had ask you something."
"Okay?" Where is this going? I wondered to myself.
"Don't feel obligated to say yes or anything, but um..." silence.
"Max?"
"Yeah. I was um just wondering, there's this movie premier tonight and I was told by my manager that I have to go and that I need to bring a date, so I was wondering if you'd go with me? Please?"
"Tonight?" I asked shakily. Was this a good idea? I mean sure Harry and I aren't talking, but we're still together, I think. And wouldn't this look bad if I show up to this benefit with someone else other than Harry.
"Uh yeah, tonight."
"I don't know Max." I said, still thinking about whether this is a good idea or not.
"It's okay, you don't have to. I just thought I'd ask."
It really wouldn't be that big of a deal would it? I mean Harry can't tell me what to do, and he lied to me and I'm still pissed, so it shouldn't matter. "No Max, it's okay, I'll go."
"Really?"
"Yeah, what time do I need to be there and where is it?"
"I can just send a car for you and we can meet at the hotel I'm getting ready at tonight. There's a red carpet that we will have to walk down. Is that okay?"
"Uh... Yeah. I mean I guess." Maybe this isn't a good idea, it's not too late to back out right?
"Thank you Alex, you have no idea how much this means to me, especially after everything I put you through." I could hear the happiness ringing through his voice.
Well shit. It looks like I'm going. "So what should I wear?"
"Red. Red always looks good on you."
After I finished the call with Max I continued to browse around for a christmas gift for my mom, and now a red dress for myself.
Harry's POV
I've been locked up in my house everyday since Alex left. I knew that she would ended up at her moms house so I made sure to call her before Alex got there. She reassured me that Alex just needed some time and that everything would blow over soon enough.
"Should I try calling or texting her again?" I asked.
"Yes, I think you should text her. Honey, the thing with Alex is that even though she may put on this tough exterior deep down she needs constant reassurance that she's loved. She may not be so vocal about loving the people around her, but she needs the people around her to be vocal about loving her. She's very guarded, Harry, and honestly I haven't seen her this open with someone ever. She told me how she told you about her dad and her relationship with Max. She didn't even tell me about the severity of their relationship until two years later. She trusts you, but right now she thinks that she can't trust you, but that isn't the case. I notice her staring out into the abyss and I can tell that she's thinking about you. She missed you. You just need to keep reassuring her that you love her and give her time and she'll be back. I can promise you that." Ella explained.
"Thank you." Is the only thing I can come up with.
"Of course honey. I believe in you. And I believe that you truly love her and I know that she believes it too. She's hurt."
"I know. And I feel terrible. I thought that what I was doing was for the best. I wasn't even thinking about what would happen when she found out the truth."
"I know. But just keep doing what I told you and you'll have her back in no time."
"Thanks again. I guess I should go now. I'm going to text her."
"Good luck sweetie."
Thanks again. Goodbye."
"Bye love."
I took Ella's advice and sent Alex a text.
Me- I know I messed up, and I regret it, but please call me. I love you Alex. xx
The read receipt popped up as well as the speech bubble. She's finally going to respond. But then five minutes passes and the speech bubble is still there. Another ten and it's still there. An hour passes and it's still there. That's when I give up hope and accept the fact that she isn't going to respond after all.
Alex's POV
Luckily the car that Max sent for me arrived before my mom got home from her office so I could dodge all interrogation. I meet Max at his hotel just as he's finished getting ready, his publicist is with him too since she has to accompany him to make sure that reporters only ask certain questions.
"You look amazing." Max said to me once he came out of the bathroom, and while he was attempting to tie his tie.
"Thanks." I blushed a bit and couldn't help but feel guilty for being here.
He struggled some more with his tie before I offered to help him.
"That would be great, thanks." He said, dropping his hands to his side.
I finished with his tie before speaking. "You know, I think your outfit would look better without a tie." I said, while smoothing the tie down.
"You think so?" He smirked.
A flurry of butterflies filled my stomach as I thought about the way Harry would smirk at me, and then a wave a guilt struck me for the second time tonight.
"Yeah, I mean if I were you I'd go sans tie."
"No tie it is then." He said, loosening it and slipping it over his head. He threw it onto the back of the chair next to us before unbuttoning the top few buttons.
"Max, are you ready?" His publicist asked.
"Ready?" He asked me. I nodded my head in response.
"Yep, we're ready." He smiled without breaking eye contact with me.
The entire ride over I felt nervous, for multiple reasons. This was going to be my second red carpet ever, I'm here with Max, and I can't stop thinking about Harry.
"Relax." Max said with a comforting squeeze to my leg.
I smiled at him and then the car came to a stop, the driver came around opened the door for us. Max stepped out first and offered me his hand. I took it and then adjusted my dress. His publicist fixed his jacket and we were off to the red carpet.
There were flashes coming from all around and people were screaming Max's name. And not only Max's name, but mine too.
"How do you two know each other?" A few people shouted.
I knew this wasn't a good idea. This would most definitely get back to Harry and he'd be furious when he did.
As Max and I made our way further down the carpet he put his arm around my waist, I followed suit and he leaned into whisper something in my ear.
"Relax, just picture them all naked."
I turned to him and nervously laughed. "If only it were that easy." I chuckled again as well as Max. "Just try, and also try not to pay attention to what any of them are saying." He said, still smiling for the cameras around us.
Max was ushered over to a reporter from E! News, after going over who he was wearing the host asked him who his date was.
"Oh, this is " he said motioning for me to come join him and resting his hand on the middle of my back. "This is one of my dearest friends, Alex."
"You're dating Harry Styles aren't you?" She asked while her short brown bob blew in the slight breeze.
I felt Max tense a little at the question that was asked. "Yes. Yes that's me." I rushed out.
"Well you look beautiful tonight, who are you wearing?"
"Lanvin dress and Kate Spade pumps."
"Gorg. I love it."
"Thanks." I blushed.
Once we were in the theater and had our seats my phone buzzed multiple times.
Harry- What the fuck is this?
There was a picture of Max and I laughing on the red carpet attached.
Harry- Is that Max?
Harry- Is this really what your doing out there? Is this why you haven't been texting me back or calling me?
Harry- Did you tell him about the baby?
I knew that he'd be made, but I was hoping that he wouldn't find out until I was back at my mom's. I didn't want to respond, but I couldn't leave him hanging.
Me- No I didn't tell him, I'll call you when I get back to my mom's.
Right after I hit send I decided to send him another message.
Me- I love you.
Hopefully that would make him calm down long enough for this movie to be over and for me to get back home.. I mean to my mom's. I don't have a home. Well I do, with Harry. Hopefully.
Notes
How do you feel about Alex being at the premier with Max? Do you think Harry will be okay once Alex calls him, if Alex calls him?Let me know what you think below!
*I tried to insert pictures like in my last chapter, but it wouldn't let me, so I just linked them.*
Random Facts!
Okay so this one kinda sucks, but I just got a new wireless keyboard for my iMAC the other day and today I spilled coffee on it, and now my keys are sticking :( well just the caps lock button, the shift below it, and the tab. But it's still annoying.
P.S
Normally I wouldn't comment on this, but Harry and Kendall can not happen. He's too good to be subjected to that family. Kendall and Kylie both posted a picture on instagram about how their family is judged by the entire world, well their family signed up for that! No one forced them to do a reality TV show, and on top of that they get paid millions for basically doing nothing. Harry has too much talent and depth to be associated with them. (I know that sounds really bad because no one is better than anyone, but honestly come on.) Also, I'm a Harry girl through and through. But also, I can't help but think that whole thing was a publicity stunt. I mean the boys have just released a new album, and Kendall and Kylie have a new pac sun winter line coming out, as well as Kendall just posted that picture of her barely wearing anything. And lastly! Just look at who Kendall's mom is (she is her manager too). Kris is always looking for more exposure and calculating her families next move to stay relevant. Eventually everyone is going to get tired of them and they'll be gone. And honestly that day can not come soon enough, I'll admit I used to watch their shows and I used to like them, but then when Kim married Kris and made MILLIONS of dollars off of the wedding and proceeded to divorce him 72 days later I lost all respect for her, and I slowly began to loose all respect for the rest of her family.
In Conclusion, I just think that Harry can do much better, and if he's just looking for a good time then so be it, but he really needs to reevaluate.
*End Rant*
P.S.S
The Album!!!!!!!!
Oh my goodness! So I know it got leaked early and I tried really hard not to listen to it, but I couldn't help myself (kinda) I listened to one song and then I felt bad so I stopped myself and then waited for the album to be released. I did pre-order it so I got a few songs early, but today I listened to the entire album and my favorite songs are:
Better Than Words
Does He Know?
Alive
Happily
You & I
Midnight Memories
The entire album is incredible, but these are my most favorites (they aren't in order). What do you think of the album!?
Oh and did you watch 1D Day? I did! All 7 and half(ish) hours!
I hope you're okay, love. You can always talk to me if you feel the need.
8/11/14