It Takes Patience
Chapter 36: Distance
*Reagan’s POV*
We arrived back to London around three forty-five and Liam followed Niall back to Zayn and Louis’ house. I was thankful that Harry had slept the whole way back but at the same time a huge part of me wanted to wake him up. He consumed way too much liquor and just because he’s back at home, doesn’t mean that he’s alright. My mind started to go to all different places again. What if he has alcohol poisoning? What if he drank and did drugs? What if-
“Reagan, we’re here.” I hadn’t even realized that we had pulled into Louis’ drive way as my thoughts took over. Liam and Louis got out of the car and opened the doors to the back seat to get Harry out and I gently but quickly removed his head from my lap and got out of the car. When I walked towards the door to the house as Zayn unlocked it, I grabbed Channel’s hand to hurriedly bring her into the house and I waited in the kitchen until they had Harry out of sight. I couldn’t face him consciously knowing that I wouldn’t be able to bear it if he had seen me and went into an outrage again. Channel and I listened at the foot of the stairs as the boys tried to get Harry somewhat sober again.
“Just get him undressed and put him in the shower Liam!” Zayn yelled exasperatedly. I felt so bad for them all. I know they haven’t slept well since yesterday.
“Harry keep still!...Are you going t’ be sick?”
"No! No Harry no! Toilet, toilet, toilet! SHIT! That’s why we said put him in the shower!... Cold water Niall, hot water will only make it worse!” Louis ran down the stairs with Harry’s shirt and jeans in hand and threw them in the washer.
“I for one have never seen so much puke come from one person in my life.” Louis’ comment made me want to run up the stairs kick everyone out of the bathroom and take care of Harry myself but, thankfully my feet stayed planted firmly on the floor. I silently cursed myself for still feeling this way for H. after what he did and how he reacted. I’m sure it would be best for me to leave him alone and even if it isn’t, I will convince myself that it is. Louis grabbed a bottle of water and a mop then stopped to talk to me and Channel.
“How is he” I spoke before Louis could even think to form a sentence.
“He will be fine. When we found him by the stream there was an empty bottle of whisky by him so he’s just pissed drunk. He’ll have it worse in the morning when he gets up, but he’ll live.” I dropped my head slightly and breathed out heavily, moving my hair away from my face when I remembered the session he has scheduled with Dr. Baker today.
“He has a session today at five! He can’t miss that, it was one of Dr. Baker’s stipulations. And what are you guys going to tell his mom? Has she not called yet?” Louis cursed under his breath making it obvious that he had not thought about what would occur once they got Harry back home.
“Is there no way that you can call the doctor and tell her that he’s sick for him? We can tell his mum that he left to go to the session and then came back here to stay the night. I hate to do that to her and ask this of you, but it will be much worse on his mum if we take him home in this state. It would be a believable lie really. I mean Harry’s mum said he was irate when he found out that she got engaged. We could say that he came back here because he wasn’t ready to face her yet and convince her we’ll keep an eye on him while he’s here. I’ll even go get his meds from his mum’s place.”
Louis looked at me pleading as I rubbed my palms on the jean material of my pants before reaching into my pocket to take my phone out and call Dr. Baker.
“Thank you so much Reagan! We really owe you one.” I looked at him nodding my head slightly before he made his way back up the stairs and into the bathroom. I walked into the living room to be away from the background noise so that Dr. B. wouldn’t get suspicious. As the phone rang, I took my free hand and rubbed it on my jeans again. I’m positive that it’s a nervous impulse as my hands began to sweat and my throat dried up. This summer thus far has been filled with lies and secrets. Lies and secrets held from Channel, Laurie, Peyton, Harry’s friends, and now again to the one person who can end it all. When Dr. Baker answered the phone, my voice was much more normal and relaxed than I had expected it to be. The worst part about all of the lying had to be that I was getting better and better at doing it.
“Reagan, how are you? Is everything alright?”
“Hello Dr. Baker, I’m doing fine, but there is a slight problem with Harry.”
“How so, is it serious?”
“No nothing serious, but I just recently went to his house to check on him today and I was informed that he has a stomach bug and has been sick all day. It must have been food poisoning or something.” I held my breath before Dr. Baker replied and it felt like she took hours to do so.
“Oh dear, well we certainly can’t have a session if he isn’t feeling well enough can we? I will grant him today. Keep me updated. How is he doing otherwise?”
“Fine he seems to be progressing really well being at home.” I had to maintain the inner sarcasm that threatened to escape my lips when I told her that last lie. Maybe I shouldn’t lie for him. What if it is in his best interest to go back to the hospital until he is completely better? Then again, what is completely better after taking someone’s life?
“That’s good news. Everything in me hopes that he continues to make progress and keep it up. There’s only a month and a half left. How is your diagnosis and paper coming along?”
“I definitely know more now than I did last week...” Things that I wish I hadn’t.
“Information is key to getting you closer to an analysis. That’s good news Reagan. I will let you go now to continue your work for the day.”
“Thank you Dr. Baker.” When I got off of the phone Niall came down the stairs and grabbed his keys off of the counter.
“We finally got em t’ lie down and go back t’ sleep. Louis is talking to his mum, she’s still so upset but at least she doesn’t know what really happened last night and where he really went.” Channel rose from the couch as Niall nodded towards the door so that he could take us home. When we got in his car, the silence was thick but not awkward like it was when we first started to look for Harry. Niall broke it when we got back to my apartment complex.
“I just want t’ say thank you guys again for coming and helping us out this morning. We really were frantic. We’ll try not to ask you for anything like this again, I know it had to have been a lot on you and risky to lie to the doctor.”
“It’s fine Niall. I’m glad that he’s alright too, besides if he got sent back to the hospital all of this work I’ve done on him so far would have been for nothing.” I realize how harsh the last part came out and I didn’t mean it to sound that way, like I only did it for my work. I really am glad that nothing happened to him and that he is back home safe. Niall looked at me and if I had blinked I would have missed it, but his eyebrows furrowed slightly before he gave me a small fake grin.
“I didn’t’ mean it like that I’m sorry Niall.”
“Yeah, it’s fine. I have one more favor t’ ask of you. Can you please tell Laurie I’m sorry for dropping her off like that? When we found out Harry was missing I kind of pulled her out of the party and made her go home...I just didn’t want anyone else t’ try an talk to her at the party.” I grinned at Niall’s blush and told him that I would tell her before he drove off.
When Channel and I got back in my home for the summer, she glared at me while she sat on the couch.
“When I came here I never expected to deal with so much stress in one day.”
“I know Nel and I’m so sorry. You have every right to be mad at me. We haven’t spent that much time with each other and I have dragged you into the middle of my crap, but honestly that’s why I didn’t want to tell you about it in the first place.”
“And you think not telling me about it would have been better?! So I could just wake up this morning in your apartment and be left here alone while you’re out on a 3 hour road trip to look for a guy that you’re not supposed to be fucking.” I was taken aback by Channels words. I know that she was upset with me but she didn’t have to go there.
“Fuck you Channel! I’ve told you what happened and how bad I feel about what’s happened because I couldn’t hold it in anymore! Why do you have to throw it in my face?! What kind of friend are you? Look I’m tired, we both are let’s just stop before we say some more shit that we don’t mean!”
“Oh I meant what I said Reagan, every word of it. This is too much, even for you and maybe I shouldn’t have suggested for you to continue whatever you’re doing with Harry, but in my defense that was before I found out how seriously fucked up this whole situation is.” Before I could snap back at Channel Laurie let herself in. I stood there frozen not even able to say ‘hi’. I hope she didn’t hear the argument.
“Hey guys!” I sighed in relief when Laurie walked in just as chipper and completely oblivious to the argument that was going on seconds before.
“Hey” Channel and I said in unison and Laurie frowned. You could almost cut the tension in the room with a knife.
“Are you guys okay? I just came up to see if you guys wanted to go shopping with me and maybe catch a movie? Peyton and I got released early today and it’s so nice out.”
“I think I’m gonna stay in today actually I’m kind of tired.” I answered as Channel rose off of the couch.
“I’ll come Laurie it is way too nice to stay inside. Let me freshen up really quick first and I’ll come down to yours?” Channel answered in an overly happy tone.
“Perfect! See you in a bit.” When Laurie left Channel headed to the bathroom to change clothes, brush her teeth, and pull her hair into a bun.
“I love you Rea-tard, but you need to get you’re shit in order.” Channel left my apartment leaving me here alone with my thoughts. I couldn’t have been happier when I received a call from Peyton. I should have gone out with Laurie and Channel. The last thing I need right now is to be by myself.
“Peyton, hi what are you doing babe?” The pet name slipped out of my mouth and I immediately cringed after I said it.
“Hey Rea, I was just calling you to see if you were free today. I’m assuming Laurie told you that we got out early. Do you want to hang out? The weather today is sick, which is quite unusual for London might I add.” Peyton’s excited tone of voice brought the slightest smile to my face.
“I’d love to actually, let me just shower quick and you can pick me up.” Peyton agreed to meet me at my place in twenty minutes and when he got here he gave me his signature pink rose, but this time instead of one there was an entire bouquet.
We went for a walk around London and Peyton even surprised me by taking me to the tour of Buckingham Palace. I tell myself again that I could get used to this, going on actual dates and spending time outside of a house or a hospital. Maybe this distance from H. is what I need to start over and be professional enough with him to get through the summer the way I should have started it off. It started to get late and just as Peyton was going to drop me off back to my place I stopped him.
“Can we go back to yours instead? You know, just to watch a movie or something?” Peyton looked at me and smiled but I hope he doesn’t over think the matter. I just can’t go back home, not right now.
“Sure babe.” When we got to Peyton’s place we sat on the couch and began to watch a movie but before I knew it my eyes began to flutter shut. I was overly tired and there had been way too much stress over the last two days. I fell asleep snuggled next to Peyton on the couch, in his house and dreamed once again of a curly haired green-eyed boy.
We arrived back to London around three forty-five and Liam followed Niall back to Zayn and Louis’ house. I was thankful that Harry had slept the whole way back but at the same time a huge part of me wanted to wake him up. He consumed way too much liquor and just because he’s back at home, doesn’t mean that he’s alright. My mind started to go to all different places again. What if he has alcohol poisoning? What if he drank and did drugs? What if-
“Reagan, we’re here.” I hadn’t even realized that we had pulled into Louis’ drive way as my thoughts took over. Liam and Louis got out of the car and opened the doors to the back seat to get Harry out and I gently but quickly removed his head from my lap and got out of the car. When I walked towards the door to the house as Zayn unlocked it, I grabbed Channel’s hand to hurriedly bring her into the house and I waited in the kitchen until they had Harry out of sight. I couldn’t face him consciously knowing that I wouldn’t be able to bear it if he had seen me and went into an outrage again. Channel and I listened at the foot of the stairs as the boys tried to get Harry somewhat sober again.
“Just get him undressed and put him in the shower Liam!” Zayn yelled exasperatedly. I felt so bad for them all. I know they haven’t slept well since yesterday.
“Harry keep still!...Are you going t’ be sick?”
"No! No Harry no! Toilet, toilet, toilet! SHIT! That’s why we said put him in the shower!... Cold water Niall, hot water will only make it worse!” Louis ran down the stairs with Harry’s shirt and jeans in hand and threw them in the washer.
“I for one have never seen so much puke come from one person in my life.” Louis’ comment made me want to run up the stairs kick everyone out of the bathroom and take care of Harry myself but, thankfully my feet stayed planted firmly on the floor. I silently cursed myself for still feeling this way for H. after what he did and how he reacted. I’m sure it would be best for me to leave him alone and even if it isn’t, I will convince myself that it is. Louis grabbed a bottle of water and a mop then stopped to talk to me and Channel.
“How is he” I spoke before Louis could even think to form a sentence.
“He will be fine. When we found him by the stream there was an empty bottle of whisky by him so he’s just pissed drunk. He’ll have it worse in the morning when he gets up, but he’ll live.” I dropped my head slightly and breathed out heavily, moving my hair away from my face when I remembered the session he has scheduled with Dr. Baker today.
“He has a session today at five! He can’t miss that, it was one of Dr. Baker’s stipulations. And what are you guys going to tell his mom? Has she not called yet?” Louis cursed under his breath making it obvious that he had not thought about what would occur once they got Harry back home.
“Is there no way that you can call the doctor and tell her that he’s sick for him? We can tell his mum that he left to go to the session and then came back here to stay the night. I hate to do that to her and ask this of you, but it will be much worse on his mum if we take him home in this state. It would be a believable lie really. I mean Harry’s mum said he was irate when he found out that she got engaged. We could say that he came back here because he wasn’t ready to face her yet and convince her we’ll keep an eye on him while he’s here. I’ll even go get his meds from his mum’s place.”
Louis looked at me pleading as I rubbed my palms on the jean material of my pants before reaching into my pocket to take my phone out and call Dr. Baker.
“Thank you so much Reagan! We really owe you one.” I looked at him nodding my head slightly before he made his way back up the stairs and into the bathroom. I walked into the living room to be away from the background noise so that Dr. B. wouldn’t get suspicious. As the phone rang, I took my free hand and rubbed it on my jeans again. I’m positive that it’s a nervous impulse as my hands began to sweat and my throat dried up. This summer thus far has been filled with lies and secrets. Lies and secrets held from Channel, Laurie, Peyton, Harry’s friends, and now again to the one person who can end it all. When Dr. Baker answered the phone, my voice was much more normal and relaxed than I had expected it to be. The worst part about all of the lying had to be that I was getting better and better at doing it.
“Reagan, how are you? Is everything alright?”
“Hello Dr. Baker, I’m doing fine, but there is a slight problem with Harry.”
“How so, is it serious?”
“No nothing serious, but I just recently went to his house to check on him today and I was informed that he has a stomach bug and has been sick all day. It must have been food poisoning or something.” I held my breath before Dr. Baker replied and it felt like she took hours to do so.
“Oh dear, well we certainly can’t have a session if he isn’t feeling well enough can we? I will grant him today. Keep me updated. How is he doing otherwise?”
“Fine he seems to be progressing really well being at home.” I had to maintain the inner sarcasm that threatened to escape my lips when I told her that last lie. Maybe I shouldn’t lie for him. What if it is in his best interest to go back to the hospital until he is completely better? Then again, what is completely better after taking someone’s life?
“That’s good news. Everything in me hopes that he continues to make progress and keep it up. There’s only a month and a half left. How is your diagnosis and paper coming along?”
“I definitely know more now than I did last week...” Things that I wish I hadn’t.
“Information is key to getting you closer to an analysis. That’s good news Reagan. I will let you go now to continue your work for the day.”
“Thank you Dr. Baker.” When I got off of the phone Niall came down the stairs and grabbed his keys off of the counter.
“We finally got em t’ lie down and go back t’ sleep. Louis is talking to his mum, she’s still so upset but at least she doesn’t know what really happened last night and where he really went.” Channel rose from the couch as Niall nodded towards the door so that he could take us home. When we got in his car, the silence was thick but not awkward like it was when we first started to look for Harry. Niall broke it when we got back to my apartment complex.
“I just want t’ say thank you guys again for coming and helping us out this morning. We really were frantic. We’ll try not to ask you for anything like this again, I know it had to have been a lot on you and risky to lie to the doctor.”
“It’s fine Niall. I’m glad that he’s alright too, besides if he got sent back to the hospital all of this work I’ve done on him so far would have been for nothing.” I realize how harsh the last part came out and I didn’t mean it to sound that way, like I only did it for my work. I really am glad that nothing happened to him and that he is back home safe. Niall looked at me and if I had blinked I would have missed it, but his eyebrows furrowed slightly before he gave me a small fake grin.
“I didn’t’ mean it like that I’m sorry Niall.”
“Yeah, it’s fine. I have one more favor t’ ask of you. Can you please tell Laurie I’m sorry for dropping her off like that? When we found out Harry was missing I kind of pulled her out of the party and made her go home...I just didn’t want anyone else t’ try an talk to her at the party.” I grinned at Niall’s blush and told him that I would tell her before he drove off.
When Channel and I got back in my home for the summer, she glared at me while she sat on the couch.
“When I came here I never expected to deal with so much stress in one day.”
“I know Nel and I’m so sorry. You have every right to be mad at me. We haven’t spent that much time with each other and I have dragged you into the middle of my crap, but honestly that’s why I didn’t want to tell you about it in the first place.”
“And you think not telling me about it would have been better?! So I could just wake up this morning in your apartment and be left here alone while you’re out on a 3 hour road trip to look for a guy that you’re not supposed to be fucking.” I was taken aback by Channels words. I know that she was upset with me but she didn’t have to go there.
“Fuck you Channel! I’ve told you what happened and how bad I feel about what’s happened because I couldn’t hold it in anymore! Why do you have to throw it in my face?! What kind of friend are you? Look I’m tired, we both are let’s just stop before we say some more shit that we don’t mean!”
“Oh I meant what I said Reagan, every word of it. This is too much, even for you and maybe I shouldn’t have suggested for you to continue whatever you’re doing with Harry, but in my defense that was before I found out how seriously fucked up this whole situation is.” Before I could snap back at Channel Laurie let herself in. I stood there frozen not even able to say ‘hi’. I hope she didn’t hear the argument.
“Hey guys!” I sighed in relief when Laurie walked in just as chipper and completely oblivious to the argument that was going on seconds before.
“Hey” Channel and I said in unison and Laurie frowned. You could almost cut the tension in the room with a knife.
“Are you guys okay? I just came up to see if you guys wanted to go shopping with me and maybe catch a movie? Peyton and I got released early today and it’s so nice out.”
“I think I’m gonna stay in today actually I’m kind of tired.” I answered as Channel rose off of the couch.
“I’ll come Laurie it is way too nice to stay inside. Let me freshen up really quick first and I’ll come down to yours?” Channel answered in an overly happy tone.
“Perfect! See you in a bit.” When Laurie left Channel headed to the bathroom to change clothes, brush her teeth, and pull her hair into a bun.
“I love you Rea-tard, but you need to get you’re shit in order.” Channel left my apartment leaving me here alone with my thoughts. I couldn’t have been happier when I received a call from Peyton. I should have gone out with Laurie and Channel. The last thing I need right now is to be by myself.
“Peyton, hi what are you doing babe?” The pet name slipped out of my mouth and I immediately cringed after I said it.
“Hey Rea, I was just calling you to see if you were free today. I’m assuming Laurie told you that we got out early. Do you want to hang out? The weather today is sick, which is quite unusual for London might I add.” Peyton’s excited tone of voice brought the slightest smile to my face.
“I’d love to actually, let me just shower quick and you can pick me up.” Peyton agreed to meet me at my place in twenty minutes and when he got here he gave me his signature pink rose, but this time instead of one there was an entire bouquet.
We went for a walk around London and Peyton even surprised me by taking me to the tour of Buckingham Palace. I tell myself again that I could get used to this, going on actual dates and spending time outside of a house or a hospital. Maybe this distance from H. is what I need to start over and be professional enough with him to get through the summer the way I should have started it off. It started to get late and just as Peyton was going to drop me off back to my place I stopped him.
“Can we go back to yours instead? You know, just to watch a movie or something?” Peyton looked at me and smiled but I hope he doesn’t over think the matter. I just can’t go back home, not right now.
“Sure babe.” When we got to Peyton’s place we sat on the couch and began to watch a movie but before I knew it my eyes began to flutter shut. I was overly tired and there had been way too much stress over the last two days. I fell asleep snuggled next to Peyton on the couch, in his house and dreamed once again of a curly haired green-eyed boy.
I have read this story loads of times just wish you had finished it it is absolutely amazing. So so good
8/18/18