It was half past midnight, the London air bitterly cold. I sat in the car staring into the store nervously trying to find the courage to enter and buy the desired items. Something in me was holding me back, telling me that there was no way that it could be true, no way that I could possibly be... Pregnant.
But then there's that one ounce of hope that I'd kept with me since I found out that I was possibly infertile and it kept me going. Kept us trying and trying to have a family. Harry and I had always wanted a family, we'd talked about it way before we were married and even engaged. It was always something we thought would be in the cards for us, but that fateful day at the doctor's office, the day she told us the heartbreaking news, I couldn't get pregnant. But alas, here I am, two weeks late and sitting in the parking lot of a convenience store in the middle of the night.
Harry wasn't home, he was on tour in America like he had been for two months. He had just had a week off, whisking me away on a romantic vacation where we took full advantage of our time together.
I wished more than ever for him to be here with me, to go in with me to buy the tests and sit with me while I take them. He was my rock, he got me through so much in the six years we'd been together, I didn't see how I was doing this without him.
The store was empty, apart from the clerk who sat on a stool reading the daily newspaper not paying any attention to me. Thankfully, no one had followed me here, giving me a bit more privacy.
There were so many tests to choose from, I felt lost. Finally I just picked a random four, just to be safe.
After I checked out, I bolted back to the car pulling out my phone. He had to know, he had to know the second I did. He had to know how scared I was to get the negative results that we kept getting. I needed him, or at least in these circumstances, his voice. His soothing voice that would reassure me that we could keep trying and that he loved me no matter what.
Three rings later, he picked up.
"Hi darling."
"H-hey babe."
"Are you alright love?"
The big house was empty without him, but having him on the phone made it slightly less lonely. I sat in the bathroom hesitating on answering him. "Harry, I just, um, picked up some things from the store."
"At one in the morning?" He chuckled.
"Yeah, silly right? But I thought you might need to know what."
"Okay, shoot."
I laughed lightly, "Um, ya know, pregnancy tests."
"What?"
"I'm two weeks late Harry."
"You're sure?"
"I'm positive."
The line went silent as he took in the information.
"Listen, I can't do this without you."
"Baby, I'm right here."
The four tests were set out in front of me to take.
"Harry, I'm scared."
"I know baby, but if it's negative, we'll keep trying yeah?"
"Y-yeah."
Trying, what we've been doing for two years, our entire marriage we've been trying. Saying that we were getting discouraged was an understatement.
Finally I gained the courage to take the tests, Harry talking to me through the nerve wracking few moments.
"And now we wait."
"How long does it take?" I could hear shuffling in the background, probably him moving to somewhere more private.
"Three minutes." I said reading the information on the back of the box.
Pacing around the bathroom, I checked my phone every few moments for the time. It felt like it was taking a lifetime for the little sticks to decipher the results.
"I'm nervous." I breathed, my voice shaking.
"Me too." He said. I could practically see him running his long fingers through his tousled curls as nerves took over his entirety.
"Okay, it's time." He must have been counting too.
I sighed, ready to get the results that we've continuously received. My heart was pounding against my chest as I forced myself to look at the sticks.
The results couldn't be any clearer...
Positive.
"Love I'm dying here!" Harry groaned.
The words wouldn't come, but the tears surely did. My mouth was covered by my hand as tears of joy streamed down my face, we were going to have a baby. After two years and countless fertility clinics and even being told we couldn't have a baby, I was pregnant.
"H-Harry..." I choked out.
"Oh, baby please don't cry, we'll try-"
"No, I'm pregnant. Harry, we're gonna have a baby."
"Are you kidding me?"
"No baby, the little pink lines couldn't be any clearer." I laughed through my tears.
"Oh my god, we're going to have a family. I'm going to be a daddy." He voice was soft and calming. I wanted nothing more in the world than to be wrapped around him celebrating about the life that we created together.
"I love you Harry."
"I love you, so so much."