Louis, Eleanor and Harry were the ones who took me home, and they all stayed the night to watch over me. When Jennifer arrived home from work it took all three of them to convince her not to go and "kick that fucking leprechaun in his lucky charms all the way back to Ireland." apparently. I spent the night drifting in and out of tear filled sleep. It felt like every time I closed my eyes my brain could only conjure up nightmares.

It was about eight am when I finally gave up on sleeping. By then my body had just given up on pretty much everything, even crying. So, I got up and got [url=http://www.polyvore.com/cgi/set?id=56789578]dressed[/url] and sat down on our couch to look out at the window at the rising sun. Despite the rays of sun hitting me (and the fact it was the middle of summer), my entire body felt cold. Despite the fact I truly believed Niall deserved to break up with me, I was still trying to wrap myself around how quickly it came. After the show in Camden everything was alright, and as far as I could tell over our phone calls while he was in Canada - everything had still be alright. My head swam in pain as I struggled to figure out what I had done, when I suddenly felt the couch dip down beside me.

"Hey," Jenny said quietly, putting a cup of tea in my hands, "Lost in thought?"

I smiled weakly and nodded, unwilling to speak just yet.

"I can still go kick his ass you know." She said seriously, even though both her and I were not fighters - and she knew it.

"No," I said quietly, my voice ragged from all the crying I had done, "I underst... I understand why he did it. It was bound to happen." On the last sentence my voice hiccuped and I steeled myself to try and block the tears that wanted to fall, "It's like he said, I-I don't remember so I shouldn't c-care."

"Sis..." Jenny leaned over to hug me as I started to cry again, "That doesn't mean it's okay for you not to hurt. Memories or no, you're used to loving him."

I sniffled against her body and nodded, once again unwilling to sleep.

"Ooooh, sisterly love! Gotta say you two put on a good sho-OW!"

I giggled and pulled away from Jenny to see Harry whining and Eleanor looking at him triumphantly.

"Idiot." Louis said rolling his eyes, "You're a real class act aren't you, Haz?"

"It made A.J smile!" Harry whined, "See!"

"No, I was smiling cause you got hit." I said, throwing a pillow at him.

"I'm wounded!" Harry replied dramatically, wiping away a fake tear. Soon the three of them joined Jenny and I on the couch and Louis grabbed my hand to look at me with complete seriousness. I shifted uncomfortably unsure of if I wanted to hear what he had to say.

"Alice... none of us have any idea why Nia- why he did what he did. He's been acting sort of weird these past few days and this really takes the cake." Louis sighed, "Liam said he and Zayn have been badgering him all night but he won't budge or say a word, I'm sorry love."

"It's fine." I murmered, "It's for the best."

"What?!" Eleanor said frowning, "A.J. you and Niall were THE couple! You two practically walked off the pages of any romance novel! Niall will realize his mistake soon enough."

I smiled weakly, "Thanks."

"We're gonna be in Chicago for a few days still," Harry said patting my knee, "So consider us glued to your side!"

-----
After a day of shopping, I suggested we all have a movie night. Walking around all day while trying to ignore the gnawing pain at my heart wore me out. Harry, Louis and Eleanor agreed and went back to the hotel to pick up some things. Jenny had to work, so I called Lucy to come over to hang out as well.

By seven we were all seated around four large pizzas and ready to watch The Princess Bride.

"I LOVE this movie so much." Lucy gushed as she took a bite of pizza, "It's one of your favs isn't, A.J?"

"Mhm." I murmered focusing on my pizza. Halfway through the movie I quickly noticed I was the odd one out. Louis and Eleanor were snuggled close together and Harry had wasted no time in getting to know Lucy and they were slowly inching towards cuddling themselves.

I sighed, while the movie was one of my favorites, the constant talk of true love made me feel a bit ill. Yeah, if only true love really did exist. So I tried to distract myself, thinking of what I was going to do with all my time off. Obviously I wouldn't be continuing the tour with the boys, but I still had the time off for work. I frowned slightly, the thought of being in my apartment all day long wallowing in my grief didn't seem exactly... enticing. No. I was going to fill the time by going to auditions. When I worked I didn't have much time to also go to auditions and as such, my acting career was at a total standstill. But now...

I would bury myself in auditions and try hard to forget Niall, to forget the pain. Of course right now the pain seemed immeasurable and I wondered if it would ever go away.

[i]"I will never love again."[/i]

Buttercup's words ran right through my heart and I buried my head into my blanket to muffle my sobs.