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That was then, This is now

Unconsciously Conscient


"For fucks sake, I'm her boyfriend!" I yelled one more time, trying to push past Zayn.

"I'm sorry Mr. Styles but only related family is allowed to get in there." The nurse trying to explain for what felt like the hundredth time, her annoying voice really getting on my nerves.

"I already told you her mum is on the other side of the world, I'm the only family!" I spat at her.

"Harry please calm down." Zayn pleaded trying to push me back again.

"No, I need to see her!" I yelled again, feeling the tears build up in my eyes again.

"Sir, you need to calm down or we'll be forced to expel you from the building." A security stepped in between me and the nurse, eyeing me as if I'm some sort of predator.

"Fuck you, all of you!" I yelled at the stupid people with the white smock.

"Haz c'mon, just sit here for a moment." Liam aided Zayn, grabbing me by the shirt and forcing me to sit in the hospital's chair in the waiting room.

This time I allowed them, giving in to sit exhaustion taking the best of me.

"It's okay Harry, she'll be okay…" Liam assured referring to Mia's coma grabbing my arm. I held onto him, bumping my head onto his shoulder shutting my eyes and welcoming the tears again.

I feel like a fucking baby now, I can't stop crying for the last three days since I was informed Mia had been in a car crash with her dad. I came right in to the hospital, completely blind and haven't left ever since. I haven't showered, eaten or even slept in three days and I feel like I have no energy to do anything except cry and insult the damn nurses and doctors for not letting me in to see her.

Not that I could even step out of the hospital's building, the paps haven't left the entrance always trying to get some info of what's going on inside and harassing the boys whenever they come and go. I've been paying a small fortune to keep everything inside quiet, Mia's in one of the best rooms in this hospital in a reserved area of the ICU so they better do everything in their power to save her.

Mia's been in a coma ever since the crash and no one knows exactly what she has. She's had a couple surgeries but as she hadn't woken up already, the doctors don't know what to expect but they've already said she may have some brain injuries but don't know exactly the extent of the brain damage yet. They're not even sure if she'll wake up and that's what hurts me the most.

I refuse myself to go over the possibilities of her not waking up, never see her ocean blue eyes again or her cute accent now that she has a bit of british in her voice mixed with her usual foreign accent making her voice one of the sweetest things that I wouldn't trade for anything in the world.
I'd give anything to hear her laugh in my ears now or feel her hand in mine, I don't care about the costs, either if it was all my money, my success and career or even my life. If I knew that I
could trade places with her, I would… in a heartbeat.

Until three days ago I didn't know that amount of pain was possible. When Mia found out I knew about her dad's disease I watched her break under my eyes and when she left I was sure I wouldn't survive if she didn't come back. I was wrong though, when I knew about the crash I was met with a new level of pain, to the point where it is practically unbearable.

Everyone's been suffering a lot to, the boys come here everyday just like El and Dani. They're the ones who spend more time here with me and the three of us just cry and share the pain when the boys have to go away for band stuff related that I refuse to attend. Everyone knows why anyway so I don't even bother.
Mia's mum and India are stuck in Portugal due to some sort of storm or whatever that's been assaulting Europe these past couple days but I make sure to call her everyday to update her though I tell her the same thing every single day. "the doctors won't say anything until she wakes up… if she wakes up."

My mum, Gemma and Robin went on a trip to the north of the Uk before it all happened and can't come back for the same reason as Mia's family even though my mum said they're doing everything they can to come by train.
Mia's dad is…

"Harry?" Zayn interrupted my thoughts.

I watched as her doctor came out with some papers in hands handing it to the nurse and giving her a few instructions. I forced my legs to stand and walk over to them.

"Harry." The doctor greeted with a nod.

"When can I see her?" I merely asked.

"Harry…" He sighed. "I know you and Mia are in a relationship and her family is not here but it's against the hospital's policy to let anyone who's not directly related to her in."

"We're directly related to her." Zayn gasped standing to the side allowing the doctor to see the other three boys and two girls practically pleading.

"I'm sorry even if I wanted to I really c---"

"Even if you wanted to? The money I give to this hospital everyday bloody day to keep her safe is enough to pay the salary of this entire unit for a few months and you're saying that I can't fucking s---" Zayn squeezed my shoulder warily and the doc cleared his throat.

I took a deep breath and focused on the doc again.

"Look, all I'm asking is to see her, just one time! I'm not saying for you to let me in her room and invade her space, I just want to watch her through the glass window! It won't cause any harm to her, or anyone really. Please, I just really want to see her, just one time." I practically begged ready to go on my knees if that's what it takes. "Please."

The doctor sighed heavily looking back at the nurse who merely shrugged, then back to me.

"Fine." A wave of relief ran down my body and I fell like crying again. "But you can only watch her through the glass, no getting in or knocking on the window or we won't let you do that again," He explained. I nodded eagerly not really listening to any word, just thinking that I was going to see her was enough to occupy my mind.

"Can anyone go to him? Just to make sure he doesn't do anything?" Zayn asked next to me. I gave him a look that clearly says 'what are you doing' but he quickly brushed it off.

"Ehm I guess."

The doctor directed me to the reserved area for doctors and we entered another doubled door with a sign forbidding any sort of noise.
My heart was practically leaping in my chest, I was really anxious to see Mia but terrified at the same time, afraid of what I might find wondering if my heart will handle another beat if I don't find the girl I love in a good shape.

"It's over there." He pointed at a big window sideways to my vision so I couldn't really see anything.

The doc and Zayn stayed at the main doctor as I took cautionous steps towards Mia's room. It hurt to swallow the gulp in my sore throat, I've cried and yelled to much these last couple days.
Sighing as a preparation I forced my head up on the glass window.
I heard my own gasp as I brought my hand to cover my mouth. I felt my cheeks wetting again taking in the sight of the bedroom in front of me.
There was a blonde girl completely lifeless lying on the bed in the middle of the white room. She was unmoved, her lips swollen. An image that would obviously make me smile before but not now because instead of the usual pink I love so much, her lips were purple and dry. Her wild shining blue eyes were hidden under her eyelids, a green and unhealthy ring mark around her left eye.

Her forehead and shiny blonde waves were hidden under a big bandage around her head and I felt my heart tighten for what felt the thousandth time in this minute.
But it was not all, her neck had a huge red mark that looks like it was made by the seatbelt but the marks disappears inside her clothing. The rest of her body is hidden under the sheets but I can see a few wires and tubes coming out of her wrists, full of cuts and bruises and connected to some beeping machines.

I couldn't believe what I was seeing, it's the worst pain possible to see the love of your life lying so lifeless in a bed and helplessly have to watch it from afar.
I press my hands flat to the cold glass and my hand seems to caress her cheek. She's so close yet so far. There's nothing in the world that could ever prepare me for what my eyes just witnessed and no hypnotizer could ever erase the image of my girl looking like that in front of my eyes.

I had completely forgotten I was not alone until the doc and Zayn moved towards me. Zayn kept glaring and mouthing something to me that I couldn't quite figure. I frowned looking at Mia's doc and back to Zayn. He looked at Mia's bedroom door and back at me with a nod and I finally realized what he was trying to say.
My eyes widened when Zayn grabbed the doctor by the arms while he struggled but Zayn seemed to handle it and turned to me.

"Go!" He yelled.

Before my mind could process anything I rushed inside Mia's room and locked the door behind me, pressing a chair to the knob so no one could get in.
I grabbed another chair and rushed to Mia's side, cautiously taking her healthy hand in mine.
I sighed in relief finally getting in contact with her skin. I kept peppering kisses to her hand, peeking under the covers to check if her body is alright.

"What have you done Mia?" I whispered to her, my trembling hand caressing her cheek ever so softly.

My heart aches for her, I can only imagine the pain she was put through not only physically but also psychologically. If only I could hear her voice to confirm she's ok... she's alive.

"Can you hear me?" I asked her. But I got no reaction.

"Harry!" My voice didn't come from her lips but from outside the bedroom.

I looked up to see Zayn, the doctor and two security staff with a set of keys in hand. Oh no!
One of the man opened the door easily and I pressed another kiss to Mia's hand, squeezing slightly.

"I love you, please come back to me." I murmured before my body was harshly pulled out of her and out of the bedroom.

I didn't even fight back because I knew there's no way I would escape the monstrous men so I just took one last look at Mia and prayed that she was looking back at me, but she wasn't so I cried again.



Notes

SHE'S ALIVE!! :D Sort of.. but obviously I would never kill Mia!!

Thank you for all your comments, everyone sounded pretty uneasy so I just updated quickly again..

xx


Comments

@M.J.

It's amazing how you know my writing and that I don't do happily ever after which is true but I don't think I've ever mentioned that (?)
And yes, I'm replying 6 months later, sorry.
I do envision the next step after that last chapter ended but that, of course, is gonna stay in my head. :)
xx

@Marbleskin

thank you, thank you, thank you :)
Yes, I'm working on something else indeed nut no more Harry and Mia :( I'll be in touch soon about new stuff, if you're still around

@Javairia_Directioner

Ahah, that's the FINAL end.. (As you've probably realized after 6 months.) sorry for the waiting but thank you so much for reading it!!

@faithy

That is awesome that you know it word for word!! I'd kiss you right now if I could :) thank you x100

I cried the whole way through, you evil evil woman! I loved it there is no doubt in my mind she takes his hand and they work things out. But of course this is the kind of thing you'd do. I am curious though what do you think happens? I know you dont really write happily ever after, but do see it in your head? I loved this chapter, i had so much fun reading both this stories! You are a great writer and it has been a privelege seeing how you have grown and improved! Congrats on ending this huge project!