4 days later...

"I'm going to make lunch." I stand from the couch and walk to the kitchen.

"I'll help." My dad tries to stand up but I gently push him by the shoulders and force him to sit again.

"You'll stay right here while I prepare something. And don't even try to get up or I'll be really mad." I try to threaten him.

"Yes m'am." He pretends to be a soldier bringing his hand to his forehead.

Since I came back home claiming to know the truth my dad stopped pretending everything is fine and now I can finally see how he really feels.
He's loosing his strength day by day, much faster than I thought. Now that we spoke I know he has lungs cancer in a really advanced stage where at this point there's nothing even the best doctor in the planet can do to heal him.
I can't even cry now, I think I've shed all my tears in these last four days.
Crying used to help the pain but it became so much that nothing helps easing the pain now. I don't even try to stop it now, I just get up in the morning every day, go check dad and help him throughout the day, with meals, giving him baths and everything he needs really. I don't have time to do or think of anything else, I can't even get out of the house because the paparazzi don't leave the door not even at night.

Eventually the news that my dad was sick and I was living here and not with Harry spread and they came to camp at the door. Rumors about a break-up between me and Harry seem to occupy every channel there is in the UK and I can't even watch TV without seeing his face or mine in it. Not that I try to avoid it because even if I wanted he invades my thoughts and dreams every second of every bloody day.
Nothing is confirmed, neither Harry or I spoke to the press just like the boys or our closest friends because there's not really a concrete answer for that, I don't know if we broke up or not, I don't even want to think about that happening but I also can't get over the fact that he lied to me over such an important matter like my father. I know we haven't had the best of relationships lately but he's still my father and is all that matters at the moment, I know our time is limited now, I'm not dumb I know eventually I'll be deprived from his presence and just really want to spend the most time I can with him. I try to look normal in front of him but I know he notices I'm not the same. I think no one's the same after going through a break-up (?) and knowing my father is awfully sick in the same day.

I only allow myself to feel some sort of emotion when I go to bed completely exhausted, before I fall asleep of exhaustion almost in the morning.
Harry comes by every day, I didn't speak to him though but I know he's here.
My dad opens the door for him every time and I think they speak a little but I try to distract myself because I know that if I hear his voice I won't be able to resist.
My dad comes up sometimes and knocks at the door trying to get me out and walk downstairs to speak to Harry but I always dismiss him.
I'm still really hurt by his actions despite my father's claims that my mother practically begged him not to tell me a words so there was nothing Harry could do. Dad also admitted he spoke to Harry himself also asking not to tell me because he didn't want me to act differently with him.
The only people I spoke to was Dani and El because they came by and waited in my room when I was in he shower.

I felt good to speak to them but I tried to shut every theme concerning Harry. I don't have it in me now to consider something else that's not related to my dad.
The rest of boys have all been texting me which I replied to every time only to tell them I'm doing fine and I'll speak to them soon. Harry stopped sending in texts when I asked, no, begged him to give me some space to think.
That couldn't be farther from the truth, I'm not nowhere fine but it doesn't really matter, I'm not important here, supporting my father and helping India through everything is. My sister is too young to experience these sort of things and I try with everything I have to block her pain away and transfer it to me by doing everything my dad needs without her realizing how bad the situation is.

She left yesterday, both mum and I agreed it would be best for her despite her fuss about it because from now on it would only get worse.
I tried with everything I had not to break in front of her, only allowing myself to cry when she entered the plane back home. Holding my emotions back seems more painful but I don't want to let everyone know how I really feel.
I peeked through the door to check on my father, his now fragile fingers flicking through the channels. The house is really quiet now, with only the two of us. My father was never the type of yelling, not even when India and I did something bad, he never raised his voice at us, not even once. That was my mum's job and it's useless to say she used her voice for her and my father together.
I'm more like my mum, a lot actually but I keep my voice to bare minimum practically whispering all the time afraid of breaking anything or anyone if I do raise my voice. I wish I had the energy to scream tho, I could use that gift to shout my pain away even if just for a second.







I keep checking my dad every minute since this morning when I found him coughing blood to the sink. He tried to brush it off but I know it's bad, really bad.
After cleaning all the blood and wash it off at least three times I called the doctor and booked an appointment to this afternoon despite my dad's whines.
I brought the food to the couch and we ate quietly while watching tv.
I cleaned the kitchen after and helped my father get dressed before we leave for his appointment at the doctors.

I obviously had to call the police first to free our entrance from paps.
I supported my father and blocked out the questions and flashes of a few non obedient ones still trying to capture anything that would fit the front page of a trashy magazine.

"Can I drive?" My dad asked when I opened the passenger door's aiding him to get him.

"Absolutely not." I mentioned for him to sit.

"Why not?"

"Because you're in no condition to do such thing, specially since you started having spasms." He's been having that a lot lately, a sign of weakness that his body sends him as a warning.

"I haven't had them in a long time, please Mia it's just a 5 minutes drive." He pleaded.

"I said no, please dad just get in. We'll be late and it was really hard to get you in this gap the doctor had today."

"Let me drive then, I haven't done that in a long time and you know how much I like to drive." He kept his ground. "I promise I'll let you know instantly if I feel like I can't do it or anything."

"Dad…"

"Can't you grant your old man a last wish before he dies?" He blinked. I stared at him, swallowing hard with his words.

"You're not gonna die." I tried to convince him and myself with those words.

"We've already discussed this Mia." It's true, he made sure to have a really serious talk to me about all the things he wanted for his death and with all the stuff he owns, even pieces of land I didn't know about. I pretended I wasn't listening and I will deny it until I'm blue in the face.

"Fine." I sighed with a heavy roll of eyes. "Only half of the drive though." I informed him.

"Why?" He pouted.

"Because I say so." I shot him a large grin. I look like the parent and him the child lately.

My father smiled largely and entered the driver's seat. I climbed next to him, watching his features warily. His face seemed to light up like a child on christmas and it was enough to warm my heart.
He started the drive carefully but eventually pressing a little heavier on the pedal, the car speeding a little more. Apparently he still has strength for what he really wants.

"Careful." I warned trying to reach for the steering wheel but he swat it away.

"It's okay Mia, live a little." He rolled his window down, allowing the wind to get in the car. It does feel good I have to admit.

"Still, you shouldn't hit so hard on the speed."

"You need a little hair, open your window." He suggested.

"I'm okay." I assured him.

"Mia really, I've got it covered." He looked for the bottom of my window pressing to roll it down. I rolled my eyes at him, watching him as he did it.

He smiled at me before a frown toke over his features.

"Are you okay?" I asked when his eyes flicked to the road.

"Uh yeah." He replied stretching his hand out.

"What is it? Are you having spasms again?" I reached for his hand.

"I don't know, it… It's a strange feel, I can't control my hand." He spoke.

"Pull over." I immediately instructed.

"I-- I can't." He said, his eyes watering slightly.

"Dad? Dad are you okay?" I started to panic when the tears rolled over his cheeks.

"I---" He tried to speak.

"Dad, stop the car." I raised my voice, completely panicked, my eyes expelling water too now.

"I- I can't move." He confessed looking at me worriedly.

"Oh my God." I tried to reach the pedal to stop the car, we're going with too much speed for our own safety.

"Mia?" My father grabbed my arm pushing me back up with the little strength he had.

"I'm almost there." I put on an extra effort to reach the pedal.

"Mia!!" He called again more forcefully. I peeked up trying to understand what he's talking about.

"Oh no!" My eyes widened when I heard the honk of the huge truck coming in our direction. We had passed to the other side of the road. I quickly grabbed the steering wheel turning it back to our side again but the action was to quick and too much that the car turned around completely, the sound of the tires racking on the pavement.
I could hear my own screams trying to control the road but it was going with too much speed and the tears were clouding my eyes enough to enable me to see clearly despite my attempts to control it.

"Mia, it's okay, let it go." I heard my father say quietly despite my yelling. His words holding much more meaning, he was actually telling me to stop my actions and let us both get killed in here.

I try to focus on his face but I don't have time before the car smites in some obstacle.
The belt tightens against my body choking to the point where I can't breath properly and I feel a sharp pain and warmth on my head and drain down my forehead. It smells like iron and it's disgusting. The only thing I can feel is pain and more pain.
I try to free myself but my strength seems to diminish by the second just like my dad's. Dad! Before I can glance back at him, a sudden darkness overpowers my senses and I'm forcefully pushed to the other side, my mind shutting down completely.

Notes

The hint some of you claimed to not get was the talk between Dani, El and Mia and later with her father about her relationship with Harry where Dani alleged that if they ever break-up, one of them wouldn't survive (literally)..

Please, please keep voting and commenting!!

xx